Hey everyone. Here's the long story short, perhaps some of you can relate:<p>I'm a 31 year old, recently single, long time programmer. For the sake of this post, humor me and assume that I am at least above average when it comes to engineering. I've been passionate about it since high school, have had a wide variety of projects, never give up, have a track record of success, etc.<p>Over the last few years I've built up my current humble project into a steady little business which nets me some steady income with little of my time required any more. Let's say roughly $5,000/mo clean - enough to live in many parts of the US (currently I'm in Southern California).<p>After months of reflection, therapy, etc etc, I've come to believe that a physical and social job would do me a world of good. I.E. not one where I'm completely alone at my computer for hours, days, months on end.<p>I've thought about becoming a firefighter (overcorrection?), a pool guy (seriously), an online teacher (teaching programming from my own perspective) etc etc.<p>As you can see, I'm fairly confused. So, I'm casting this note over a shoulder into the HN wishing well and wishing that one of you fine friends happens to stumble upon this.<p>Any ideas?<p><3 - Mike
Great suggestions so far. Here are some of my ideas:<p>Landscape designer: There is a lot to learn about various plants, climate zones, etc. I am learning for our home but feeling overwhelmed. We are considering hiring a consultant and probably would do actual yard work myself. But there are a lot of landscaping companies that will do everything for you.<p>Realtor: I have real estate license, you meet a lot of people, explore new areas, learn about so many things. It was really enjoyable experience without being pushy salesperson as I didn’t need money. I stopped as most of work happen in evenings and weekends, and as a dad I felt it was not fair to my kids.<p>Handyman: Along the same lines as landscaping but probably more in demand. I personally rather do work outside.<p>Portrait photography: It has a lot of competition but also very rewarding and not as stressful as wedding photography. You get explore new places for the shoots. And it is very fulfilling to make people happy with your photos.
Maybe start some sort of trade / manual labor business, and do it with the grace and elegance of a software engineer.<p>E.g., offer as much in the way of online signup / online service requests as possible. Don't make horrid, bizarre websites. Don't make people call you on the phone -- or worse, wait for you to call them -- in order to get a decent estimate of cost and/or when you're going to show up. Include things like DoorDash, to show me on a map where you are when you're headed to my house, so that if I have to meet you, I don't have to putter around for an hour wondering when you're going to show up.<p>And then, of course, do the actual work well and with excellence.<p>Could be any number of specific lines of work -- lawn care, plumbing, heating/cooling, water services. If you want to leave California, snow removal.
You are in a unique situation. You're both financially free and without domestic ties. Your best bet is to try a few different things first before you decide where you want to land. Don't think it too long. It's possible to overthink it and do nothing. Try different things but don't be quick to quit. One of the issues with your situation is that if you get a bit frustrated you'll be quick to quit. All jobs have their points of frustration but that does not mean you should quit and move on. Before you start, decide how long you'll try something before you quit and stick to your decision.<p>Job satisfaction is key. I hear good things about Physical Therapist. Think about it.
Just became recently single myself and have been lost, though during my lost phase, I acquired two properties and turned my home into a rental. I've been successful with tenants at my two properties, but have yet to get great tenants into my home.<p>I'd suggest not doing anything rash like quitting your job or switching careers unless you are at a crossroad and ready to make the switch, such as a job that just let you go. Therapy was a great option. I wish I opted for it but instead, I had family and friends and up until today, which is the last day I will be "related to her by law", I didn't want to let her go, but I've come to peace since it is now a reality.<p>You are a free man currently and can do anything you want. Don't rush into another relationship. Learn more about who you are, what you want, and what you don't want. Make time to exercise.. commit to an hour a day. I have to admit, I haven't been great at it, often having severe anxiety, and I think it was because I was left in a house full of memories for the past 2 years, just drowning in reminders, while fearing going outside.<p>My brother called me with an opportunity to run one of his businesses across the country, so I'm headed to try that out for a few months and hoping it goes well. He's a bit of a hardass and wants everyone to be exactly like him, so I'm hoping it does last, but we'll see!<p>Go to a movie. See what events are around your town and go to them. Call up friends you neglected while you were in your relationship and ask if they'd like to catch up and actually plan a date. Life is not over. It's still going on.. with or without you.<p>Do what you can to keep your mind off her. Understand you'll go through your series of pain, depression, and acceptance moments. Have a person or two you can trust. You aren't alone in this either.
How about mountaineering, there are qualifications to take and you can take groups hiking and camping as the job. With experience you can also join the mountain rescue. You'll be in nature a lot. Congrats on your project income that is admirable.
