Slow thinking HN members, what are some strategies you've use to overcome and compensate for the lack of quick thinking.<p>E.g. I found I'm great at analysis or putting together elaborate argument but if I'm in a situation where I need to make a quick decision or get in actual argument I lose all of that capacity and usually drop to the level of IQ 85 if I/m to be judged by the outcomes. Nevertheless a slow thinker does have that potential there he's jut not able to tap into it if he falls into my category. In martial arts, rehearsing overcomes a lot of that - what has worked in real life for you?
This is something that's easy to have an opinion on so you're going to get buried.<p>I'll do my best to make a high-signal comment here, but it will be drowned by all the other replies, which also likely touch on these points.<p>First, "slow-thinking" is really just a different way of expressing your thinking and you should begin by leaning into it rather than leaning away. Take time, allow yourself to pause to collect your thoughts. People often interpret quietness (not filler) as intelligence and maturity (because usually it is). Alternatively <i>not</i> answering is also valid.<p>Second, as a person who is generally regarded as quick-witted and sharp, most of that sharpness comes from either having a few pre-known responses to ideas or anxiously revising situations in my head ahead of time. This is, generally, a <i>bad thing</i> because it means I have made decisions on how I will respond to things without all of the information (as some will come over during conversation). Methodically thinking things through, fresh, is probably the only realistic way to be open minded.<p>Finally, do your best to avoid situations where a "quick decision" is needed; this is good advice even for "quick thinkers". Fast decisions are often poor ones - the counterpoint to that is dragging something out over many weeks or across many meetings - but putting yourself in a situation where the unknowns become knowns or the scope of the landscape and weight of the decision can be properly assessed is important. What's better is that you will likely be able to have a better paper trail for this.<p>One absolutely final piece of advice: Avoid using the word "slow", use "deliberate" instead.
Sorry OP, for a bit of a diversion. I notice a lot of folks saying that "quick wit" or fast thinking or whatever, is just advance preparation (perhaps subconscious) or a memorized script, etc. It may be, but for those who think it always is, it definitely isn't.<p>My son is/was quite bright - reading at 3, reading the Economist and understanding 20% of it at 5, teaching himself calculus at 7. He got <i>terrible</i> grades in school maths, and his teachers thought he was lazy because he so obviously understood the material.<p>With some cognitive testing at age 6, he was placed "somewhere over 2nd stdev" (they just stop after a bit) for most cognitive subjects... but when taking response time tests he would drop to 2nd percentile. Second percentile! You could ask him to to find the root of a simple quadratic, and he would think about it and get the answer, then ask him to name the first five even numbers, and he would take about the same amount of time. His processing speed was (and is) just slow. In school, many marks went towards "flash tests" and speed competitions in math. He couldn't get through the first half of the tests, he'd run out of time. He's in third year honours maths at uni now, favourite topic is abstract algebra. They give him more time on tests.<p>My point is that this is real for some people, it's not just practice or technique or rehearsing.
Sometimes what people think is quickness is actually extensive prep. I had a 30 minute meeting the other day to ask a team to do something I didn’t think they would want to do. It ended up going really smoothly and they just took my word for it, but had they not, I spend several hours preparing for that meeting, gathering data, preparing charts to illustrate the data, thinking of the possible objections and responses to said objections.<p>Many years ago my family was trying to see Letterman in NYC. I wasn’t old enough, and we knew that going in. The night before, when I was supposed to be sleeping, I was going over what I thought I might need to know. When was my fake birthday, why don’t I have an ID, etc. On the day, I was asked these questions by security and gave a quick and natural answer. Afterword my dad commented that I was really quick and good at thinking on my feet, but the truth was that I prepared.
I have taken a properly administered IQ test. I scored 135 in one area and 89 in another. My main issue is I have very poor working memory. Luckily, we have technology to compensate for our deficiencies.<p>* I write everything down on calendars, to do lists, planners etc.
* I have a smart speaker in every room so I can capture pieces of information as soon as I know about them.
* I use many different kinds of timers to remind me of tasks, or to switch tasks from one to another.
