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Things You're Allowed to Do

537 pointsby thesephistover 4 years ago

48 comments

sellymeover 4 years ago
One time when I was younger, in my late teens, I was walking through the city around 8pm. I suddenly felt rather cold, and went through the typical 15 seconds of internal grumbling. I then had an epiphany, and walked into a nearby department store to purchase a jacket. Somehow I&#x27;d never even considered that as a possibility previously.<p>As silly as it may seem, I use that singular point in time as the reference for when I commenced adulthood. I&#x27;ve got no idea if others have similar experiences (I grew up very poor, so I was probably primed against the idea of spontaneously buying something to begin with), but the contents of this list seems to be very much in the same vein.
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keiferskiover 4 years ago
This reminds me of an old video of Steve Jobs. His idea is simple, but it&#x27;s really powerful. In short: the world is something you can change, not merely participate in.<p><i>When you grow up, you tend to get told that the world is the way it is and your life is just to live your life inside the world, try not to bash into the walls too much, try to have a nice family life, have fun, save a little money.</i><p><i>That’s a very limited life. Life can be much broader, once you discover one simple fact, and that is that everything around you that you call life was made up by people that were no smarter than you. And you can change it, you can influence it, you can build your own things that other people can use. Once you learn that, you’ll never be the same again.</i><p><i>And the minute that you understand that you can poke life and actually something will, you know if you push in, something will pop out the other side, that you can change it, you can mold it. That’s maybe the most important thing. It’s to shake off this erroneous notion that life is there and you’re just gonna live in it, versus embrace it, change it, improve it, make your mark upon it.</i><p><i>I think that’s very important and however, you learn that, once you learn it, you’ll want to change life and make it better, cause it’s kind of messed up, in a lot of ways. Once you learn that, you’ll never be the same again.</i><p><a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.youtube.com&#x2F;watch?v=kYfNvmF0Bqw" rel="nofollow">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.youtube.com&#x2F;watch?v=kYfNvmF0Bqw</a>
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k__over 4 years ago
My findings:<p>Sleep until noon every day.<p>Work only as much as you need.<p>Work from home, or anywhere else for that matter.<p>Have multiple romantic partners in parallel.<p>Have platonic friends of the opposite sex.<p>Share multiple flats with multiple people (i.e. live in multiple places, but cheap)<p>Study 10 years.<p>Make your own iced tea in the fridge.<p>Buy food in bulk.<p>Drink tap water.<p>Create your own dishes by mixing ingredients.<p>Cook&#x2F;fry&#x2F;bake food you would usually eat raw.<p>Eat food raw that you would usually cook&#x2F;fry&#x2F;bake.<p>Sleep everywhere in your home.<p>Learn languages, instruments, or sports after you turned 30.<p>Drink no alcohol at a party and still have fun.<p>Start&#x2F;stop smoking and drinking after 30.<p>Found a company like you would buy a game console.<p>Take no VC money.<p>Take muliple years and tries to create a good product.<p>Write music&#x2F;give concerts for yourself or your friends only.<p>Don&#x27;t wear shoes outside.<p>Don&#x27;t have an opinion on a topic.<p>Overall:<p>Don&#x27;t play pre-defined games in your life, but ask if they make you happy. You only have one life, make the most out of it.<p>Sometimes you have to play by some rules made up by other people to get into a better place, but look at them closely, it could very well be that they are more open to interpretation than they first seem.
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eyelidlessnessover 4 years ago
An astonishing amount of this list amounts to “spend money”, so while these things may play well here I think it’s worth pointing out that a large majority of the population is not allowed to do those things because they can’t afford to.
