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Ask HN: I just became a father, what is the only book I should read?

11 pointsby maximemanseauover 4 years ago

12 comments

AnimalMuppetover 4 years ago
You shouldn&#x27;t read only one.<p>There are two kinds of books. One kind urges you to be more permissive; the other kind urges you to be more strict.<p>In Zion National Park, there&#x27;s a trail called Angel&#x27;s Landing. You wind up climbing this ridge, with a 1000-foot dropoff on one side, and a 500-foot dropoff on the other side. Parenting is like that. There&#x27;s a cliff on the side of being too permissive. You read a book warning you about that. So you back well away from that cliff. But there&#x27;s a cliff on the <i>other</i> side, too, and you become to strict by trying to not be too permissive.<p>Worse, if your natural bent (or upbringing, or whatever) is toward being too strict, then a book that warns about being too permissive resonates more with you than one that warns about being too strict, <i>even though the second kind is the one that you really need to hear</i>.<p>So, yeah. Beware becoming a parent of only one book.
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jseligerover 4 years ago
There is no &quot;only&quot; book, but <i>The Anthropology of Childhood</i> could be one choice. <a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;jakeseliger.com&#x2F;2015&#x2F;03&#x2F;05&#x2F;thoughts-on-the-anthropology-of-childhood-by-david-lancy&#x2F;" rel="nofollow">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;jakeseliger.com&#x2F;2015&#x2F;03&#x2F;05&#x2F;thoughts-on-the-anthropol...</a>
marz0over 4 years ago
I just bought the book <i>The Baby Owner&#x27;s Manual</i> [0] since I&#x27;ll be in your position in ~6 months. I haven&#x27;t read it yet but it got decent reviews. Curious to hear input from others.<p>[0] <a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.amazon.com&#x2F;gp&#x2F;product&#x2F;1594745978&#x2F;ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o01_s00?ie=UTF8&amp;psc=1" rel="nofollow">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.amazon.com&#x2F;gp&#x2F;product&#x2F;1594745978&#x2F;ref=ppx_yo_dt_b...</a>
obritover 4 years ago
Like others have said, no book will cover it all, which is why I am recommending a daily newsletter: <a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;dailydad.com&#x2F;" rel="nofollow">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;dailydad.com&#x2F;</a><p>Sometimes the advice is really good, other times it&#x27;s repetitive, often I don&#x27;t even read it. But I like getting a reminder each day that I should be present with my kids, work can wait, I should put down my phone and just be with my kids and let them have all of my attention.
giantg2over 4 years ago
No book will cover everything. Use the internet and find some reputable sources (webMD, PubMed, your state&#x27;s laws and programs, etc).
thecrumbover 4 years ago
There is no operators manual. Just enjoy!
dpeckover 4 years ago
Happiest Baby on the Block for guidance on learning how to sooth very helpful the first few months.
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m0lluskover 4 years ago
Nurture Shock by Po Bronson and ... some other person. But please don&#x27;t stop there with this &quot;only book I should read&quot; thing. Sometimes more is more, and that is most certainly the case with books.
andrei_says_over 4 years ago
Not for everything but for attitude and understanding what’s going on, esp. your emotions.<p>Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves by Naomi Aldort, $14 on Amazon.
db48xover 4 years ago
SICP
probinsoover 4 years ago
A brief history of time
probinsoover 4 years ago
manufacturing consent