* I use checklists to help complete daily processes.<p>The best thing you can do is acknowledge your weaknesses, reflect on situations where you struggle and find specific techniques or processes that improve the outcome for you. It won't happen overnight. Good luck!
As other commenters have mentioned, I’ve noticed that people generally tend to fall into one of two groups: those who think out loud and those who process internally. (And I don’t know if it’s a coincidence or not, but almost all of the managers I have had in my career have been the former.)<p>I tend to think internally, and while I usually have a clear vision in my head of how a system works, if I try to translate that mental model on-the-fly into an explanation for others, it typically comes out as an incoherent jumble of loosely related phrases.<p>To that extent, I much prefer written communication. It gives me time to convert the thoughts in my head into English, and I typically iterate on what I’ve written down quite a few times until I’m satisfied with it (including Hacker News comments for example).<p>The one exception to being a “slow thinker” is if the discussion involves a topic I know very well and someone says something that is incorrect or inconsistent. While I can’t necessarily articulate my own ideas immediately on the spot, I do seem to be able to quickly identify and explain flaws in deductive reasoning or come up with examples that highlight inconsistencies.<p>I’m not sure I necessarily like that my brain defaults to looking for flaws in arguments rather than reasons to support them, but my own internal process of generating ideas consists of a cycle of proposing an idea to myself followed by immediately trying to find ways to shoot it down (such that whatever ideas survive this mental gauntlet are decent ones I guess). But I think this approach had the unfortunate side effect of optimizing the “quick thinking” part of my brain into that of an inconsistency-detector rather than a rapid brainstorming mechanism.
Slow thinker here.<p>When asked a question, I can give a great answer 10 minutes; an hour; a day later. It's not a full day of active thinking, but time is needed to "stew" in my mind for a while. So I give my best answer in the moment (which might be "I don't know"). Then I follow up with my awesome answer whenever it comes.<p>Slow thinking makes conversation more difficult. Anything beyond 1:1 conversation usually means the conversation flies faster than I can think. I'm OK with that and just enjoy listening to the conversation and occasionally contributing. On rare occasion this makes other people uncomfortable. However I have generally surrounded myself with people who accept my quiet nature.<p>Also slow thinking comes with its advantages. Embrace those. Despite being a slow thinker, my client repeatedly tells me that I deliver high-quality output really fast. He's always asking how I come up with these amazing ideas.<p>---<p>Derek Sivers says he's "a very slow thinker:"<p>> When someone wants to interview me for their show, I ask them to send me some questions a week in advance...<p>> People say that your first reaction is the most honest, but I disagree. Your first reaction is usually outdated. Either it’s an answer you came up with long ago and now use instead of thinking, or it’s a knee-jerk emotional response to something in your past.<p>> When you’re less impulsive and more deliberate like this, it can be a little inconvenient for other people, but that’s OK. Someone asks you a question. You don’t need to answer. You can say, “I don’t know,” and take your time to answer after thinking. Things happen...<p>HN discussion:<p>- <a href="https://hw.leftium.com/#/item/35039358" rel="nofollow">https://hw.leftium.com/#/item/35039358</a><p>- <a href="https://hw.leftium.com/#/item/17694306" rel="nofollow">https://hw.leftium.com/#/item/17694306</a>
Don't speak.<p>People fill voids and awkward situations by saying stuff, even if that stuff is wrong.<p>It's OK to be quiet. It's also OK to say 'Let me think about that'.<p>Lose some arguments.<p>And unless the situation you are in that requires a quick decision is life or death, it probably doesn't need one.
I was/am a very slow thinker, and I've never met anyone with higher task switching costs, around 15 I learned how to be clever and quick witted.<p>In high school I got really into drama and improv, to succeed at improv AT ALL I had to effectively have to be in an altered mental state. When I am being quick witted my brain is literally functioning differently, there is no truth, no data, no thoughtfulness, it's stream of conscious ejected straight from my brain.<p>Mentally it's not unlike skiing a steep slope but the single internal directive isn't "oh shit, stay up" but "oh shit, entertain", it's not even an active thought per se, just an internal bent.<p>Fortunately my inner dialog and thought life isn't racist, evil or cruel, as no filter is no filter.<p>Before I learned that I had the capacity for this mental modality, I didn't even know it existed, I finally made the break through during "improv training" sessions and the "flight" response that caused me to stutter and choke just spontaneously disappeared, I'm not sure if everyone has the capacity.<p>I usually engage in slow thinking, in highly social situations where I'm "On", it still feels like flying down a ski slope, fun, very mentally "on" and damn scary.