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legerdemainover 4 years ago
This list links to another one in the same spirit: &quot;How to Trade Money and Time.&quot;[1]<p>To be totally honest, all lists like these make me think of young male friends who went through a distinctive weird phase in their early 20s. For a period of 1-2 years, they would scour books ranging from self-help to moral philosophy in order to build a Simplistic System for Living. Maybe it had to do with getting their first engineer salaries, because a central tenet of my friends&#x27; philosophies somehow always ended up being &quot;time and money are interchangeable.&quot;<p>Of course, it is naive to think that just because many things can be bought, <i>all</i> things can be bought, at least reasonably. And as my friends got older and acquired adult responsibilities, families, roles in the local community, they dropped their philosophical regimen and just tuned into typical affluent suburbanites.<p>But it&#x27;s that glimmering realization that still strikes me as kind of fascinating to watch: &quot;I can buy... things!... with money! That means I can buy... anything!&quot;<p>In particular, I&#x27;d love to know what exactly the person in the post I linked to was thinking when writing this sentence:<p><pre><code> &gt; Spend more to go to events where you will meet exactly the people you want. </code></pre> Everything that comes to my mind feels either niche or unreliable. An expensive professional conference? You&#x27;re either already part of that professional community, or going to an event like that is kind of a mixed bag. Paid dating services? Maybe I don&#x27;t understand that world. A fancy party where you get to mingle with VCs? That&#x27;s very specific. Are there meetups where the cost of attendance is a significant filter?<p>My experience in this arena has been that you need serendipity, and <i>it&#x27;s hard to buy serendipity.</i><p>[1] <a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;meteuphoric.com&#x2F;2014&#x2F;03&#x2F;25&#x2F;how-to-trade-money-and-time&#x2F;" rel="nofollow">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;meteuphoric.com&#x2F;2014&#x2F;03&#x2F;25&#x2F;how-to-trade-money-and-ti...</a>
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avhon1over 4 years ago
&gt; Treat fines like payments &gt; e.g. park illegally and let yourself think of the (expected value of the) fine as a parking fee<p>This doesn&#x27;t seem like something you&#x27;re &quot;allowed&quot; to do. Maybe more like &quot;able&quot; to do, in the sense that you can violate other laws, and maybe the payoff or the risk&#x2F;reward ratio makes it worthwhile. My understanding of &quot;allow&quot; is that it means people will accept you doing something. The existence and enforcement (like fines) of rules that prohibit doing things seems exclusive to something being &quot;allowed&quot;.
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iandanforthover 4 years ago
Some more that are free(ish):<p>Pick from your spices at random when cooking and resolve to use whatever you get<p>Schedule working sessions with remote coworkers where you share a zoom room but just work<p>Shave your head and donate your hair<p>Volunteer to speak with elderly (maybe by phone for now) and collect their life stories<p>Learn who is building what in your neighbor hood (e.g. <a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;dbiweb02.sfgov.org&#x2F;dbipts&#x2F;" rel="nofollow">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;dbiweb02.sfgov.org&#x2F;dbipts&#x2F;</a>)<p>Picket things by yourself<p>Find a big mud puddle and jump in it until you look like a monster<p>Climb trees as an adult<p>Play music on street corners<p>Go to church and ask questions until you&#x27;re asked to leave<p>Knock on people&#x27;s doors and introduce yourself<p>Troll craigslist for free ceramics (plates dishes etc) and smash the heck out of them<p>Take apart your toaster and put it back together again, don&#x27;t stop until it works again
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jclulowover 4 years ago
&gt; Buy goods&#x2F;services from your friends<p>Certainly you are _allowed_ -- but if it&#x27;s for an economically meaningful service, like renting an apartment, the follow-on suggestion that it&#x27;s &quot;only weird if you make it weird&quot; really fails to capture how likely it is that it _will_ change the nature of your relationship as soon as someone decides not to pay, or whatever other irreconcilable issue comes up. Just be careful when going into business in any way with people you otherwise like.
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mklepaczewskiover 4 years ago
If you&#x27;re procrastinating a lot I can highly recommend hiring someone to sit beside you and watch you. For me ROI was insane. 33%-50% more billable hours (currently at 5h&#x2F;day), income after expenses rose by 50-66%. Nothing worked for me, to do lists, apps, pomodoro, organizers, calendars. But when someone watches me I just work. Every day I connect with that person at 9:00 AM sharp through Hangouts, share my screen and his webcam (I need to see the other person, I don&#x27;t need to share mine for it to work on me) and we spend like this 8 hours a day. Unfortunately, focusmate didn&#x27;t worked for me either, I&#x27;m such a good procrastinator that I was putting off making appointments ;).
