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Ask HN: What made you decide to marry your spouse?

21 pointsby clioabout 8 years ago
A popular &quot;Ask HN&quot; was posted recently, that asked how to find a wife[1].<p>Suppose you have found someone. When do you know it&#x27;s the right time to get married?<p>[1] https:&#x2F;&#x2F;news.ycombinator.com&#x2F;item?id=14332698

14 comments

throway_bayareaabout 8 years ago
Step 1: If your girlfriend is also your best friend then move to step 2.<p>Step 2: if you both want kids then move to step 3.<p>Step 3: If you want to protect your assests against your best friend with whom you want to build a family, go ahead and setup a prenup. Though, you might get stuck at that step because you&#x27;d put your money or your career first then your wife (best friend and mother of your kids) second. Why not? It&#x27;s totally possible. Thought, I would NOT recommend a marriage in this case because it doesn&#x27;t make any sense.<p>Step 4: let&#x27;s say you skipped step 3 and made it to step 4. At this stage, you can pop the question, it makes sense.<p>Congrats.
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iharhajsterabout 8 years ago
Her love for me and she didn&#x27;t go away when I told her I battled psychological disorder (anxiety and depression) in the past. She was the person I could talk any topic with her and she was always on the money with her insightful advice. And she didn&#x27;t drink alcohol, nor smoke, which is hard to find around here. She was religous and sang in church choir. Since I had a lot of bad experiances with girls in the past, mostly on my part, when I met her I told myself, this time go slow but smart. And it&#x27;s been best last 7 yrs of my life. We are married for 2 years and when we felt we matured enough to take full responsibility over our lives that was the decision moment to get married.
ladytronabout 8 years ago
He didn&#x27;t run away when he saw I was reading a nerdy book. Instead, he approached me. Is that your book? He liked my brain.<p>I knew it was time to get married about a week after we met. Everyone else paled in comparison. It took another 6 months to make it official - but I was really married in my own mind after that first week together.
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th3o6a1dabout 8 years ago
Awesome article on this very topic. <a href="http:&#x2F;&#x2F;waitbutwhy.com&#x2F;2016&#x2F;09&#x2F;marriage-decision.html" rel="nofollow">http:&#x2F;&#x2F;waitbutwhy.com&#x2F;2016&#x2F;09&#x2F;marriage-decision.html</a>
chrisbennetabout 8 years ago
After a 22 year trial period, we married for insurance purposes.
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tjalfiabout 8 years ago
jaredhansen[0] posted a great response[1] to this question awhile back.<p>[0] <a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;news.ycombinator.com&#x2F;user?id=jaredhansen" rel="nofollow">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;news.ycombinator.com&#x2F;user?id=jaredhansen</a><p>[1] <a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;news.ycombinator.com&#x2F;item?id=13972765" rel="nofollow">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;news.ycombinator.com&#x2F;item?id=13972765</a>
TurboHaskalabout 8 years ago
If you need to ask, I can only advise you to read the cohabitation laws that apply where you live. You may already be &quot;married&quot; but only for the downsides.
gdferabout 8 years ago
The fun and beautiful is what drew me in. As I got to know the rest of her (smart, good head on her shoulders, confident, compassionate) it became a no brainer.
ddgfloridaabout 8 years ago
Right time? When you both love each other, when you both want to be married, and when you both are committed to staying married.
raartsabout 8 years ago
The fact that I worked for an airline and we could only use the cheap flying perk if we got married.<p>Never used it. Still married.
tutufanabout 8 years ago
Perhaps best not to assume that it ever is.
cm2012about 8 years ago
Met in HS at 15, it was super obvious to us by 19ish when we started living together.
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mike47about 8 years ago
She did!
codevarkabout 8 years ago
I had had two fairly good long term relationships before, both of which ended abruptly, The first time, I got kicked out, the second, I initiated the breakup. I said to my self, &quot;the next one that comes along is going to be the one&quot;. I was playing guitar in a cheap bar one night and a friend&#x27;s friend walked in with her friend. As they walked in, through the smoky, bleary light, that girl turned and smiled at me. End of story.