Use asynchronous communications when possible. Ask for things in writing, which moves the conversation to email. Say you have to sleep on big decisions, or need to consult some information you don't have in front of you.<p>Try to be prepared with a decision tree made in advance so you can answer the predictable stuff quickly. And you don't have to think of absolutely everything, but the act of planning will help you be more familiar with the options.<p>Talk out loud. Take the space and time you need to make a decision, and don't try to hide it.
There are a lot of other good answers here. My 2c:<p>People will use all kinds of tactics to get their way. Putting you under time pressure, bombarding you with a stream of precise facts and figures, making you feel slow and stupid and out of sync; these are all just ploys used by a hostile counterparty to influence your decision making.<p>You need to learn to recognize these tactics for what they are and develop counter measures.<p>Some "honorable" counter measures might be: demand to be sent the details in writing and promise a decision in a reasonable amount of time. Buy time by repeating back what they just said to you "to make sure you understand". Ask a lot of clarifying questions. Make your decision conditional ("I'll buy in if you can provide me with data set X that supports your direction"). etc.<p>For less honorable counter measures just think of "bad meeting" tropes. Appeal to authority ("we can't make a decision without person Y here, or without committee Z signing off"). Bike shedding. Circular reasoning. etc. You really shouldn't make a habit of any of these, but sometimes when you're ambushed by a bad faith actor you're gonna need to fight dirty.
Knowing this about yourself and accepting it is already a great win.<p>Lots of good advice here so won’t repeat it. Only thing I have to add is, allow yourself some time to think in front of people. Be ok with a long pause and be assertive in making other people wait for your answer.<p>In a slightly competitive or confrontational situation, typically at work, I go as far as telling people: “hang on a second, let me finish.” Or “you’re bouncing around so much I don’t know what’s actually important” because often someone will keep pushing their agenda and/or cut me off and win social credit from onlookers. So I rebalance that power dynamic.<p>But a softer approach also works of course. “That’s interesting and I have lots to say about it, let me get back to you”
As an engineering manager, I recognize that some people are comfortable talking through things extemporaneously in a 1:1 or a group setting, while others prefer chewing on the problem a bit and crafting their ideas at their own pace.<p>That's why I try to make space for both ends of the spectrum. One of the practices I've had great success with is a weekly update note, where my direct reports have the opportunity to write out their thoughts about how the week has gone and to raise any concerns. There have been too many times to count when a "slow thinker" has identified a problem via that channel that they didn't raise in our conversations, because they felt more comfortable being able to choose their words carefully in an async manner. If I hadn't made space for that kind of communication, I would have lost out on really smart ideas.
1. Prep.<p>2. Bluster while I prep. A lot of quick thinkers are not actually quick thinkers. They are quick responders, using far more words to say just as much, with the filler works frontloaded to give them time. For example:<p>"Now, correct me if I am wrong, and I may be, and this is something to consider, what if we X?" buys you about 5 seconds of time to think. You can say those words in front of pretty much every argument.<p>3. Stop caring. Few quick decisions are actually needed. If my Product Owner is going to make me defend my approach, I just concede the argument and allow the other guy's approach, whether or not it has gaping security holes or will fail in prod. Haven't made a case for anything at work in two years and just make sure everyone whos who did make the screw up.
When I worked in tech, people who were quick thinkers overshadowed everyone else, and it became a kind of machismo. The problem was, just because they were quick thinking didn't mean they were <i>right</i>. Outside of tech, being a more methodical thinker is more accepted and common... the key I've found is to use humor, grace, and humility and play the long game. Demonstrate <i>wisdom</i> over just being quick and clever.
