I think things get a bit harder once you have too much free time on your hands (like retired folks do) and live with a partner. I've been travelling for several months with my girlfriend now (after we quit our jobs), and it is not as easy as when the daily routine of work and other duties is in place. Not saying that it's not good, it is, but it sometimes creates weird tensions that I didn't think about before. Some serious travellers that I've met on the road had similar stories to tell, about themselves or their friends.<p>The root of the problem, I think, is that when you have a job you only really spend 20-50% of your awake time with a partner. When you don't it gets to a 90-100% range, and it is harder. No single person can fill 100% of your time.
You know how people say you get less flexible as you get older? It's generally true, and not just because you have limitations on adaptability as you age. You also are wise enough to know some sacrifices just don't actually work, no matter how much you wish they did.<p>Now multiply that by two. Two inflexible people, both unwilling to shoot themselves in the foot for so-called <i>love</i>, trying to find some means to meet in the middle.<p>Besides, a lot of our relationship expectations are rooted in the idea that a baby will or could be the result. When that stops being true, it gets a lot harder to cave to convention and a lot easier to negotiate whatever terms you two can privately agree upon.<p>Add in the fact that your parents may be dead. Who do you need to please or seek permission from? Possibly no one.<p>Your coworkers or what not may have no idea you have some kind of unconventional relationship. You may be well past the age where your social circle is going to actively butt into your romantic life. If they do, you may just dump them as friends rather than accept that.
This is part of some cynical narrative on HN. Don't buy into it wholeheartedly. Plenty of couples stay together really long despite living in the same apartment. True love does exist, even though the internet loves to brainwash you into believing it doesn't.
It seems regrettable that after having endless subsidies and encouragements to buy a family home, that people are insisting on keeping them long after there's any point in having a large house. Given the housing shortage in so many markets, this seems like another nifty way for the Boomers to pull the ladder up after them.
It's unfortunate the way that sexual relationships are intertwined with finances. Gone are the days where women have little/no earning opportunities.<p>People should be allowed to keep finances separated unless explicitly deciding otherwise.
Sometimes I am amazed at the cognitive flexibility of a writer to turn something into a story. Couples that aren't married and live in different houses? So... dating? This is a story about old people dating? Where a lot of them are divorced so they're maybe a little hesitant to move in together and get married? And there are a few long distance relationships as well?<p>I know this is the kind of pessimism that attracts downvotes, but I can't hold my tongue. The WSJ not only paid someone to write this, but it actually made it into the print edition.
><i>Many couples who begin relationships later in life are keeping separate homes because they cherish private space and financial independence</i><p>Where by "many" the author means "some in my affluent circles of the 10 percenters and up".
This is undoubtedly contributory to the housing shortage. People wastefully living by themselves in space which could house 2 or more individuals are selfishly hurting both the younger generation and the environment.<p>I'd expect nothing less from the Boomers and Gen X.<p>And I'm only somewhat joking.
>><i>Rather than marry or live together, many of them have separate homes and see each other several times a week, or three times a month; they often say they are highly committed to each other but want personal space and independence.</i><p>In other words, they are not couples, just people that date sometimes. Next story please :)