When I was young I worked at a company that said things like "we are family" and kind of meant it.<p>It wasn't really a good thing unless you were a low performer. We had some people who were hired into jobs they couldn't do well, but they got to keep those jobs because it was like their role in the family. People basically never got fired, including the couple guys in the corner who barely did any work but had been there forever.<p>When money was tight, they didn't do layoffs. They just cut everyone's compensation by the same percentages. Including those people who didn't do much work, because we can't fire family.<p>Modern companies avoid this phrase because it has become so toxic that nobody wants to be associated with it. It's a holdover from old school management who speak in boilerplate platitudes like "fast paced environment" that don't mean anything.
I have seen reports of how things go in "old money" families. It doesn't look at all like the idea we make of families.<p>They have access to vast amounts of resources, but family members don't have free access, far from it. There is council that decides how the funds are allocated, and when family members need some, they need to pitch how they are going to use it, and the expected returns. And if some family members are deemed unworthy, or don't follow some rules they can get expelled and lose access to the familial wealth.<p>So maybe that's what companies mean by "we are family". Or more likely, it is a combination of the perspectives of the modest families with the warmth of the wealthy ones.
This is why I always liked Netflix's outlook (both stated and practiced):<p>We are a sports team, not a family. Perform well and you will be paid well, perform poorly and you will get a nice check to go elsewhere. And sometimes you might perform really well but we just don't need someone with your skills anymore, so we'll still give you nice check to go elsewhere, and that isn't a reflection on your abilities.
My first job was with a "we are a family" company, they used stupid names for the employees internally but also in the job post, together with an emoji spam that couldn't say "how you do fellow kids?" any harder, ask to "see yourself like an entrepreneur" and "be the leader of your own ideas" obviously taking far less than the actual company owners.<p>After a while I had to resign due to mental health problem manifesting as depression and burnout to the point where I couldn't even enjoy my favorite video games. I started therapy which hasn't been going as well as I would like but that's another subject.<p>A month ago I talked to a colleague to see how they're doing. He informed me that another guy left 1 week after I did, but the best part is how he told me that "unlike you at least he gave a 2 week notice". To this day I still wonder if I was really the one unprofessional and that I should just force myself to "work". And I use quotes because I don't know how anyone would expect someone who literally have to force himself to get up from the bed and brush his teeth to be productive. I'm not the kind of person who sees himself as unprofessional and if I had no health problems interrupting my daily life I'd have no issues upholding the 2 week notice.<p>Turns out there is such a thing as a toxic family.
This is well written and I agree that family is a very imperfect analogy for a working relationship. At the same time, some work situations are more or less family-like and it still pays to look for the "more."<p>I've been lucky that 4 companies I've worked at in my life so far have been very "employee forward" - creating scenarios of employee growth and engagement (vs putting employees in the seat of powerless cogs). All 4 companies have had a layoff of some sort for various reasons (business line shutdown, covid business hit, interest rate hit, grew too fast - respectively) and I have been affected by one of the layoffs (the other one, I left right before employees were bought out) but I am still happy to have worked there vs anywhere else because of these factors.<p>"Family" doesn't mean employing you past the point it makes sense, it's more about how you're related to when you're here. Are you encouraged to grow, to make connections, are you paid well, does the company try to give you good benefits, etc. You want a place that does all of that. You don't have to call it "family" - but it's a totally different vibe from a sweatshop.
Mildly amusing, and yes - the whole "this company is a family" schtick is overplayed by companies. I never say that at my company - instead the employees often say it back to me, which I feel is much more culturally "real" than me saying it.<p>At one company party, the employees were going around the room telling me how nice it was to work for me (which is very kind of them). The last guy sheepishly shrugged and said, "I don't want to be standoffish but I felt this way at my last company, and they let me go. This is just a job to me." I felt like this is overall the most healthy attitude to have when thinking about work, and frankly to hear it out loud was refreshing. I love that kind of honesty.
Companies with these terms in job postings are usually a red flag, but don’t be too judgmental:<p>>We are family!<p>No boundaries, underpaid, nepotism, etc.<p>>Fast paced working environment!<p>Mostly toxic environment.<p>>Attention to details!<p>“Big boss” will scream at you for silly things.<p>>Will require working overtime if needed!<p>Self explanatory.<p>>Fun loving, company culture activities, etc.<p>Your typical kindergarten office activities, you can’t refuse either.<p>I will also add this but not always the case<p>>open office style<p>Yeah, nope!
"Now kids, I know we made <i>more</i> money than we did last year, but we didn't make <i>as much more money</i> this year as we did more money over the previous year. And so, unfortunately, we had to kick Grandpa to the curb."