The Veritasium youtube channel has a few interesting videos related to this topic:<p>This one is on IQ: <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FkKPsLxgpuY" rel="nofollow">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FkKPsLxgpuY</a>
Pay attention to the stats on how IQ correlates to success (near the end).<p>This one is about becoming an expert: <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5eW6Eagr9XA" rel="nofollow">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5eW6Eagr9XA</a><p>This one is about someone who just worked harder than everyone else: <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AF8d72mA41M" rel="nofollow">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AF8d72mA41M</a>
Re-iterating what others have commented: quick-wittedness isn't "thinking fast" in the same way as you think slow, it's a different variety of thinking that comes with practice.<p>I've always been a slow thinker, & always discounted quick-wittedness as a skill others had innately. Recently I've found myself being a bit more quick-witted & what's remarkable it's not something I "think" about (at least actively). It's something that comes out from a different place (subconscious?) & does so more & more with practice. E.g. take referential connections: I used to be amazed that people could connect things in conversation <i>so quickly</i> because my mind simply doesn't connect things that quickly - but I think it's more like the pre-connected reference bubbles up from deep in your subconscious pre-made; you don't think about the referential route.
This question speaks to the biggest communications battle I have had for the past 20+ years in my career.<p>I have a coworker that uses his quick talking ability to manipulate, accuse and scam his way through meetings and his daily work. He is management level (so am I) and it's impossible to have reasonable discussions for many reasons.<p>My solution:<p>I graciously communicate in a professional manner, work properly with this person as a normal work flow. I listen and give my feedback and this works really well to make the day go smoothly for both of us and anyone else in the area.<p>After any encounters with this person, I think about what happened, I make some notes about the events (date stamp it as well) and then let it sit in my mind until the next day at a minimum.<p>I have found that after doing this, I realized what really happened, (if I was tricked or manipulated or not) and then I do all of my responses in email.<p>I do not even try to do it verbally. In fact I have told this person and upper management, that I am not comfortable talking about events _because_ I am do not have quick responses to ward off the manipulations (I don't call it this to upper management though).<p>I state plainly that I do not want confrontation, and I just want to do my job, and I get too emotional and can sometimes communicate poorly verbally.<p>This is a reasonable statement, and I no longer have to replay my conversations when things go wrong, because I do it all in writing.<p>This has had the side benefit of causing this bully to back down, because he has relied on hiding behind clever wording and phrasing that I could not counter. And because I am being very open about my responses, he knows he would have to do the same if we wants to respond and his true motivations and intent would be revealed.<p>So I am now simply happier at work. I hope this helps some.
It might help you to think about levels of abstraction rather than speed of thought.<p>Learn to walk up and down an abstraction tree of your thoughts.<p>Quick for me in this context looks like high level conversation without details, so learn to keep things high level, and think in three branches maximum of the first level of that tree.<p>Also find common context, usually this is where I find conversations get lost, sometimes listening and gathering the other person context is way more important that stress yourself to be quick.<p>And just be honest, people appreciate that too.<p>So my "quick" thinking reply to you, are these three branches of a tree that could go wider and deeper but I would start the conversation like this.<p>- Think about abstraction levels rather than speed, one level deep and three branches wide.<p>- Listen to gather common context and fill your gaps.<p>- Be honest
Avoiding situations in which I need to think on the fly. If I'm playing a game, I play a turn based game, not a real time game. Why do what you're bad at and will never be great at?<p>Sadly one of the places where quick wittedness is most essential is face to face social interaction so at some point you just have to bite the bullet and do things you're worse at than others.
The reason to rehearse martial arts is to get in fewer fights. You spar to drive home the point that a fight entails the other person landing punches and all you will walk away with is some bruises.<p>Nobody likes you more because you won the argument. "Yes, and..." is much better tool. Even when dealing with socio-paths because saying one thing and doing another is also useful.<p>What I mean is that what works for me is to realize that my deficit is social skills. The solutions are negotiation and forbearance, not violence.<p>Good luck.
Anki, believe it or not. Anki and sticking with the same small bag of tools.<p>There are quite a few things which are best kept as "fingertip knowledge", even with the assistance of GPT-4.