I'm a bit younger than you, but I have had a similar realization. I love programming, but sitting around all day at a desk does not seem fun for the next several decades, and really doesn't do my social/mental health much good, despite the amount of money.<p>So, I'm working to become a pilot instead. It's expensive, time consuming, competitive, and probably won't see six figures for half a decade or more. But, it's a heck of a lot more meaningful than sitting at my desk all day.<p>Just thought I'd share my situation and solution since it's relatively similar. All the best.
Also a long time programmer. I worked in a maintenance shop for 7 years. I loved it; welding, fixing appliances, operating equipment. I've also jumped on small fishing vessels for friends who are fishermen in various fisheries.<p>Maintenance shops are everywhere and give you a 9-5. Fishing is on the coast and gives you a highly a non-standard mostly summer/fall schedule.<p>Both are an absolute blast when you're with the right people. But then again, nearly everything is like that.
1) Hopefully your income stream will last, but just remember that monthly $5K you're counting on might not be around forever. You're probably going to have re-invent yourself multiple times in your life.<p>2) Pick a profession that you might be able to meld with your technical/computer skills and interests in the future. Maybe you'll have an idea for a future startup that combines your job that other people without the tech background haven't recognized.
I once spent a couple months building houses with a construction crew, and that was both physical and educational. I still enjoy walking into houses and buildings, looking around, and knowing how they're put together. It's like I can see through walls now, to the frame and studs. Getting out in the sun and doing physical labor was also refreshing and renewing, if also tiring. And no one will tell you it sounds like you've got a case of the Mondays.
Physical jobs involve hands-on work and direct interaction, which can be satisfying. However, they can be tiring and limit flexibility. Online jobs offer freedom in terms of location and hours, but they might lack personal interaction and require self-discipline. Your choice depends on your preferences and lifestyle. And i would prefer physical job over online job as the physical job is full of entertainment and adventure, if you are on a good position.
in your experience programming, how much of that has been solopreneuring versus working for an organization in an office?<p>entrepreneurship can be energizing and empowering and liberating and all those great things, but it can also be isolating. there are certainly downsides when it comes to working for another company, but a few upsides too:<p>- more social by default -- especially if you're actually in an office<p>- easier to casually experiment with moderate changes to job focus, e.g. "hey manager i've been doing heads-down engineering a while and i'd like to transition into product management"<p>- secure, compartmentalized base: $5k/mo without much input is killer, but it's not enough to obviate financial concerns (especially in southern california). you could easily be making more than double that on salary, and with that kind of base it's much easier to finance even fairly expensive social and physical activities in your off time (which could include volunteer firefighting, tutoring, a couple shifts waiting tables on weekends, etc)<p>being a fisherman would be awesome, but is it conservatively worth seven figures over the next two decades? for some, yes. for you?<p>if you're simply not going to be happy/fulfilled/<insert personal success metric here> doing work that leverages your current skillset, you probably have to find work that does. but your current skillset is quite high value, you're young, and compound interest is no joke. i would make a serious effort towards finding a compromise between current earnings and social/physical outlets before throwing the baby out with the bathwater and becoming a mechanic.<p>that said, spending a few months bartending on a tropical island somewhere might help you figure it out either way.
Wait tables. You don't need much experience, it can be fun, your glutes and hamstrings will thank you, and it's not bad money if you can manage to get into a good place. And it will make you cooler, as service industry types are one of the hippest slices of society. The downside is that it can suck you into a nightcrawler lifestyle.
Look at fedex/ups/maybe usps jobs near you. Package handling at a sorting facility is a physical job, and should be easy to get with no experience. Let them know you can type, and you might get on SWAK (scan, weigh, and key), which is a bit easier.<p>Doing deliveries is more social, but there's a lot of deadline stress.
I am a programmer, outdoor plumber and currently training to go to selection for Wildland firefighter.<p>If you like being active and more physical - just look at what interests you in terms of what you want to do physically and try to match it with something that can yield an income or trade.
When/if I leave tech, I intend to become a union electrician.<p>Pay and benefits are reasonable. They seem to be in high demand in my area (Pacific NW) and the work is physical without being so grueling that it destroys one's body.
Have you thought about becoming a mechanic? It's physical enough, a highly useful skill for your own use, and engages problem solving that isn't too dissimilar from debugging.
Maybe take up a team sport, or martial art. Or do some physical labor part time, to see if you actually want to do it full time, or if this is just an itch you can scratch on the weekends