Fifty

I hit 51 next month, and that&#x27;s ... well.<p>These decadal anniversaries seem to get more onerous each time. 20? No problem, it just means you&#x27;re not a teenager any more! 30? Okay, you&#x27;re officially a grownup, but you can still party! 40 was pause for concern, but it isn&#x27;t what it used to be, the threshold of middle age: that&#x27;s 50. Oops ...<p>Well, as Terry Pratchett observed, inside every old man there&#x27;s an eight year old wondering what just happened. I don&#x27;t feel <i>emotionally</i> middle-aged. But my knees creak in the morning, I&#x27;ve survived medical conditions that would have killed me if I&#x27;d lived a century earlier, I can remember events -- as an adult -- that happened 30 years ago, and I don&#x27;t have the physical stamina, mental agility, or energy of a 30 year old any more. (Mind you, what they say about experience trumping youth and enthusiasm? It&#x27;s not exactly true, but the experience factor makes up for a lot of the gradual cognitive decline that comes with age.)<p>Like Jacques, I&#x27;m less inclined to put up with fools -- but I&#x27;m also less inclined to get worked up over things. And I&#x27;m probably unemployable these days. (15 consecutive years of self-employment will do that to anyone.)<p>But the biggest thing I&#x27;ve noticed? What look like big opportunities, vanishing in the rear-view mirror of age. When you&#x27;re 30 you can think in terms of going back to university or forming a new start-up. You&#x27;ve got time to plan a new career or nurture a business ahead of you. But by the time you&#x27;ve hit 50, the future is looking cloudy. You don&#x27;t want to train for a new career to see you through the next 30 years because who the hell wants to be working to pay off student loans when they&#x27;re 80? So you get locked into whatever track you set yourself running down twenty years earlier. Changing is hard because you have less of a future ahead of you to change <i>for</i>.<p>If you&#x27;re under 35, my advice would be to think about that. Do you really want to be locked into doing more or less what you&#x27;re doing now when you&#x27;re in your sixties? If not, now is the time to change. The later you leave it, the harder it will be.

I&#x27;m 62. Still excited about what I&#x27;m doing. Love the fact that I can write programs in languages that actually work (as opposed to M$ Basic back in 1980s). Hardware that doesn&#x27;t fail every 10 minutes, etc. O&#x2F;S that does what you expect! I plan to continue creating new apps until 65 or 70. Who knows what happens then. It keeps me going and is better than hitting a little white ball into the woods!<p>Happy Birthday! May you have many more.

I am 58 and can relate to pretty much everything the author wrote, but especially this:<p><pre><code> computer programs are now monstrosities of large numbers of layers of libraries cobbled together to create ever more slickly polished user interfaces showing ever more inane content and advertising. </code></pre> I find it difficult to stay motivated to write software these days, for a few reasons. First, there are specialties. Years ago, you could be a generalist, and be useful writing software pretty much anywhere. And I&#x27;m not talking about just learning the latest fad language or framework. If you don&#x27;t have a long background in neural nets, or transaction processing, or compilers, or you name it, you aren&#x27;t going to be doing work that is <i>both</i> useful and interesting.<p>Second, as the author says, programming these days is often just taking libraries, writing adapters, all to serve slightly more relevant ads slightly faster. What a huge fucking waste of time. After the 2008 financial meltdown, it was noted that the &quot;best and brightest&quot; young people were wasting their talents on the &quot;financialization&quot; of the economy, which did nothing good for nearly everyone. I see the same thing happening now, in software.<p>Third, like the author, I got tired of working for idiots and wasting my time on corporate voodoo, so I left for consulting. While that has much to recommend it, working pretty much by yourself definitely limits what you can accomplish. On the other hand, I have a lot more time to myself, and I&#x27;m enjoying traveling, visiting family and friends, sleeping late, and generally just doing whatever I want.

Wow, my inbox just overflowed with people mailing me happy birthday, now I get it :)<p>Thanks to all!