So, here's what I've found works for me. Picture this: I'm in a meeting, and suddenly I'm put on the spot to make a decision. My mind goes blank, and I start feeling like I've lost half my IQ points. It's frustrating, to say the least.<p>But then I realized something. Just like how martial artists rehearse their moves over and over again until it becomes second nature, I started rehearsing scenarios in my head. For instance, before a big presentation, I'd run through possible questions or objections I might face. It's like mentally preparing myself for battle, but without the black belt.<p>By recognizing when I'm slipping into slow-thinking mode, I can catch myself before I spiral into panic mode. It's all about staying cool, calm, and collected, even when the pressure's on.<p>Breaking tasks down has been a lifesaver too. Instead of tackling a decision head-on, I break it into bite-sized chunks. It's like eating a massive burger one bite at a time. Much more manageable, right?<p>Plus, I'm not afraid to lean on tools and resources. Whether it's jotting down notes or consulting with experts, these little helpers give me the confidence to tackle even the toughest decisions.<p>And hey, slow thinking doesn't mean I'm not sharp. I'm all about continuous learning and improvement. Whether it's doing brain teasers or engaging in a lively debate, I'm constantly flexing those mental muscles.<p>With a bit of rehearsal, mindfulness, and a trusty toolkit, you'll be navigating those fast-paced situations like a pro in no time.
It depends on the context, I guess. I can think of two scenarios where I've encountered this:<p>First, I'm in a scenario where I'm bombarded with new information and asked to provide analysis, or I'm presented with a new problem and asked for a solution. When people ask questions about complex topics, they probably don't expect full, well organized answers immediately. Likely, they expect a conversation. Work the problem with them, just like you would alone, asking questions as necessary. Supplement your working memory by writing things down as you discuss them. People are happy to sit in silence for a minute while you work a problem or make notes, so don't be afraid of silence. This is simply how complex work is done.<p>Second, sometimes you're asked a question where you have all the information to answer it, but you need a minute to gather your thoughts before answering. In such a case, one can be tempted to say "I'll get back to you". A better approach, if you're certain that you can answer the question with a little more time, is to simply talk through your analysis. Your boss asks "What would happen if we did X instead of Y". You need a minute, but he's sitting there, waiting! That's fine, just talk it out! Say, "Hmm. I hadn't considered that. My first thought is Z, but there are a few things to consider. First...". Make notes as you go, if you're still talking about thing A and thing B pops into your head, make a quick note to remind yourself to return to it.<p>A great way to improve on this is to watch other people in meetings. Everyone gets put on the spot. You can learn a lot from seeing how other people handle it.
Some of it is practice and training. I was always a "slow programmer" in the short term. Before I ever practiced algorithmic coding I could do say, fizzbuzz and two sum, but it might have taken me a good ten to fifteen minutes to really think it through, write out the code, and identify any bugs.<p>After I decided to really dive into DS&A and do some interview prep, I really focused on speed and I got <i>so much faster</i>.
Thank you so much for asking such a vulnerable question in a place where people venerate 'smart' and 'fast' people. In truth, we all have strengths and weaknesses and being at peace with that reality allows us the freedom to address issues vs struggling in denial. Learning to 'play the cards you are dealt' without shame or guilt is a super power, imho.<p>We all have our anecdotes about someone that is 'quick on their feet' or 'slow to speak' etc but it wasn't until my daughter was diagnosed with memory and processing issues that it hit home how deeply this can affect people.<p>While doing a battery of tests, it was determined her 'intelligence' was in the 99th percentile, but her processing speed and working memory were in the 25th and 19th percentiles. That represents almost 5 standard deviations between what she understands and how easily she can process it!<p>Seeing how truly intelligent she is, but also appreciating the time it takes time for her to put the pieces together gives me more compassion and patience when I am working with people that process information differently than I do.
Also a slow thinker. I try to make everything asynchronous. In conversations, I let other people talk until my brain has had time to produce something worth communicating. If people ask my opinion before that, I say I'm still thinking about it or I ask questions to get more context and delay needing a decision. Sometimes I start by saying "let me restate what I think the issues are". Often by the time I've talked through the problem, the answer has become clear to me, or at the very least I know what more I need to figure out. I also actually tell people I'm a slow thinker and often say "I'll have to think on that and get back to you". Sometimes that's literally a minute or two later, which must seem strange to them, but that's how my brain works. The results are generally good enough that people think I'm smart regardless, so I try not to worry about it. Possibly there's some anxiety component to the whole thing because not worrying about having the answer in time itself makes it easier to reach an answer.