A different take on the same joke: <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gnWutAm4En4">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gnWutAm4En4</a>
Actually, having integrity usually means being clear with people about budgetary decisions. The manipulative games just makes a firm look like its run by a cult of cons.<p>Talent cutbacks are a loss of invested resources, and signals a failure to predict market trends. Sure it can also bump a laggard stock short-term, but ultimately signals other internal structural issues.<p>Good luck, =)
I thought after Netflix's culture deck and Reed Hoffman's book Alliance, it would be pretty clear that a company is not a family. It could an alliance, it could be a professional sports team, or it could be some business entity, but definitely not a family. I particularly like the concept of alliance, as it reflects the reality. Well, I guess the memo is not as well known as I thought.
The problem with this and many companies trying to be family etc, is that they completely misunderstand what a family is.<p>Most think a family is a group where people love each other and care for each other. This is wrong, love and affections are symptoms of a healthy family, you can love and care for your friends, you don’t have a family with them. You can actually not really like spending time with many people in your family, but you are still a part of a functioning family (many such cases). In extreme dysfunction, individuals in a family face abuse but for all our intuition they still are a part of a family until the state intervenes.<p>To this one might say a family is then bonds that occur due to blood relations between its members. This again is a symptom, children in an adoptive family still constitute a family.<p>So what exactly is a family? A family is a binding contract where individuals agree to stay together regardless of the circumstances. In the past this contract was enforced to death out of necessity, now this contract is enforced out of necessity till the child becomes 18 generally. There may be hatred, sickness, or a litany of other disturbances but the individuals still stick by each other. This by definition is something a company cannot recreate (without coming awfully close to slavery), and thus it is hopeless for a company to try to aim to be your family. You can leave when you want and they can let you go when they want. That simply is not the same bond as a family.
It is a joke, and funny. But not entirely sure this is un-realistic in todays world.<p>or
"As you know, Grandma has Long Covid. With her reduced efficiency, and diminishing ROI, tough choices have to be made"<p>> Edit. Not sure why the negative feedback. We all know this is satire and a joke right?
This is beautiful.<p>Many years ago, I learned that "we are a family here" is a red-flag phrase that is indicative of that being a poor place to work.
Disregarding the biological aspects, I think the problem is "families" don't care about people, it's a group of individuals who, through deeply caring about each other, create this thing we've labelled a family. I've definitely had glimpses of this with some work relationships, but it had nothing to do with the company.
It's coming from a different topic, but I like a relevant quote from (the excellent) Dahlia Lithwick on her podcast <i>Amicus</i> (<<a href="https://overcast.fm/+Don0hUpKc" rel="nofollow noreferrer">https://overcast.fm/+Don0hUpKc</a>>):<p>>Being in a family relationship at work never redounds to the benefit of the children
I love reading the bizarre screeds that companies put on their websites as a mission statement. Once I saw a company website shouting that they had a “relentless obsession with customer satisfaction.” I was like, take a deep breath Bob. You’re gonna burst a blood vessel.
several years ago I became an "ultra high net worth individual" (through unexpected events involving a car accident and an inept (but very large) insurance company, and with the help of my closest family members I/we decided (for legal reasons) what was to be done with my wealth in the event of my death. Deciding which family members (I have a pretty big family, if I count aunts, uncles, cousins, but only two grandparents left) to whom I would want to leave what amounts of that wealth was very surreal. Kind of felt like putting monetary values on family, which I guess in a sense it literally was.
Had someone try to recruit me last week with the phrase “it’s like a family.” Kids… if you hear this phrase, run away. Likewise, if anyone ever calls you a “company man” consider whether it’s a similar ploy to manipulate your emotions.
The whole premise of comparing a company to a family is not only flawed. It's just straight up incorrect/wrong. Very little about companies and the way they run and operate looks remotely like a family.
This reminded me of a sketch made by Studio C: <a href="https://youtu.be/EmY2b-i-NpE" rel="nofollow noreferrer">https://youtu.be/EmY2b-i-NpE</a>
I especially like the very American "I ask that you refrain from discussing your termination with any social contacts made through your membership in the family [...] Failure to comply may result in your severance being terminated early or withheld entirely."<p>In (most of ?) Europe, this severance is law and not debatable (as discovered by Musk recently), so this sentence would be outright illegal. You can talk about your salary with anyone you want, discuss it with your colleagues, that's even mandatory for mass-layoffs (through unions and/or elected representatives).<p>You should fight for some more rights, sometime <3