Nice post, Jacques. Luckily, I&#x27;m only 47.5. I&#x27;ve got a long time before I have your concerns of being 50.<p>I&#x27;ve found that the hardest part of getting older is the work you have to put into your mind and body just to slow the decline of age. You go from being in your 20&#x27;s and eating all the donuts and burgers you wanted to.... to being in your 30&#x27;s where you start having to watch what you eat and limit some portions... to being in your 40&#x27;s where now I&#x27;m pretty strict with what I eat and how much. I hardly ever eat sugar or bread, much less the holy combination of the two in a donut.<p>One of the most disappointing aspects of getting older is my disillusionment with medical developments related to aging. When I was in my 20&#x27;s, I thought that a lot of problems with aging would be solved within my lifetime. Surely, I figured, by the time I was 50, they&#x27;d have eradicated cancer, cured baldness, and developed other general techniques for rejuvenating the mind and body. No such luck, I guess. The older I get and view medicine through the lense of how it can help me with various aging problems, the more I realize that medicine is really still in its infancy. Medicine is fumbling around like the blind men feeling the elephant who don&#x27;t know what they&#x27;re touching. At the rate things have been progressing, fundamental medical miracles aren&#x27;t years or decades away - they&#x27;re perhaps centuries away... but I hope to be proven wrong.<p>That said, there are things I enjoy about getting older, like watching my kids turn into young adults. I hear that having grand-kids is fulfilling, although I hope to avoid that pleasure for at least another 10 years.

Getting older gets you to focus. What is on that list of things I just know I will do someday given the time? Well, whatever it is, it just got smaller. But that doesn&#x27;t really even matter. It is not about how much you do but about doing things well that really counts in life. Not just for yourself but for others too. And not just at age 20 when you have what feels like boundless energy but at age 50 (or whatever) when you have a greater degree of wisdom and wherewithal to offset the energy lapses that inevitably come with getting older. Don&#x27;t rob yourself of the joys that come with aging by letting the limitations overcome you. Each part of life has its distinctive blessings. Make the most of them and be a blessing to others as well as to yourself. If you do that, you will do well and you will age gracefully to boot.<p>Very thoughtful post from a very thoughtful guy. Happy birthday, Jacques.

I&#x27;m early 40s at the moment. I love technology, and love programming and system tinkering&#x2F;admin in particular. I&#x27;m currently a CTO&#x2F;CIO in a niche industry, although I write code almost daily and participate in various technical trenches many CIOs wouldn&#x27;t venture into on a daily basis due to lack of resources.<p>I am sadly terrified of getting older. Not because I fear death (well, maybe a little), but I fear the silver ceiling this industry seems to place on many. Sure, the CIO&#x2F;CTO thing might help, but I&#x27;m not banking on it. I&#x27;ve seen so many qualified folks get replaced by younger, unqualified ones just because of the way IT tends to favor the young.<p>Now I look at my own daughter, who is very interested in following in my footsteps and is already programming and Lego mindstorm&#x27;ing, and I really, sincerely hesitate to push her in that direction. I love the craft and think it&#x27;s very personally rewarding as a creative outlet, but not only is there this silver ceiling, but to stay current you are <i>constantly</i> required to be learning. I spend almost all my spare time working to stay current. I see friends who are lawyers or accountants, and while I would probably die of boredom in either field, there seems to be nowhere near the level of effort to stay current in those fields.<p>While I don&#x27;t think the constant learning requirement has a solution, I really hope to get some time in the future thinking deeply about the silver ceiling problem. Not just for me, but for my tech friends. I personally employee two 60+ folks on my team, and they&#x27;re great resources. I wish other companies would view them in this way. It seems there is something which could be done...even if it&#x27;s a company which distinguishes itself by making a point of hiring senior, aging folks for solving problems which require that level of experience. However, that of course has it&#x27;s own difficult problems to solve (namely, a senior employee likely has a lot of his&#x2F;her own personal overhead to cover, so salary requirements will be understandably greater). Still, if the problems were out there, perhaps a company like that could thrive. Perhaps.<p>Anyway, just the ramblings of a early forties techie who thinks&#x2F;worries a lot about this. One day I&#x27;ll take action either way, because there will come a time where there is no other choice ;)

Welcome to &quot;this side&quot; - the secret is that there are no sides, you might become a day more experienced today than you were yesterday. I don&#x27;t feel (or act) my age and since I don&#x27;t celebrate my birthday (or even let others know it&#x27;s occurred), their guess as to my age is always way low.<p>In any case, you may not consider yourself employable, but there&#x27;s almost always a bias for the &quot;gets things done&quot; person. If your blogging and comments here on HN are any indication, I don&#x27;t think you&#x27;d have an issue with someone that&#x27;s truly looking for the right person. Many institutions are looking for the politically correct person and like you, I don&#x27;t have time for them.<p>Fijne verjaardag :-)

As someone in my early-towards-mid 40s, is it really hard to stay employed? I get that lots of folks are into consulting at this age or other versions of self-employed, but as a guy who got into this field fairly late, I&#x27;m concerned that I&#x27;m going to end up 50 and jobless which will <i>really</i> mess with my retirement plans.