Speaking from the heart and being well-versed on popular topics. Most people read headlines, not the actual news nor the history of what led up to these events. I tell them what I know based off my experiences or sources. I state facts from studies I've read or heard of. "In my experience..." or "I've read that X is Y."<p>As for arguments, make them try to convince you. Make them come to you. This is power. It's easier win an argument from a defensive stance. Picking apart their attacks is easier than you convincing them. They either see the error in their ways or you will see errors in your own and tell them you'll think about it. For this to work, you will need an open mind.<p>Also, if you have time, prepare as much as you can.<p>People that try to dominate in an argument instead of keeping a pro-social, open-mind only desire to boost their ego, not to truly learn. Avoid these people. Relieve yourself of the insecurity they wreak upon you.
This post is going to get a ton of comments... tomorrow :)<p>I'm also a slow thinker and here somethings that have helped me:<p>1. lean into your strengths. Like you said in your post where you asked for more time for him during tests. Real life is much more negotiable. Ask for time, Ask to think on this and get back, etc.<p>2. Like some of said, prep is helpful. Utilize your super power by taking a look at the material before. This can be intense like when I'm interviewing I really go crazy with prep but it can also be 5mins before the meeting, gathering your thoughts.<p>3. To get better at real time thinking, for me, is taking some lose notes during the meeting.<p>4. Sometimes you have to tune out the presenter. If all they are doing is reading out the slides, I've found ignoring the presenter, and digesting the content on my own is better. Then I come up with question to clarify my understanding, highlight a decision that needs made and my opinion, think about how this may effect other areas, etc.
So called slow-thinking may not be an all around trait, but rather specific mode in some contexts.<p>Do you generally experience slow physiological and neural reactions? In other words is it a 'hardware' limitation?<p>My guess, in your case it may be more about specific contexts. Some topics/domains may not be your forte, so to speak, yet you could be familiar with them enough to get engaged.<p>So a reasonable choice could be not to engage into debates, instead take a role of a talk show host which encourages guests to talk and tell. It's a win-win case, the other side shines, you learn about the person and the topic.<p>Eventually you'd know which topics are "yours". It's not possible to know everything, yet it's very much possible to listen to anything (unless it's a preschooler asking for ice-cream non-stop).<p>Also, exercising your memory may be of great help in life in general. Fast recall saves you more time for processing the information.
Depends on the context. I'm slower than I used to be (aging I suppose), but, uh:<p>1) Prep/rehearsal<p>2) Delay ("I'll have that for you on [later]")<p>3) Snark ("If it doesn't matter let's just flip for it")<p>4) Silence, then spend the next 8 weeks mentally rehearsing and regretting and beating myself up<p>If it's literally just "quick wit", sometimes I have it, sometimes I don't, my wife always destroys me and I can only acknowledge greatness.<p>For myself, outside of prep/rehearsal, I generally only have "quick answers" if it's a situation where I either have a heuristic I trust ("Budget for that department needs to be 20% of top line revenue in most situations"), or a value that makes the decision for me ("We can 10x our profits if we poison these 17 children, should we do it?" has a quick "No").
Releasing the filters. Which can be disastrous in certain situations. I am a very slow thinker always slow on come backs and even slow in video games, anecdotally I was talking to a friend about this the other day how he is able to have `Natural Talent` the way his brain is wired to be quick on his feet in words and strategy.<p>if I had to analyze the way my brain works in communication (I have been diagnosed Autistic) it would be something like: checking my surroundings => filter check => no good => return to start until appropriate outcome/reaction is most likely to occur. I could make a flow chart about it. However when it's raw input, say a reaction to something dangerous I let my brain do it's thing avoiding hazardous situations (Environments, Automobile wrecks, etc...)
