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Excellence is a habit, but so is failure

810 pointsby dvrpalmost 2 years ago

43 comments

SanderNLalmost 2 years ago
I found it interesting to learn about the etymology of the word &quot;character&quot;. It comes to us from Latin which took it from the Greek (χᾰρᾰκτήρ) which comes from kharasso (χαράσσω) - I <i>scratch</i> or <i>engrave</i>.<p>Our character can be thought of as the result of a long process of engraving or scratching. I tend to see it as a solid metal shield full of scratches from long battles. The resulting grooves tend towards virtue or vice. A sustained habit of wise choices makes it easier to do the right thing - even when it is hard - when the time comes and it will come. A marriage, a deathbed, a career. Life has its fair share of hard choices and having grooves in your soul that guide your choices towards the virtuous helps immensely.<p>That&#x27;s also useful to know for when you have unimportant tasks to complete. For some people this may comprise the majority of their career and&#x2F;or life. However, those &quot;unimportant&quot; tasks still scratch your soul and those scratches ultimately matter. Even seemingly mundane things like taking out the garbage can be done with virtue in mind.<p>I&#x27;m fun at parties by the way.
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wccrawfordalmost 2 years ago
Life is about taking risk. We make daily decisions that involve big and small risk constantly.<p>Choosing to enjoy life today instead of waiting for tomorrow for that enjoyment isn&#x27;t a <i>failure</i>, it&#x27;s a choice. It comes with risk and tradeoffs.<p>Everyone thinks there&#x27;s a magical line that everyone else should take that straddles that line between enjoyment today and tomorrow. That lines doesn&#x27;t exist, and isn&#x27;t even the same from day to day.<p>Looking back and regretting a lifetime of decisions is caused that the consequences from those earlier decisions. Once that weight becomes too heavy, the regret sets in.<p>IMO, the way to combat that is two-fold.<p>First, in the moment, be conscious of what the risks are, and if they are worth it. If they aren&#x27;t, take <i>pride</i> in settling for less at the moment so you can safeguard your future. You&#x27;re doing something hard and good, and it should feel good in itself to do it.<p>Second, when you look back, <i>remember</i> the joy you had at the time. It was judged, to the best of your ability, to be worth it <i>at the time</i>, and you should continue to feel warm and fuzzy from that joy today, even if bad things have come about as consequence for it.<p>For instance, like the author, I gained rather a lot of weight. Then I lost most of the excess. Then I gained half of it back. Every day is now a struggle to try to get my weight back down, and my blood pressure is back up so high I couldn&#x27;t have dental surgery safely the other day, and I&#x27;m back on medication.<p>According to the author that&#x27;s a failure, but I had a <i>lot</i> of really, really enjoyable meals. I ate the vast majority of them with friends and family. Many of them were either cooked by family, or were special occasions. Calling those meals &quot;failures&quot; now would be saying that it was a mistake to enjoy that time with my family and friends, and it absolutely wasn&#x27;t.
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Arisaka1almost 2 years ago
Ever since I quit my first job I&#x27;ve been tinkering with languages and frameworks. And every time I would complete a book or course I&#x27;d face the decision of building something on my own.<p>That building never happens. 1 month later my portfolio is nonexistent, there are no projects, and my blog is a figment of my imagination. And right now I&#x27;m in the process of learning yet another framework.<p>So I&#x27;ve been thinking: This must be something worse than what I imagine. I read about perfectionism, fear of shame and judgment... bingo. I can tell that the root of the problem isn&#x27;t that I can&#x27;t work on a personal project, because I do have them. But the moment it&#x27;s a portfolio project the question isn&#x27;t &quot;what would help me learn?&quot; but &quot;what would help me demonstrate to my future employer that I deserve a chance?&quot;<p>This is a behavioral habit, a disastrous one and potentially career-ending or at least progression-ending. And it may have started with me trying my best not meet external expectations or minimize my footprint to avoid being exposed to bullying, trolling, nickname calling, ever since I was a little kid. And that seed didn&#x27;t happen overnight, it took a lot of daily conditioning to turn a child from risk-taker to risk-avoider.<p>That&#x27;s why I&#x27;m wary of giving the advice to beginners &quot;just start building projects&quot;. It&#x27;s not that the advice is bad, but there&#x27;s just too many factors at play and failure to do so is not always about one&#x27;s intelligence.
