Ask HN: Do you have any kind of self-destructive habit?

28 pointsby _hv99over 7 years ago

Yes:- Any excess or self-harm like smoking, drinking when you know it doesn't add- Indirect self-harm like sitting a lot- Addictions internet, coding, eating, thinking, etc- Excessive stuff like procrastination when you should be working or just consumption to feel happy/ worth it/ fit in.No: No self harm and a good balance of excesses.If yes, Why? If no, how do you know? Can you delay gratification?

16 comments

KGIIIover 7 years ago

Absolutely. My life is riddled with bad choices, some of which I continue today. I'm constantly surprised I am where I am, and that I'm somehow alive.Can I delay gratification? Sure. I don't always want to do so. I don't fear death. I fear fragility of the mind and body. I don't want 90 boring years. I want 70 damned fun years where every day is the best day ever.I'm nearing that 70 year mark and not even remotely scared. They'll prop me up with opiates and amphetamines. I see that as something to look forward to, not fear.

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NicoJuicyover 7 years ago

Mmmm... Yes, i think of myselve as an introvert.But, i'm not one when i go out and drink. So when i go out, i drink too much ( i always have a lot of one-liners comings up). I'm not an alcoholic, i only drink on friday and saturday evenings ( when i go out)Also, i always have been in extremes. When i wanted to do sport, i did > 10 hours per week ( no alcohol ofc and outside my full time job), but didn't have time for anything else.Now i'm working on my SAAS, day and night.... I don't need people, but i force myselve to be arround them. I don't need to plan anything, i just say yes when people ask... This year, i didn't even celebrate my 30th birthday, cause i was on a wedding.

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mattbgatesover 7 years ago

Not sure if I can call it a bad habit or not, but my relationship suffers because of it, and not sure if my relationship will remain for much longer because of it, but it has kind of been an instigated behavior.Basically, once we past our honeymoon phase, she wants attention and affection sometimes, but not always, usually when she wants it. Other times, she tells me to go away or that she's not in the mood for that. She can be very emotional and other times, very distant, kind of similar to me. It is hard to find a balance or understand that balance.Feeling rejected, I turn to the coding world, get lost in my web apps, and that feeling of rejection lasts for days sometimes so I get so wrapped up in what I'm doing that I don't give her attention or affection when she wants it because that rejection made me prioritise my coding over her.It has been a cycle.. we'll argue about it, and then things will go back to normal, and I'll give her the attention and affection she craves.. then she basically wants me to go away and come back when she wants, rinse and repeat.So I'd have to say my Internet addiction, which is really my coding addiction kicks in. Instead of gaming, I turn to coding, because I feel its more productive than just sitting around gaming. I build both free- and paid- web apps, and I can't just sit there or lie there doing nothing.. it drives me crazy to not be tinkering with something.And sometimes she does get upset with me because I do have to try and focus my brain on watching a movie or a show with her instead of thinking about coding something. I can't sleep at night until I'm tired, so instead of just lying there, or taking some type of pills or whatever, I code until I'm exhausted instead, which means I'm not "sleeping with her" and I think she gets upset about that too.I know some guys will say, "If I had a woman.. I'd always... I'd treat her...." Yup... me too. Past the honeymoon phase where you get to know her, live with her, deal with her bullshit, bad habits and attitude, and get back to me on that one.

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muzaniover 7 years ago

Gaming and debating with people on the Internet.I like progressively increasing my skill. I have to force myself to do passive things like watching TV. Even then, I need shows that are 'active', like Rick and Morty or Game of Thrones, where I can reverse engineer characters, think up conspiracy theories, or do something.The problem is that my choice of relaxation is active, and thus draining. I get better at these things, but it sucks away my attention from things like programming.I like the pain of improving skills, and games are perfect at this. Online debating too, because it takes only 10 minutes to come up with a well phrased answer.Progress at programming is also very jerky. You end up hitting a lot of walls, being forced to debug something, or realize that the plan you spend 2 weeks on was wrong. The problem is usually very vague so there's a meta where you have to figure out what problem we're trying to solve first and whether we have resources for this solution.

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cujic9over 7 years ago

Nothing that I'd share with social media, friends, or family. Bottle up and explode, that's my motto.

ambivalentsover 7 years ago

I think I'm addicted to sugar. I know the dangers and I just can't stop. It really thwarts my other addictive behavior, the pursuit of optimal health.

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thecupisblueover 7 years ago

- Smoking, drinking, drugs- Overspending- Overpartying- Undersleeping- Content addiction- Overthinking- Too much sitting- ProcrastinationOn the outside, I'm an overachieving dude who has his life together. On the inside, I'm a wreck.

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clintonbover 7 years ago

I’m a workaholic, and really like solving problems. This leads to burnout after a few months. I get a bit of a high from solving problems. Also, despite holding a degree from MIT and having worked in software for 10 years, I still have a bit of imposter syndrome. I believe working hard let’s me “prove” my value to others.

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hodderover 7 years ago

We are all on HN right now, so yes. We are all basically wasting time reading ultimately irrelevant news. Fun and interesting sure, but a waste of time.

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jettiover 7 years ago

My abuse of my prescription Adderall. I'll take one and stay up all night and take another in the morning (when I'm supposed to take it) and keep on going. It's terrible for me but it is hard to stop. In fact it just gets worse and then I end up short on my months supply which leads to me falling asleep at my desk.

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eager_noobover 7 years ago

Procrastination. Haven't been able to get a handle on that problem since a long time.

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ludicastover 7 years ago

I get sidetracked by learning new stuff, the mathier the better. Sounds like a humblebrag but it sucks to keep jumping into rabbitholes.

0x00000000over 7 years ago

I spend about 23.5 hours a day sitting or lying down and I eat poorly. I will likely die of malnutrition or stroke by the time I'm 35.

owebmasterover 7 years ago

Sometimes I think that smoke too much weed is a self-destructive habit but after I smoke I think it is a self-healing habit so it depends on the time.

mellowdreamover 7 years ago

Being alive.

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segmondyover 7 years ago

Yeah, I read too much.

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