I just fundamentally believe that most human traits aren't good or bad, they're situationally appropriate. Healthy integration of your traits means recognizing when your traits are appropriate and putting yourself into those situations, and recognizing when your traits are <i>not</i> appropriate, and leaning on the people in your life who have the traits that <i>are</i> appropriate for that situation.<p>In your case, if you're a slow, methodical thinker, you need to have a few people at hand who are quick thinkers and can make snap decisions and assessments when it's appropriate to do so.<p>I'm a quick, intuitive thinker, and I need people in my life who can slow me down and think through how my intuitions might be wrong.<p>Neither of these is better than the other. Both are needed. Love yourself. :)
Pre-computing responses.<p>If I am to give a presentation or am invited to a meeting I prepare by taking the position of my interlocutor. I write down their arguments. Then I write down my responses.<p>Then the day of the meeting I have prepared responses for what they’re going to say.<p>When I am caught with an argument I hadn’t thought of I pause first. Then I repeat what they said in my own words. And then I use implication to work towards my position.<p>It’s a lot of rehearsal. Like martial arts. The purpose of practice is to relieve the mind when the time comes to act.<p>I’m not afraid to take a moment to consider what is said before responding. Some people who are quick witted or like to talk before they think are disarmed by this. But it can be useful… just try to avoid over-using it or people may get impatient with you.
You don't always need to be the best in all circumstances if you work in a team. A good team (particularly one that gelled) is going to make use of everyone's temperament and skills.<p>For example, in high-pressure situations, such as when the infra is falling down, you might not be the one coming up with immediate mitigations, but you may be starting a reasoned, calm root-cause analysis that is just as important, if not with the same urgency, as mitigations. If you are also methodical in your troubleshooting, you are providing an alternate path to finding the issue that is different from with a more intuitive approach.<p>A colleague willing to let you take the time to hear you out helps out a lot.
I’ve slowly turned from a quick witted guy to a much slower guy. I don’t think it’s a problem actually. My previous quick-witted self was capable of being quick-witted because I made a shit ton of assumptions about the way the world works. Now I’m constantly rethinking and questioning things I wouldn’tve before, which of course makes me a less snappy thinker.<p>The benefits are obvious to me: while I may have presented myself better in the past, I was prioritizing my presentation over being right, and eventually those snappy comments would come back to bite me. Now my life is much more exciting and varied. I find myself learning a lot more and being a lot more excited about the world.
Decision making and arguing are two very different tasks. For decision making I find that asking questions around the subject helps clarify what you're actually trying to achieve with the decision, gives you additional information to work with and a bit of time to think while they're answering.<p>Also a valid response to being asked to make a decision can be "I'll think about it and get back to you" (but always make sure you do get back to them about it)<p>The best advice I've got for most arguments is to not bother. If you've reached the point of arguing then egos are involved and people won't back down even if they realize that they're wrong.
One of the great secrets of jazz improvisation is to learn how not to self-edit. When improvising, you don't have the time to think about what whether you're doing is good or not. You just have to play. In context, over the fretboard, while playing live music, self-editing doesn't bring much extra value.<p>Could that be at the root of your problem? Don't labor over whether what you say is right or not. Just put it out there, and you will be right almost all the time. Everyone understands that quick-thinking produces less accurate results. Be less worried about being wrong. You can always have a slow think afterwards and change your mind.
Fast thinkers will always win in an environment where "knowing the answer" is the criteria for success. The result is that lots of stupid decisions get made. Really stupid decisions. There are corporations where knowing the answer is much more important than thinking and the correct answer.<p>This whole thing of asking people technical questions in interviews is IMHO just stupid. In an interview if you want to know if someone is technically good, have them ask you questions and test your knowledge. Or give them a problem without an easy answer. Why and when would you prefer to use Rust vs JavaScript. Why don't people use 'C' anymore?<p>My advice is: if you find yourself in a "who knows the answer" environment to run like crazy. Corporations use goofy signals. I worked long ago at significant DB company that used the number of hours you worked as a signal for how good you were. Work 9 hours = bad, Work 15 = good. Then they went out of business because it turns out that no one got anything done.<p>I've been thinking about Cargo Cultism quite a bit. Agile used to be an effective way to do things. Now not so much. Did the technique change? No. What happened is that it because the "right answer". People are going through the motions for something they do not understand. Just silliness.<p>Do a start up, consult, anything. If you can think well you have lots of options, but will have to work for them.