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xorvoidalmost 2 years ago
I’m continually struck by how brave Andreas is for talking about his addiction problems out in public. In most every interview he leads with it when he could just easily say a vague: “I found myself with a lot of free time”.<p>Addiction can come with a LOT of shame baggage. To embrace vulnerability over it is quite substantial. Thank you Andreas for being a positive example for the world! Keep up the great work!
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bsuvcalmost 2 years ago
Pertaining to habits, this stuck with me from James Clear&#x27;s Atomic Habits [1]:<p>&gt; Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become. No single instance will transform your beliefs, but as the votes build up, so does the evidence of your identity. This is why habits are crucial.<p>[1] <a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;jamesclear.com&#x2F;atomic-habits" rel="nofollow noreferrer">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;jamesclear.com&#x2F;atomic-habits</a>
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zackmorrisalmost 2 years ago
IMHO there&#x27;s a level of understanding beyond this, which might be called grace. I identify as a lifelong failure, but I no longer place blame on specifics like addiction or body weight or relationship issues. The truth of my existence is that the world is really messed up, but also beautiful despite the dysfunction. And I&#x27;m grateful for the adversity which woke me out of the fantasies which distracted me throughout so much of my life and added to the suffering of others.<p>Loosely that means that every time I took a drink, there was a reason, like maybe I was lonely because I was rejected by someone. Maybe I was fat because I was too broke to take care of myself. Maybe I was mean to my partners because I was projecting my own frustrations.<p>Now I look at life more like a game. I&#x27;m drawn to fringe ideas and projects with an overwhelming likelihood of failure. I&#x27;ve been through the ringer so many times that I&#x27;m more of a loosely held together hodgepodge of components than a coherent identity. But I keep showing up. I&#x27;m hardened from adversity but I&#x27;ve alchemized that into softness and an infinite well of empathy for others struggling with the human condition. I cheer inside when the meekest among us speak truth to power. I live in service to others now, who are an aspect of myself.
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nwienertalmost 2 years ago
I think the new generation of weight-loss drugs are going to be a revolution because they give you power over bad habits, wholesale.<p>ICYMI: <a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.theatlantic.com&#x2F;health&#x2F;archive&#x2F;2023&#x2F;05&#x2F;ozempic-addictive-behavior-drinking-smoking&#x2F;674098&#x2F;" rel="nofollow noreferrer">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.theatlantic.com&#x2F;health&#x2F;archive&#x2F;2023&#x2F;05&#x2F;ozempic-a...</a><p>Anecdotally, they really work. It’s not just your food cravings that are mostly stopped in their tracks. But in some miraculous fashion it seems all your “bad” cravings are squashed, while your good ones (side projects, chores, work) stay intact. The only good one I can see slightly down is sex, but as well with that it does also feel like you have a lot more control in that area.<p>I think we’ll eventually see them as first line prescriptions for all types of addicts. It’s part of the reason I sort of want to throw some money into their stock, but then again it’s hard to know how that all turns out as multiple manufacturers have these drugs and there are many more analogues in the pipelines.<p>But I find it so interesting, as it really upsets my notion of morality. Yes, resisting your temptations without drugs seems like the obvious better world. But our modern world is simply overflowing with temptation. Fast food, advertisements, sugar in everything, caffeine in everything, drugs everywhere. It was far easier to be ascetic when there just wasn’t that much around. But suddenly on one of these drugs you feel… powerful, in a way. Like you’ve gained a superpower. It’s a really weird experience, and I don’t hate it.
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scnsalmost 2 years ago
&gt; From these experiences, I’ve realized that avoiding bad habits is just as important as cultivating good habits.<p>Avoidance rarely works i think. I&#x27;d say replacing negative habits with positive ones is a better long term strategy.<p>Can recommend the App Habitica for this, free and open source. There are Android and iOS clients for it. Makes habits dailies and todos more fun.<p>Not affiliated, only fixed an accessibility issue once.<p><a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;habitica.com" rel="nofollow noreferrer">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;habitica.com</a>
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phoe-krkalmost 2 years ago
The original title is &quot;Excellence is a habit, but so is failure&quot; and I think it reflects the contents of the post somewhat better. A short but insightful piece, thank you for posting.
blueyesalmost 2 years ago
I find Andreas&#x27;s short non-technical posts to be fairly unenlightening, and am consistently surprised to see them attract so much attention on HN. The information value here is low.