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onecommentmanover 4 years ago
Thumbs up for personal trainer.<p>For this community especially, there will come a time when sedentary starts to take its toll. For me, 35+. It is a royal pain in the rear to try to start a fitness program on your own and stick to it. Too many excuses and too likely to overdo it and either injure yourself or lose motivation.<p>Enter the personal trainer. It took me 6 months of training to get over the hump and into a self-sustaining mode. 3 days&#x2F;week for 26 weeks. You don’t need elite training. If you skip on a day, you are skipping on a person. They will ensure you stay safe and motivated. Worth every penny and pays dividends for decades. Split it with a friend and get the semiprivate rate.
zobaover 4 years ago
&quot;Engage a human productivity monitor - I know two people who have hired people to sit next to them or frequently contact them to keep them on-task&quot;<p>Shameless plug: if you&#x27;re looking for a productivity monitor I can (personally) help: <a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;coding-pal.com&#x2F;" rel="nofollow">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;coding-pal.com&#x2F;</a>
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borishnover 4 years ago
&gt; Follow up many times | You won’t make people mad if you’re polite.<p>I am getting lots of emails from outsourcing companies. I ignore them. I find their follow up emails extremely frustrating.<p>&quot;Thanks for taking the time to read this email. After I sent my previous email (See below) I had put a reminder in to check-in with you to see how things were going with the need of a Data Engineering.&quot;<p>Why should I care about your reminder?
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greyhairover 4 years ago
&quot;Say “I don’t know” or “I don’t have an opinion” when you don’t&quot;<p>My father drove this into us as kids. It always made sense to be, and then I grew up, and realized how many times adults just make shit up to avoid looking like they don&#x27;t have the answer. My in-laws are pros at this, and playing Balderdash against them is impossible as a result.<p>To this day, as some one that has been an engineer for 36 years, if someone asks me a question and I don&#x27;t know the answer, I say &quot;I don&#x27;t know&quot;, generally followed by, &quot;let&#x27;s see where we would find that answer&quot;.<p>And I am raising my kids with the same advice.
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AndrewKemendoover 4 years ago
This looks like an almost exact rehash of most of the advice from Tim Ferris&#x27; four hour work week.<p>Basically: Outsource your personal life to accomplish things that you want to do. Ferris was using Brickwork India at the time if I recall.<p>[1] <a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.brickworkindia.com&#x2F;" rel="nofollow">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.brickworkindia.com&#x2F;</a>
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bltover 4 years ago
&gt; <i>Treat fines like payments. e.g. park illegally and let yourself think of the (expected value of the) fine as a parking fee</i><p>This is why all fine-based penalties should scale progressively with income.
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forgotmypw17over 4 years ago
Live largely without using money.<p>Minimalism, abstention, freganism, hand me downs, barter, begging, and luck.<p>Make websites which work in any browser, including 25yo classics, in the spirit of the open web.<p>Sleep without a schedule.<p>Ditto kay on multiple parallel romantic partners, with a whole larger than the sum of the pieces.<p>Travel somewhere without any lodging plans, only a sleeping bag.<p>Think for yourself and don,t do unhealthy things even if they are normalized. This is a whole other list.<p>Maintain your health and sanity as top priority over anything else.<p>Abandon materialism and attachment.<p>Harm no living being on purpose.<p>Make friends with mammals, plants, insects.<p>Meditate any time of day for any length of time as many times as see fit.<p>Be effective and happy while doing all this.<p>Tailor your own reality based on your intent.<p>Not eat for 72 hours comfortably and be better off for it.<p>Sadly, I am seemingly not allowed to have a reasonable Web browser with a view source button and unstupid address bar on a small form factor device. I,m looking, though...
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beefmanover 4 years ago
A few of these things tend to empower. Most of them don&#x27;t.<p>What reliably empowers is: choose a skill and practice it constantly. So few people do this, it&#x27;s a practically guaranteed route to financial, social, and intellectual security. Taking the time to do your own grocery shopping, or not, is a gating factor exactly never.<p>Almost all other types of human activity are weak compared to the compounding action of just doing something all the time. In the short term, activities like complaining or optimizing random chores may seem stronger. But on timescales of years they&#x27;re just noise.<p><a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;twitter.com&#x2F;sama&#x2F;status&#x2F;1331256688998051844" rel="nofollow">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;twitter.com&#x2F;sama&#x2F;status&#x2F;1331256688998051844</a>
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acjohnson55over 4 years ago
I once missed an overnight bus in a developing country, which was going to result in the loss of a day at my destination. After sulking for a few minutes, I posed the idea that we offer to pay someone to drive us overnight, under the suspicion that this would be surprisingly affordable.<p>Turns out, it was affordable, and we did it. It was, however, the scariest night of my life. I don&#x27;t recommend doing this, but it was a lesson in what is possible, if I think outside the box.
