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Tony Hsieh’s American Tragedy: Self-Destructive Last Months of Zappos Visionary

173 pointsby AlexMuirover 4 years ago

9 comments

guiambrosover 4 years ago
Don&#x27;t miss Jewel&#x27;s elegy[1]. She&#x27;s the one one who sent the letter in August. What a beautiful and heartbreaking gesture.<p>[1] <a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.youtube.com&#x2F;watch?v=GxqeOwVl0IQ" rel="nofollow">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.youtube.com&#x2F;watch?v=GxqeOwVl0IQ</a>
floatingatollover 4 years ago
I&#x27;ve seen several really smart people self-destruct under the stress of their lives in my lifetime to date. Each exhibited the same pattern of awesome-burnout-intoxicate-destruction as Hsieh is described as having here, but none were founders, so they had to do it more cheaply. The drugs they each used varied wildly, but every single one was trying to disassociate from <i>burnout</i> long enough to reach their goals — to escape, to get rich, whatever.<p>I can understand why the list of what they fell prey to varies so wildly, because the typical top two most common drugs, alcohol and marijuana, have essentially no intoxicating effect on my brain at all — they do one time per year, but the &#x27;addiction&#x27; curve for me is far sharper than other people, and they won&#x27;t work again for months after that first time. It&#x27;s always been like this for me, before and after I was diagnosed and prescribed medication for ADHD.<p>Every one of them started with alcohol and&#x2F;or marijuana, and after a very brief period of time, those had minimal or no effect whatsoever, so they escalated to a wide variety of more potent disassociative drugs. My mental list is: LSD, cocaine, nitrous, other inhalants. It isn&#x27;t even a surprise anymore to see that someone with charisma and a really interesting view of the world end up failing as they try as hard as they can to get a break from their thoughts. I don&#x27;t blame them. If I hadn&#x27;t watched one of my friends self-destruct and die over this as a teenager, I&#x27;d probably have burned out my brain decades ago by now.<p>So I go through my life with no known intoxicants that work on me — of the set of intoxicants that are considered &#x27;safe&#x27;, anyways — and, bluntly, I would never wish this on anyone. I have an unusual brain that can interrupt addictive cycles with willpower, but until I learned this lesson, I repeatedly found myself caught in the same Hsieh-like loop of &quot;if I just double down, I can finally disassociate enough to get an evening&#x27;s rest from my thoughts and worries&quot;, thinking that maybe if I just consumed more, it might be enough. It never was, and I am lucky beyond belief to <i>now</i> be able to interrupt that cycle without external intervention, before I do harm to my life and body.<p>The pandemic has put crushing pressure on me, and strained my ability to bear reality to the limit, and I still worry that someday I&#x27;ll end up like Hsieh, trapped in a cycle of addiction because I just wanted a one-day vacation away from it all and couldn&#x27;t find it. I&#x27;m not a startup founder, and most of my friends weren&#x27;t either. When I find myself wanting an escape from life for a day, it&#x27;s not because my life is terrible, it&#x27;s because my life is intense like the noon sun is bright. (Like Lantern, if you Know.)<p>It turns out that burnout is the one thing that&#x27;s <i>guaranteed</i> to push my ability to bear the intensity of life to my limits, and in that I think there&#x27;s a critical warning for founders, for workers, for anyone in our industry with the tendency to drink caffeine to calm down and to do the entire project the night before it&#x27;s due. Managing burnout is your number one priority for staying alive, after the bare minimum of bodily basics, because when your burnout level overflows, it can easily and trivially send you into severe addiction and possible death, as happened to Hsieh here.<p>If you suffer the same kind of brain issues that I and those I knew did, if you think that ADHD may apply to you — even just if coffee slows you down - then I beg of you: Beware burnout. It is your greatest enemy, it can undermine your willpower and your defenses against escapism and futility, it can&#x27;t be cured with money or intoxication or hard work towards a goal, and it can lead to you sucking your life away from a small metal canister in the blink of an eye, just trying to get a single instant away from it all.<p>Footnote: The desire to escape can find outlets in religious and cult-like experiences as well; one friend with severe burnout fell prey to &quot;self help&quot; seminars trying to heal from it. I wonder sometimes if this offers a glimpse into the rise of personality &quot;cults&quot; in our modern world.<p>Disclaimers: Yes, everyone has different experiences. Yes, not every ADHD brain is the same. Yes, burnout can affect normal people in this way too. But I&#x27;m not speaking to those circumstances here today. No, I don&#x27;t have secret information about Hsieh, and maybe he spiraled in a familiar way for an unfamiliar reason. This is a reply to the story, not gossip about Hsieh.
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ALeeover 4 years ago
In my 10+ yrs in this industry, it&#x27;s astounding how many founders we&#x27;ve lost trying to hack Maslow&#x27;s hierarchy. I&#x27;m not against drugs, I&#x27;m against addiction because it is terrible, destructive, and so short-term.<p>Founders, you&#x27;re not Peter Pan, your shadow stays with you no matter how many lost boys you surround yourself with. Such a tragedy that he was taken away from us too soon
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rltover 4 years ago
I never met him, so take this with a grain of salt, but I always got a bit of a weird vibe from Tony’s obsession with “happiness”, like he was faking it or overcompensating or something.
maskalerover 4 years ago
I&#x27;m not sure I&#x27;d heard of fun before his death. It sounds sad, and somewhat of a loss.<p>Nice, evenly and non-judgemental written piece.
smabieover 4 years ago
seems like <a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;news.ycombinator.com&#x2F;item?id=25235843" rel="nofollow">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;news.ycombinator.com&#x2F;item?id=25235843</a> was right. Of course his comment got flagged and no one believed him (except me I suppose)
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baybal2over 4 years ago
Why do Americans live in houses made out of wood in 21st century?
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m0netizeover 4 years ago
Typical Forbes hit piece on an unorthodox thinker. Tony was a little to &#x27;anarchistic&#x27; for Forbes. Key phrase:<p>&quot;He experimented with a revolutionary—some would say anarchistic—version of a “holacracy” management philosophy, where no one at Zappos reported to anyone nor carried any titles. (It didn’t work: One out of seven employees took a buyout.)&quot;<p>It didn&#x27;t work? Really? Company was and is doing fine after 17% took advantage of a nice buyout.<p>The bias in the article is obvious - some clips:<p>&quot;while Hsieh remained an extremely rich Peter Pan&quot;, or<p>his &quot;fatal trait&quot; of &quot;not wanting to be alone&quot;<p>Sure, it sounds like Tony was off the rails, and it ended in tragedy. But this hatchet job is not necessary. Just the facts please.
pontifierover 4 years ago
I feel as though I closely missed out on a friendship that could have meant a lot to both of us.<p>In September 2011 a group from Utah went to Vegas to start an entrepreneurial effort called &quot;LaunchUp&quot; I was going to go, but for some reason didn&#x27;t.<p>A friend met Tony there and was recruited by Tony to head the Las Vegas startup ecosystem there.<p>I kept looking for a reason to meet him, and spent a month in Vegas back in 2017. I hung out on Fremont Street a lot, toured Zappos, and tried to contact him through every avenue I could, but couldn&#x27;t meet him.<p>I became disheartened by the business and startup ecosystem in Utah, and began moving everything from Utah to Arkansas right at the time he was moving in.<p>It feels like we had a bunch of near misses and I can&#x27;t help but think that things could have been different if we had connected.