Happy birthday from a 20 years away. I really enjoyed reading ideas from your perspective and I like the way you think. My only hope for the future, is that we could still read and comment other stranger&#x27;s stories on the internet without violating some bullshit law and without needing to validate our identity with a DNA sample in order to express ourselves .

So much of this rings true for me, and I&#x27;m a few years away from 40.<p>As an expat living in the Netherlands who has never really believed in &quot;formal speech&quot;, it really takes some getting used to when people (usually a lot younger than me) call me &quot;u&quot;. I always think &quot;wow, this kid is so polite, how bizarre!&quot;. I still haven&#x27;t really gotten the hang of when <i>I</i> should use the formal you, and constantly call strangers &quot;je&quot;. I&#x27;ve only ever had one Dutch person actually state explicitly that I should call him &quot;u&quot;. It is maybe not a coincidence that he was a bit of a jerk in general.<p>At least living in the Netherlands, our creaking knees will always be able to bicycle where we want to! No big annoying hills like there seems to be everywhere back in the UK, or in other countries. ;)<p>Gefeliciteerd. :)

Thanks Jacques. I first read about you almost 15 years ago. I think you did an interview about the creation of webcams and starting the first webcam community. What struck me was the typical Dutch resentment for success and those that dare to stick their necks out. Commentators would say you were lying or embellishing or try to downplay your successes. That typical envy. I hope you are now totally over that.<p>A few years back you took a few hours to just chat with me, in a period when I was really depressed and did not believe in myself. Thank for you that. It really helped and you demanded nothing in return. A very approachable, commendable spirit -- I hope there are people around you who do the same for you.<p>Jacques. Thanks man! Congrats, and here is to many more years!

I&#x27;ll be hitting 50 in a couple of years, and like Jacques I&#x27;ve noticed my tolerance for bullshit and injustice has decreased. I&#x27;ve tentatively put the former down to a subliminal (mostly) awareness of having less time to waste. I feel more focused.<p>I&#x27;ve also noticed that my tolerance for cynicism has decreased significantly in the last few years. I&#x27;m not totally sure why, but I suspect that I&#x27;ve come to see cynicism (particularly about politics and environmental issues) as the laziness that fuels injustice.<p>I&#x27;d be interested to know of other people&#x27;s experiences.

&gt; <i>When I’m in a group of people my own age I feel as though I’m around old people, I can’t help it.</i><p>This one really rings with me. Unfortunately, many old people act like old people. I once worked at a software agency where even the more ambitious <i>young</i> people acted like old people.<p>Age is just a number, but the only one who decides to fully favour the comforts of the known to the appeal of the new and risky is you. I know 80-year olds who prefer ipads and I know 25-year olds who prefer IBM ClearCase.

&gt; March 20, 2015<p>:P

It takes about ten years to get used to how old you are.

The problem with getting old is that one-by-one all the things that you dreamed of as young and you got to try when got older, feel old and demystified. Suddenly you look out and see less &quot;magic&quot;, less mystery, less things to make you excited, fewer major surprises around the corner.<p>I&#x27;m only (&#x2F;&#x2F;already) in my early 30s but it scares me to think how it might feel, at an older age, to not be able to see anything in the same exciting eye that a teenager does. And the things that might still feel exciting, to not be able to try, due to constraints that &quot;grownups&quot; have (health issues, family, work, other responsibilities, lack of friends willing to participate)

Proficiat Jacques, appearently I&#x27;ll turn 40 next week, it&#x27;s just another arbitrary number. For example, you&#x27;re 42 in base-12 (a much beter base). We&#x27;re all in the same boat... you&#x27;re old enough te remember Bobby McFerrin (now 65) don&#x27;t you? <a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.youtube.com&#x2F;watch?v=d-diB65scQU" rel="nofollow">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.youtube.com&#x2F;watch?v=d-diB65scQU</a>

«It doesn&#x27;t get better: you get better.» (Louie)

Happy Birthday! Prompted by your comment I found this from the Association of American Publishers: &#x27;In the first three months of 2015 they (e-books) have plummeted 7.5% from the same period last year. Meanwhile paperback sales have increased by 8.9% giving further credence that people are switching back to print in greater numbers than originally thought&#x27;. I hope so.