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tristoralmost 2 years ago
Agreed, I have a history of being a bit of a shopaholic (and being overweight). I&#x27;ve vacillated between periods of being debt-free and periods of indebtedness, I&#x27;ve vacillated between periods of being in relatively good shape and periods of weight gain. None of these circumstances, good or bad, happened overnight, they were the accumulation of many small daily decisions, often over years.<p>When I was in the peak shape of my life (178 and stacked), it was following being in the worst condition in my life (315), after more than 7 years of constant careful attention to my calorie intake, every other day exercise, and meticulously recording it all so I could keep myself honest. It didn&#x27;t evaporate overnight either, I was able to maintain a good state of health without being so controlled while I was traveling, but once the pandemic happened and I became sedentary my loss of control over my eating caught up to me over the next 14 months and I gained nearly 40 pounds back prior to getting myself back under control. Now I&#x27;m on that journey again back to a healthier weight.<p>The things we do every day, the small choices we consistently make, these form the habits of our lives. I have good habits and I have bad habits, and it&#x27;s a consistent struggle for me (and likely everyone) to overcome our bad habits and turn them into good habits. Some of these habits, including my relationship with food, came from my environment as a child, so the work of a lifetime forming them is often difficult to overcome, but it&#x27;s never impossible.
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florgalmost 2 years ago
The article also reminded me of this Charlie Munger quote:<p><pre><code> “It is remarkable how much long-term advantage people like us have gotten by trying to be consistently not stupid, instead of trying to be very intelligent.” </code></pre> Sometimes not doing something stupid is at once easier and harder than trying to get into a good habit.
lo_zamoyskialmost 2 years ago
Indeed. And I think a good term here is &quot;moral failure&quot;, which is exactly what the traditional meaning of &quot;sin&quot; is, i.e., doing something you shouldn&#x27;t, that you <i>know</i>, to some degree, that you shouldn&#x27;t (culpability is determined by the degree to which you understand you are doing something wrong, since understanding is a prerequisite for consent). And small sins are gateways to still greater sins. Indulge them enough, rationalize your indulgence, and you will slowly habituate indulgence and corrupt yourself and shift your moral Overton window. You become what you repeatedly do.<p>Sinning, in fact, corrupts the <i>intellect</i> and so it quite literally dulls your mind to reality over time. Why? Because in order to choose against what you <i>know</i> is the good decision, you have to turn your mind <i>away</i> from reality, from the truth. Do this often enough and it becomes a <i>habit</i> of blinding the mind to enable doing what you shouldn&#x27;t. A blinded mind is degraded, worse at grasping reality, and this makes it even easier to commit still greater evil as it has become worse at determining what is objectively good. A downward spiral.<p>This is why a habit of self-discipline is important. What we call &quot;self-denial&quot; is really the practice of depriving yourself of what you desire that you know you should not desire inappropriately. The obvious example here is food, but it applies generally. Food, <i>as such</i>, is good. However, if I <i>know</i> that I&#x27;ve eaten enough, but an unruly desire for food surfaces, perhaps for food I know is bad for me, denying or repressing that desire is good. One of the purposes of fasting is actually the disciplining of the appetite for food. Consistent practice of self-denial has the effect of regulating the appetite and strengthening the dominion of reason over it, which develops one&#x27;s integrity. Over time, that unruly desire, ruled over and purified by reasoned discipline, will better conform to the rational order, i.e., what is objectively good. Note how people who indulge their hunger against their own good only become more voracious eaters. They may even become <i>disordered</i> eaters (e.g., bulimia). Rewarding an inordinate (or disordered) desire only reinforces it.<p>Now consider how vicious, destructive, and irrational our consumerist culture is. It thrives on mindless and degrading indulgence of any and all desires. This is not the way.
alexmolasalmost 2 years ago
This is the classical 1.01**365=37 but 0.99**365=0.02. I guess the difficult part is to detect where is this missing 1%.
