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Startups say the darndest things

175 pointsby niklas_aover 13 years ago

15 comments

localhost3000over 13 years ago
This seems to be the new trend on HN job posts: "we're xyz ycomb company. we're solving extremely difficult technical problems! [end]" ...yes, routing all those lunch orders must be a real pain...
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keiferskiover 13 years ago
"Pre-revenue" seems like such a ridiculous term. It should only be used post-revenue to describe the period of time...pre-revenue.<p>Unless, of course, that every startup founder is a pre-billionaire. ;P
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d_rover 13 years ago
While not mentioned in the article, one annoying phrase that has emerged recently is "X for Y". "An AirBnB for music." "A Yelp for wedding dresses."<p>To me this speaks: "We aren't able to clearly explain what we do, but here's this other well-known company that solves a similar problem in a different market. We'll piggy-back from the recognition of their name. Look at us, look at them, and try to make a connection."
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ernestiparkover 13 years ago
<a href="http://www.collegehumor.com/video/6507690/hardly-working-start-up-guys" rel="nofollow">http://www.collegehumor.com/video/6507690/hardly-working-sta...</a>
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beagledudeover 13 years ago
this is sadly extremely accurate the disruptive part especially
mcmcover 13 years ago
There is so much noise out there that mediocre companies manage to position themselves as the best of the best, or at least manage to make the best companies look foolish at this point.<p>The problem is that it's a lot easier to imitate the talking points of successful startup than it is to actually imitate the success.
Geeketteover 13 years ago
Funneh. Particularly enjoyed “We’ve got great backing" as = "We managed to convince VCs to give us money but we haven’t convinced any actual customers to do so".
dj_axlover 13 years ago
"We've got early traction" = Our investors has made sure their other portfolio companies use our product.<p>Would you rather work for a company where the investors can't even convince their portfolio companies to use the product? Sure I get the humor. Maybe a solution would be to actually name one of the (hopefully big/famous) companies that use the product, instead of being vague. "Some great places have employed our solution! But we can't reveal any of their names!" Um. Yeah.
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rokhayakebeover 13 years ago
The "You will get a chance to shape the product" translation is way too funny. Definitely gives a different perspective.
mozartbuover 13 years ago
ROFL "You will NEED to shape the product since we don't know what we are doing."
Strategoover 13 years ago
See Mule's <a href="http://unsuck-it.com/" rel="nofollow">http://unsuck-it.com/</a> for more.
jsavimbiover 13 years ago
They'd be better off prefacing each statement with "We wish ..." as it would sound a lot more sincere.<p>To be honest, the descriptions that stand out most to me are "we have X problem within Y context and we need a solution that will solve Z for us. Can you focus on it exclusively for six months?" Those usually turn out to be the most interesting problems to work on and will probably not attract people who are just interested because of the company is in a particular industry segment or focusing on a certain technology.<p>Work hard, play hard? You're probably doing neither and your holiday parties suck.<p>edited: "not attract"
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CPlatypusover 13 years ago
"All-star technical team" = "Each developer will tell you the others are stars. Perspectives from outside the circle might differ."
billpatrianakosover 13 years ago
Definitely funny, entertaining, and there's a case to be made that its true a lot of times.<p>I don't know how to feel about it though. On the one hand I'm hoping it was a joke and nothing more as there are some good apples out there but then I also remember that there are a bazillion little startups that are just either clueless, incompetent, or decent but overhyped and overfunded.
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lellover 13 years ago
Since when are such cynical attempts at humour posted on hn? Best not to read something like this if you want to stay motivated enough to do the work required to get "post-revenue" whatever that means.