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nsajkoover 4 years ago
&gt; park illegally and let yourself think of the (expected value of the) fine as a parking fee<p>It seems that (in San Francisco) it can be cheaper to pay the ticket fines than pay for the parking upfront like one is supposed to do: <a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;news.ycombinator.com&#x2F;item?id=24796412" rel="nofollow">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;news.ycombinator.com&#x2F;item?id=24796412</a>
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idolaspecusover 4 years ago
Details aside, I think it’s good the point that you can (if you’re lucky) proactively engage with the world on your own terms. Anecdotally, as a new first time home owner I’ve been recently rediscovering this fact and it has been so immensely positive for my psyche. It’s like I was playing a game where the world was 99.9% closed off and now I’m part of reality again.<p>Side note: this experience has also really opened my eyes to the importance and power of affordable home ownership.
AnimalMuppetover 4 years ago
When a checkout clerk asks if you have a coupon, you can reply &quot;No, but you can give me a discount if you want&quot;. That works maybe 5 or 10% of the time. To me, that&#x27;s worth the 10 seconds to say it.
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andrewljohnsonover 4 years ago
I doubt the marginal gains from sending followups on cold emails can make or break any business, it&#x27;s rude, and it&#x27;s mildly illegal.<p>Maybe I&#x27;m just grumpy, but... if you send me a cold email, I&#x27;ll either respond or delete it. Then, if the original didn&#x27;t have an &quot;unsubscribe&quot; link, plus you follow up on it, I&#x27;ll tell gmail to block you.
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jbandela1over 4 years ago
&gt; Surgery for appearance or comfort<p>Be very careful about this. Surgery in the modern age is safe, but there is always a risk, whether from the surgery itself, the anesthesia, or from infection.<p>Be sure that you are really sure that the benefits outweigh the risks.
ramraj07over 4 years ago
Is there any service which allows you to share a personal assistant among many people? I would love to offload many of my menial tasks but I don&#x27;t have enough to cover the time of a decent assistant. And anyone who is okay with sitting with their twiddling thumbs turns out to be not that good!
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guidoismover 4 years ago
Something missing on the list that I found out a few years ago: Hire a personal stylist to help you find what kind of clothing works for you. This is especially helpful to the stereotypical geeky male nerd like me. It helped me a lot to go to a clothing store with this person and learn what works. Friends work too but it was an epiphany for me to hire a pro for this. Money well spent that is still paying off in my ability to dress nicely.
smitty1eover 4 years ago
It is still substantially true that the Internet is an autodidact&#x27;s delight.<p>There is so much excellent online content that, given a public library (beside the library itself) one can gather as much knowledge as one wants.<p>Three other recommendations I give all youngsters:<p>- stay sober<p>- minimize debt<p>- remain married
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EamonnMRover 4 years ago
&gt; Tape over annoying LED lights<p>Also yet another use for BluTac
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spoonjimover 4 years ago
“Things you’re allowed to do if you’re rich.”
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emeralddover 4 years ago
&gt; Actually turn the heat&#x2F;AC on<p>I live in Texas, a good chunk of the year, it would be nuts to try to live without A&#x2F;C (We&#x27;re not quite Death Valley, but it can get pretty hot here ...). So, I&#x27;d amend that one to:<p>&quot;Open the windows and turn off the A&#x2F;C&quot;<p>I really like the few months a year where I can do this and not get cooked!
speculator14over 4 years ago
Only in the last couple years did I realize you could buy t shirts you like instead of just wearing giveaways you have accumulated.
nicbouover 4 years ago
In aggregate, paying for all those things might chip at your disposable income and tie you to a certain lifestyle. You are only good at two things: earning money at your job, and spending it. The whole system is based on how much money you make, and that variable can change unexpectedly.<p>There is also a time cost to orchestrating all those services. Aligning schedules is not nearly as efficient as doing thr work yourself.<p>I prefer the idea of working less, spending less, and learning to do things yourself. Getting your hands dirty gives you a better appreciation for the result. It makes life more interesting and leaves you with a more diversified skillset.
jdkeeover 4 years ago
Is HVAC duct cleaning necessary? The intake air ducts pre-filter can accumulate dust but that is what the filter is for. Post-filter ducts are filled with cleaned air flowing through them. What am I missing?