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slashdevalmost 2 years ago
Jocko Willink has a great quote on this subject:<p><pre><code> Rome wasn&#x27;t built in a day. Everyone knows that. It took hundreds of years for Rome to reach its peak. But Rome also didn&#x27;t fall in a day. It also took time, hundreds of years, for Rome to decay and fall apart. </code></pre> He goes on to say that each day we&#x27;re either improving or decaying, either getting a little better or getting a little worse. Those little things add up over time to make a big difference in our lives.
musebox35almost 2 years ago
This seems like a specific application of the &quot;inverted thinking&#x2F;inversion&quot; mentality. I once came across a post on this but can not find it now. I think it was about this article: <a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;fs.blog&#x2F;inversion&#x2F;" rel="nofollow noreferrer">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;fs.blog&#x2F;inversion&#x2F;</a><p>Edit - Or this one: <a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;jamesclear.com&#x2F;inversion" rel="nofollow noreferrer">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;jamesclear.com&#x2F;inversion</a>
lionkoralmost 2 years ago
I&#x27;ve been watching Andreas&#x27; YouTube channel since very early on, and had some short interactions with him in his comment section, and I really believe that every one of the videos where he sits in his car and talks made a difference for me. They taught me a lot - and of course, after tens or hundreds of hours of watching him write code, my C++ looks quite similar to his.
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999900000999almost 2 years ago
The biggest source of drama in my life has been other people.<p>Particularly other people who aren&#x27;t living right. Past 25 and doesn&#x27;t have or trying to get a stable job. Carefully evaluate if you want that person in your life.<p>Misery loves company, the wrong type of people will bring you down and laugh when they do so.<p>Likewise, people with stable lives can and often will lift you up.
jschveibinzalmost 2 years ago
Potentially interesting to some readers:<p>“The Handbook of Self-Regulation”, Baumeister and Vohs<p><a href="http:&#x2F;&#x2F;ndl.ethernet.edu.et&#x2F;bitstream&#x2F;123456789&#x2F;28342&#x2F;1&#x2F;162.pdf.pdf" rel="nofollow noreferrer">http:&#x2F;&#x2F;ndl.ethernet.edu.et&#x2F;bitstream&#x2F;123456789&#x2F;28342&#x2F;1&#x2F;162.p...</a>
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vrnvualmost 2 years ago
Avoidance of something deprives us of the experience we might gain from it. I don&#x27;t believe that avoiding everything we might consider &quot;bad&quot; is generally a good practice. However, I am not suggesting that we should try everything we consider as &quot;bad&quot; either.<p>When people talk about excellence, productivity, and performance, they often draw conclusions based on the final outcomes. However, these conclusions cannot be reached without encountering mistakes along the way.<p>As the Greeks said, the golden mean is the desirable point.
tgvalmost 2 years ago
That title: how is excellence a habit? You can&#x27;t excel without consistent practice (unless it&#x27;s a completely new field, possibly), but that doesn&#x27;t make it a habit. The reverse doesn&#x27;t hold. While failure may also be lack of habit.<p>Clickbait is a habit, I suppose.
ergonaughtalmost 2 years ago
The habit to form is “making wise choices”. We dramatize and complicate this mostly because it is stimulating to do so, which gets reinforced via confirmation bias, cognitive dissonance, etc. We also seem to enjoy moralizing what is “wise” for other people more than keeping our attention where it belongs.<p>It can be as basic as forming the habit of asking whether you’ll be thankful you did XYZ when you’re at the end of your life. Sometimes that’s going to be a “yes”, even for “unwise” choices, but most people who actually engage with this will find that most of the honest answers are “no”.<p>It’s not new or revolutionary or particularly insightful or easily productized so it keeps having to be rediscovered.
pseudostemalmost 2 years ago
Since a lot of people are talking about themselves so openly, I feel a compulsion too.<p>I hide behind perfection. Learning maths, programming, sports, health.<p>Of course I need a perfect OS, perfect programming paradigm, perfect book, the best music learning method, greatest body improvement program.<p>Perfect is the enemy of good. It&#x27;s something I grapple with on a daily basis.
nektroalmost 2 years ago
&quot;The master has failed more times than the beginner has even tried.&quot;
zh3almost 2 years ago
&gt; We often hear that making small incremental improvements every day can lead to great things. This popular piece of advice rings true...<p>A journey of 10,000 miles starts with a single step.<p>You can only cross a chasm with a mighty leap.<p>YMMV.
