I ended up reading the whole thing.<p>In my life, I put a lot of time into understanding other people. I find doing that helps me be a better human.<p>Your story showed me again how we may not understand our own selves!<p>Lack of understanding causes a lot of grief in this world.<p>A peeve of mine is personal judgement. Often, when we do that, we lack a solid basis. And we may mean well, or we may not. The poor basis remains either way, as does the angst and grief.<p>Of course we judge ourselves, and may lack that solid basis all the same. I have unwound that mess for myself a time or two and that was the trigger to just understand being human better.<p>Thanks for telling your story. I read it and can feel the layers peeling back, your days brighter, vibrant. Hope it only grows better from here.