I just turned 40 and whoa I&#x27;ve never felt such a drastic change previously, as ...<p>- Im starting to lose my hair<p>- I gained ten pounds a week or two after my birthday (lost it now after getting back to the gym); 5&#x27;10 178 now.<p>- I suddenly succumb to a foot disease older men have to deal with... it came and went, but could come back. WTH?<p>- Slight depression from all the above.<p>I want my 30s back!

Goddam base-10-centric view of things :-)<p>Happy Birthday!

I hit 50 two years ago. I didn&#x27;t mind turning 50. It was the constant stereotyping that society(at least in the U.S.) that finally got to me.<p>I recall hitting 50 and not giving it much thought, but it seemed like when ever I turned on any from of media, I was reminded of all the pitfalls of getting older. It&#x27;s so depressing, I am thing about getting rid of cable. I&#x27;ll still watch movies on my devises, but I need to tune out the commercials, and warnings? And yes, I got it tobacco causes cancer. I smoke one, or two cigarettes a week, and been around people who smoked; yes--I got it. I raised my chances of getting cancer. Enough?<p>I have been kinda neurotic&#x2F;hypochondrical my entire life; I don&#x27;t want to be reminded daily I&#x27;m going to die. Oh, those cancer center commercials? I don&#x27;t care how sick I was I would never go to one of those centers--just on principle. I really hope that company goes bankrupt. Actually, I wish we could ban all medical&#x2F;Pharmacutical advertisement.<p>As to getting older, I don&#x27;t like it. I had better ideas when I was younger. I guess because my testosterone is startling to go down, the world is definetly lets say-- a little less colorful? My sex drive is way down, but I&#x27;m kinda ok with that. I can focus on boring stuff better than when I was younger. And I find web developement boring! Sorry, I don&#x27;t get excited about this industry. I&#x27;m drawn to it, but never got the romance some of you have for the industry? I am just a web developer, self employed, and always needed to do other things to make a living. Maybe that&#x27;s why? Or, maybe I&#x27;ve never been totally in love with anything I&#x27;ve done? I have a ton of interests, but I never fell in love with any of them?<p>The one thing I really wished I did differently is I wish I made friends with people younger than myself? I know it sounds selfish, but it seems like so many people I knew are gone? For some reason, I didn&#x27;t really like my generation. I found I had more in common with people who were 15 plus years older than myself? I had some really good friendships. Friendships that were solid. Friends that I could trust with my innermost secrets. I don&#x27;t have that anymore. I&#x27;m not feeling sorry for myself, but don&#x27;t do what I did. It&#x27;s lonely.<p>That&#x27;s about it. Oh, yea, if you have an anxiety disorder, getting older does releave some of the symptmology. When I was younger, I just couldn&#x27;t relax. I still can&#x27;t, but I&#x27;m better than I was?<p>If you ever bump into me, please don&#x27;t call me Sir. I am still not my father, and don&#x27;t think I will ever turn into him. I&#x27;m still scared, and don&#x27;t have confidence. I still look at the rest of the world, and still don&#x27;t feel I&#x27;m one of the grown-ups? I am not one of them! I&#x27;ve never fell like I&#x27;m entitled. I don&#x27;t demand respect. I know I need to earn it. I don&#x27;t understand mean&#x2F;narcisstic individuals. I like some rap, but don&#x27;t get Kayne, or Beaver? Don&#x27;t think I ever will? I think tattoos are fine, but never got one. (I never got one because I thought they looked like bruises, and reminded me of people who had liver disease.(platelets not forming as they should?). In other words, I&#x27;m not really that different than the young man I used to be, just look older.<p>I sure miss my dogs! I wish they lived as long as we do?<p>Bye!

Happy birthday Jacques. This is definitely an interesting eye opener article for a young professional like me, giving a clearer picture about how life can be for a curious technical person at 50.

The bit about not feeling your age is so true. I am a little bit younger, but I really don&#x27;t feel that different to when I was 20 - maybe just a little less angry about the world.

Look at it this way: even an old cat jumps into a tree like it was a young kitten. It simply doesn&#x27;t know it is old. So why should we behave any differently?

I&#x27;m turning 50 on October 1st. Thanks for the reminder!

Happy birthday Jacques! I am not far behind you, and I have to say that I am loving my mid forties...

I have a friend that is 53 that still does triathlons with people half his age.