This is a repost of <a href="https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=16927649" rel="nofollow">https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=16927649</a> from two weeks ago.<p>So in that vein, here's my comment on that one:<p>Getting a little tired of these showing up.
Yes, these services exist, yes some people use them, and yes, it's totally "weird Japan."<p>But no, they're not anywhere NEAR mainstream. I think using the word "industry" really makes the reader think it is and imagine a huge, dysfunctional society. I do appreciate the paragraph or so where they point out that this kind of thing has existed and does exist in other countries, as well -- I just don't understand why people always insist on pointing at a minor subculture in Japan and writing entire spiels about it as if it were a common thing.<p>Imagine a Japanese writer talking about the "greased pig chasing industry" in America.
> “She was acting as a rental daughter, but at the same time she was telling me how she felt as a real daughter,” he said. “And yet, if it was a real father-daughter relationship, maybe she wouldn’t have spoken this honestly.” ... Yūichi Ishii, the founder of Family Romance, told me that he and his “cast” actively strategize in order to engineer outcomes like Nishida’s, in which the rental family makes itself redundant in the client’s life.<p>> I thought about my missed shrink appointment, and about a psychology professor I met, Kenji Kameguchi, who has been trying for the past thirty years to popularize family therapy in conflict-averse, stoical Japan, where psychotherapy is still stigmatized. He said that he thought rental relatives were, in an unschooled way, fulfilling some of the functions of group-therapy techniques such as psychodrama, in which patients act out and improvise one another’s past situations or mental processes.<p>From this reading, it seems to me that Japan's fake relatives are the equivalent of counselors and psychiatrists in other countries.
I cannot help but get irked at the pity-projections that the western media has on Japan.<p>The structure of the article itself is made to sound how the war has damaged the social aspects of Japan - and how the numbers prove so. It starts with the story of a person using these services, till a point you realize the satire. Then the downfalls of such services while gracefully pushing in some irrelevant history.<p>In reality, showing this article to any average Japanese person in Japan, they would feel this is absurd. No such industry exists, there are a couple of weird companies popping up everywhere across the globe. Heard about the fake social media pictures company in the USA?<p>These articles need to stop! Every publication is increasingly posting these uncanny ideas about how strange this country is, too much western obsession.
This sounds pretty wacky at first blush...then I remember a time post-college, post-divorce where I would go to hibachi restaurants because they would seat me with other people.<p>It wasn't a long period of time, but loneliness can be a real and powerful thing. Everyone is happy to offer solutions, but few actually acknowledge how it feels while you're trying to get a solution to work.
I think something like this could work in the U.S. ...esp. tailored at introverts, but add a bit of psychology to the mix, instead of hiring 'relatives' ... hire people to basically help you not be so 'lonely', and also help you to come out of your shell, maybe you struggle talking to women, they might be able to help you with that and help you become a good conversationalist -- etc... I get the grandma ordering up grand children though, it can be really lonely when everyone you know is dead, or gone off to start their own families.<p>A niche someone could start if they were so inclined might be: 'Big in Japan' .. take some of these weird Japan customs/business ideas and make one umbrella company that does it all--so anyone moving to US from Japan can continue those customs, etc... but it's broader so it's not so niche as to not have a place.
Something strikes me as odd about things like this. There is regular discussion here on HN about how lonely some people are, depressive isolation, and so on. And yet here people view this as 'well that's weird' for having a company, however obscure, that would provide a product that could remedy this solution.<p>I see it as little different than prostitution. Somebody wants something that's fulfills a need that's generally provided for free * , yet if those unwilling, unable, or uninteresting in fulfilling this desire are willing to pay for it then why in the world aren't there more companies offering it? I don't think this would even <i>inherently</i> entail a denial of reality. It's just a way for people to fulfill another psychosocial need.
There is a Greek movie based on the exact same idea. Its the "Alps" by George Lanthimos (later known from "Dogtooth" movie).<p>I don't about Japan, but that movie had a quite depressing ending (not to mention that the whole thing was kinda creepy and unsettling).
“I thought I was a strong person,”But when you end up alone you feel very lonely.”<p>BOOM right there... Loneliness and isolation causes people to do weird and desperate things. If you're lonely and isolating it might be time to join a group or get a pet. There are thousands upon thousands of groups everywhere and online (though meeting in person is preferred to combat the isolation part).<p>Personally I see these types of "industries" as predatory... they are no different from the snake-oil salesman selling a dying man a cure for cancer.
I have always been seeing this as a solid need especially in Japan. I know several people in japan who recently divorced that experience loneliness, they would host dinners and meet-ups like every week or so. Plus young people are dating less and less here, Plus Plus there are a lot of socially awkward people who will have a hard time trying to build a family.
Here's an interview with the founder of the rent-a-family agency mentioned in the article: <a href="https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2017/11/paying-for-fake-friends-and-family/545060/" rel="nofollow">https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2017/11/paying-fo...</a>
Every culture has their own "weirdness". It might seem weird to some us, but hey, who are we to tell them how to cope up with their lives if we can't even fix our own.