totetsualmost 2 years ago
The discussion on a similar article last month was interesting <a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;news.ycombinator.com&#x2F;item?id=36195105">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;news.ycombinator.com&#x2F;item?id=36195105</a>
vkolencikalmost 2 years ago
The same point expressed beautifully by Jocko Willink: <a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.youtube.com&#x2F;watch?v=TyMEQMt6yAw">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.youtube.com&#x2F;watch?v=TyMEQMt6yAw</a>
23B1almost 2 years ago
&#x27;Failure&#x27; is when the whole system crashes. Andreas is really talking about small setbacks that lead to failure.<p>And I think its better to embrace Samuel Beckett&#x27;s mantra: &quot;Try Again. Fail Again. Fail Better.”<p>It&#x27;s arguably the core tenet of agile&#x2F;lean anyway. Measure, learn, <i>improve</i>. If you&#x27;re taking those single steps backwards and using them to make two steps forward, that&#x27;s the opposite of failure.
robinduckettalmost 2 years ago
Positive habit forming is incredibly hard to do. Negative habit forming is easy. Being “aware” of this fact is not enough to prevent bad habit forming.
sphalmost 2 years ago
Timely post. I was planning on spending the day researching gamification applied to healthy habits and&#x2F;or abandoning unhealthy ones.<p>Anyone has any pointer? Bonus if it&#x27;s RuneScape-style gamification (exponential XP curve, rewarding yourself every level up, build on the assumption that growth in life is a <i>very</i> long grind like maxing a RS character, made of small steps)
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skapadiaalmost 2 years ago
I love listening to Guy Raz&#x27;s &quot;How I Built This&quot; podcast - a common element in almost every success story is the number of failures it took to reach success. Failure, the ability to keep working &#x2F; pivot through failures, and being okay with failure seem to be requirements to succeeding.<p>Failure is literally a key ingredient to success.
m3kw9almost 2 years ago
This is the basis of ignorance or no self awareness, you go on autopilot on what feels great at the moment
euixalmost 2 years ago
It&#x27;s very honest of him to breakdown how he makes his living on SerenityOS - really enjoyed that blog post, helps give people an idea of how a very technically saavy person can make it in today&#x27;s world as a &quot;nomad&quot;.
hotdogscoutalmost 2 years ago
I think failure is a better groomer for success than success. Every truly great achievement of my life came from prior humiliation from failure.
adamsmith143almost 2 years ago
Didn&#x27;t Edison fail like &gt;2000 times when creating the lightbulb? Seems like a &quot;habit&quot; of failure... &#x2F;s
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arnejenssenalmost 2 years ago
Excellent!<p>Via negativa is a useful tool. Instead of thinking about what to add, via negativa is about what to remove.
mylonsalmost 2 years ago
the author is describing self medication as incremental failure. i think this is a mindset that can lead to more.<p>in those moments you’re seeking relief, and viewing it as failure can just perpetuate shame and creates a vicious cycle.
desireco42almost 2 years ago
This went dark quickly... I hope author is in good shape and drug free now.
stillbournealmost 2 years ago
Can&#x27;t have excellence without a shit ton of failure
croesalmost 2 years ago
hindsight is 20&#x2F;20
germandiagoalmost 2 years ago
100% agree.
PaulHoulealmost 2 years ago
I think it’s going to come out eventually that obesity is not a failure of willpower but a derangement of your metabolism caused by some environmental chemical such as PFAS, glyphosate, etc.
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wonderwonderalmost 2 years ago
Andrew Tate (I am in no way condoning his character) has an interesting video where he talks about discipline vs motivation. If you need to be motivated to do something then its probably not going to last, discipline is what makes things last. Combined with patience is how we see real change and results. If we wake up at 5am to go to the gym, many of us are motivated when we set the alarm but that motivation is gone when the alarm rings, only discipline can make you get up day after day instead of hitting the snooze button.<p>This applies to all aspects of life. Its the reason so many new years resolutions die after a few weeks. Why diets fail. Why the gym is packed in January and back to normal in March. If you need to be motivated to succeed, you will likely fail, only discipline will get you through both the good and bad times.<p>Discipline is what separates the great from the average or even good.