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vmurthyover 4 years ago
Something that happened recently! (I am 35 :-o) : I was a frequent (~3-4 times a day , 5 mins each time) visitor to coupon sites [0] hoping to snag that elusive discount. It hit me that over the course of 1 year I might save ~$500 but I&#x27;d have to spend 30mins each day (so potentially 200 hours a year in time alone not to mention the context switching) to save ~$500. My time is worth &gt;$2.5&#x2F;hour isn&#x27;t it? So, I now have consciously decided to save up the extra $500 for these sort of purchases. Totally worth it!<p>[0] www.ozbargain.com.au
inglor_czover 4 years ago
Oh, this speaks to me as well!<p>Just like Mr. Cvitkovic, I grew up in a very frugal environment - out of necessity. But it took me a lot of time to realize, in my adulthood, that I can now afford some tradeoffs.<p>Grocery delivery is big on my list. I hated, hated, hated going into malls to shop. So did my wife. So we switched to grocery delivery five or six years ago, and never looked back. And in Covid times, it is a double blessing.<p>Of course, it is easy to &quot;overcorrect&quot; and start spending too much. That is part of the process of learning, after all.
diehundeover 4 years ago
I would also add:<p>- You are allowed to buy lunch&#x2F;dinner as much as you want and not feel bad for not wanting to cook.
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enriqutoover 4 years ago
Basically a &quot;rich people&#x27;s guide to life&quot;. A bit depressing for those of us that cannot afford most of the things described here. No, I&#x27;m not actually allowed to do any of this because I don&#x27;t have enough money; thanks.<p>&gt; park illegally and let yourself think of the (expected value of the) fine as a parking fee<p>That one made me laugh out loud. Is it a serious document or a parody of sorts? Is it mocking a &quot;rich&quot; people&#x27;s lifestyle?
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jsmoover 4 years ago
&quot;Choose your own adventure&quot; :)
jhanschooover 4 years ago
&gt; Give to charity<p>It&#x27;s really worth properly doing due diligence before you commit to the donation. And if you don&#x27;t have a good cushion yourself, rationally speaking, chances are you should save it. Just earmark that amount to be willed to charity upon death or extraordinary loss.
LockAndLolover 4 years ago
I would like to hire a physicist (probably particle physicist) to write a paper about an idea I have for a battery. It would be really great to have a verdict on it with an in depth reason of &quot;why&quot; and &quot;how&quot;.<p>I have considered studying physics myself to answer the question (free education FTW), but won&#x27;t have the time for another 3-4 years (unless I happen upon a hundred thousand euros or so to pay my living expenses during the 3-5 years of study). Paying an expert to do it seems reasonable.<p>Do free lance researchers exist?
hermitcrabover 4 years ago
&gt;Sure you could proofread your own document.<p>No you can&#x27;t. You can&#x27;t tickle yourself and you can&#x27;t proof read stuff that you wrote. You will just read what you thought you wrote.
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Buttons840over 4 years ago
Here&#x27;s mine: You&#x27;re allowed to be productive in a sub-optimal programming language or library. Something my perfectionist self needs to hear.
fossuserover 4 years ago
Asking obvious questions is one I’ve thought about. You learn a lot and make progress faster that way.<p>I agree with most of the stuff in this list - they’re at least things to consider.<p><a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;zalberico.com&#x2F;essay&#x2F;2017&#x2F;02&#x2F;21&#x2F;asking-questions.html" rel="nofollow">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;zalberico.com&#x2F;essay&#x2F;2017&#x2F;02&#x2F;21&#x2F;asking-questions.html</a>
egypturnashover 4 years ago
* Modify your stuff * * Rotate your monitor to portrait<p>...and write a script to do this, along with rotating your drawing tablet to match (which may actually involve rotating it the <i>other</i> way depending on where the cable is and what works with your desk. Because poking around in the prefs with just <i>one</i> of monitor&#x2F;tablet rotated is a major pain in the ass.
lazyjonesover 4 years ago
I learned to use computers to automate things instead of having to talk to people to get them to do menial tasks for me!<p>More seriously, some good suggestions there that aren&#x27;t too obvious, like hiring article authors as consultants instead of googling for professionals.
renewiltordover 4 years ago
It&#x27;s funny. His conclusion with the &quot;life is cheap to save&quot; was that he could save lives. Mine was that I don&#x27;t care that much about the arbitrary life.
01000010xover 4 years ago
This is basically the book &quot;The four hour workweek&quot; by Thimothy Ferriss in a blog post
dredmorbiusover 4 years ago
Some of these tips may backfire.<p>Parking illegally may trigger a $25 fine. Or a $1,000 tow.
gautamcgoelover 4 years ago
Lol I shared an office with this guy in grad school. Yo Milan!