This is mostly just to let off some steam, as I'm not sure much can be done about my situation. I'm a 20-year old Male, diagnosed with ADHD in my senior year of high school.
School has always been a big struggle for me- I'm sure many of you can sympathize. Its difficult for me to pay attention to a subject unless I'm very interested in it, And even when I do manage to get focused on a subject i cannot control how focused I am going to get (I explain it by using a photo with a strong Depth Of Field even though they are all in the photo only certain parts are clear)
My organizational skills are abysmal, as are my sense of time and ability to prioritize tasks. I used to mask my struggles out of shame and a desire to do well in school and make my parents proud, but even my greatest efforts did little more than keep my head above water.
When I was finally diagnosed and put on medication, everything was SO much easier- for a while.
Right now I'm a freshman in college, I feel like I'm drowning in the demands of homework, classes and work. I am completely exhausted and I'm falling further behind all the time.
And I cant help but think and worry how I will be able to graduate
I’m currently taking two programing classes and things are not going as planned I have been trying so hard, and I just don’t seem to get it. The idea’s make sense and are clear and I have to say, my teacher’s are pretty awesome but i can’t remember the stuff, i have been sitting on my books last night for well over 2 hours reading these two pages they made sense and all but when it came to the highlight I couldn’t seem to pull the two strings together, I’ve had private tutors but they helped very little since understanding is not an issue here
I am a total computer geek and I know quite a little bit of JS/HTML/VB and I have books on all of them, but I cant actually “do it” and it shatters me every time I’d love to know them but I can’t, nothing I’ve tried worked
I am so worried that this semester, I won't make it into my major, either.
I'm so overwhelmed and frustrated; I just want to plop down on the floor and cry. I hate that I'm ADHD. Accomplishing anything seems to be 10 times harder for me than it is for anyone around me. I watch all these people my age accomplishing all the goals I have for myself, and I'm so angry at myself that I can't do it too.
I just don't know how to go about fixing this. And I'm tired and overwhelmed and stressed beyond belief.<p>Thanks so much for reading this rent and if you have any ideas suggestions please let me know
---David
I am ADD as well, and an accomplished research scientist.<p>Learn about hyper-focus; how to engage it, and how to keep it going.<p>Get some good headphones, and a play-list of music you like that is familiar (a small list that you play on repeat).<p>Ritalin (or other add meds) will help.<p>Don't learn by repetition; if you are like me, repetition is toxic to you. Learn how to make reusable components so you only have to write once.<p>Choose difficult tasks; things that require you to invent, and use your whole brain. Things that you have to stumble through are a lot easier remembered than things you read in a book.<p>If you can, turn the lights off.
As someone who is ADHD (though not sure to what extent i.e. mild vs severe), I completed my Computer Science degree and was less determined than you were. In that respect, you will be fine. Everyone goes through this and feels overwhelmed by the workload, but you will make it through. I developed non-medicated ways to cope (e.g. will make sure I have a lot of alone time for my brain to recharge, put EVERYTHING on a to do list right when I think about it so I don't forget, do small tasks immediately also so you don't forget, etc). You will find a way that works for you in time, so don't worry about that. Overall, I found that my interest in CS was overshadowed by other interests given what is probably a shared tendency to come up with lots of ideas, be creative, etc. I feel like there is a lot of pressure for people capable of completing engineering coursework to study engineering and take engineering jobs (especially since coding is hot right now), but I encourage you to really take a look at what your strengths are and what you love to do. Maybe you'll find that it's CS, but if it's not that's okay too. College is primarily a time to learn about yourself and what works for you. It may seem tough in the short run, but you'll make it through a stronger person. Good luck!
55yo progammer here - ADHD on Dexedrine as a kid.<p>There are lots of ADHD type folks in programming. Even though you are more distractible, you can also learn to hyper-concentrate. As you age you have to take care of your concentration and explicitly protect it.<p>Things to checkout:
1. Coffee or other caffeine sources. ADHD brains are usually calmed by stimulants (up to a point).<p>2. Keto (<a href="http://reddit.com/r/keto" rel="nofollow">http://reddit.com/r/keto</a>). Brains run much better on ketones, often ADHD symptoms decrease. Also, many programmers are fat from poor eating habits.<p>3. Foam earplugs or a set of shooter's earphones - while music can block out distractions; it can also keep you from obviating problems instead reducing you to merely solving them. Silence is your friend. (<a href="http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=shooter%27s+ear+protection" rel="nofollow">http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3D...</a>)<p>4. Study or work environment free from visual distraction.<p>5. Learn about flow. Your hyper-concentrating ADHD brain will achieve it. (<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flow_(psychology)" rel="nofollow">http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flow_(psychology)</a>)<p>best of luck,
steve
David,<p>I've read your rent and I must say that I can recognize myself some years ago in your story. Studying without the ability to concentrate is hard, and even though while you are intelligent enough it seems like you keep on failing on your goals.<p>Yet, you are who you are and you're going to have to live with it. It is really easy to see your ADHD as a glass ceiling and blame your current failure as a student on it. Still it wont solve your issue.<p>Try to focus on the aspects of yourself that you can influence rather than the ADHD where you just will have to learn to live with.<p>A book that I would like you to recommend reading is called "the 7 habbits of highly effective people" by Stephen Covey. It was a real eye opener for me to focus on the right things and totally changed my negative attitude.<p>I hope this can be of any help.<p>Best regards<p>Dmitry
Not to sound incosiderate, but isn't computer programmer one of the worse jobs for a person with ADHD? Programming for a living requires hours of near constant focus, every day.<p>Have you considered an alternative career, where your condition is less of a drawback, or can perhaps even be turned into an advantage?