If you are smart yet "slow thinking", you may have a minor cognitive difference (disability). It's common. Consider that this supposed "slow thinking" instead could be "slow audio input processing" or similar. Do you have trouble understanding conversation when there is background noise like other conversation?<p>As others have mentioned "pre-thinking" or preparation will be the solution whenever possible.<p>If you suspect a language processing issue, get it confirmed so that you can plan around it.
As I've gotten older I've noticed things that used to just come to me(simple things, like compound boolean statements) now require thought. In addition,I take a lot longer to ingest new info and reason about it.<p>To work around this, I rely more on social skills, a positive attitude, pre-canned responses, and deferral of judgement on technical approaches until I've had time to consider them. (Fortunately my social brain hasn't aged as poorly as my nerd brain)
Being a slow thinker myself, this has been quite an enlightening thread; and a special thank-you to those who alerted me on Derek Sivers, his work seems highly relevant.<p>But this whole topic raises an important question: is there any way to check whether someone is a slow thinker, e.g. when interviewing people for work? It would be great if one could easily determine if someone doesn't have the required knowledge or is simply slow to formulate the answers.
You can improve your quickness with experience in a particular area.<p>I am not very good at chess. If I need to make a decision on a move, I will think slowly and deeply. In the end, I often make a move because I feel I used up too much time, and not because I think it is a good move.<p>There are some domains where I am very experienced. When I listen to someone's question, many possible solutions come to mind. As the person continues to explain the situation, some of the solutions are eliminated as they don't apply. When the person finished speaking, I have either a possible solution for their problem (assuming they provided adequate context) or some followup questions. In either case, I am able to offer a quick response or followup question, and may come across as quick-witted.<p>I don't think I am quick witted. I am able to listen and process at the same time. I have a considerable library in my head on some subject, and can navigate it while someone is speaking.<p>This varies from subject to subject, and largely depends on the complexity of the question or decision. The more I know about something, and the simpler the situation, the quicker comes a response. To someone who has less experience, this may seem like a quick wit.
> what has worked in real life for you?<p>Asking questions. It gives me more time to think and more information with which to come to a conclusion. I think a lot of what is sometimes called slowness is really analysis paralysis. Not caused by lack of thinking, any more than gridlock is caused by lack of cars. As you know, the person who makes confident, knee-jerk decisions looks highly competent, but usually isn't.
I hear this argument a lot from people who don't consider themselves quick thinkers and honestly it sounds a bit like cope. Many such people might be confusing perseverance for skill in analysis. Not saying that's you, OP. But many people make similar claims.<p>That said, I don't think it's set in stone. As someone quick on their feet, I can tell you that it feels like flow state. I don't think it's innate, so with practice you can become just like the other jokesters at work. Also try to loosen up. Anxiety is anathema to a quick wit.<p>When I notice smart people appear to be slow thinkers, it's actually still obvious that they're fully engaged but that they have recessed themselves a bit in their minds. They are processing everything but for some reason feel there is a cost to start speaking so they don't jump the gun. It's not a terrible quality. So if you're a solid thinker people will still see it, don't worry about appearing like a midwit if you're not. Otherwise your anxiety will eat you up.
I don't know how I ended up as a slow thinker but here I am. I compensate my lack of quick-wittedness by preparing, other times I just ask people to send me the stuff they need and want instead, that way I can take my time and have everything in control.<p>I hope this is something I can train away though, because thinking slow in-front of others is kinda embarrassing.
There are times in life when you have to make a quick decision and that is genuinely hard.<p>For the times in life when someone wants a quick decision, instead learn a few canned and polished responses that give you a few minutes to decide how you want to answer.<p>Just because someone wants a quick decision doesn’t mean they deserve more than a quick response.
I’m fairly quick but the first thing out of my mouth is rarely correct.<p>I’ve learned to tone that down by not responding immediately with an answer. My immediate response is almost always a set of considerations, and then I walk through my internal thought process with whoever I’m answering.<p>This does a few things, it respects the other person who you are talking to, as they have likely thought about it too and for longer, so might have some deeper insight. Secondly it prevents you from saying one thing out of nowhere and backtracking, preventing confusion/frustration where you contradict yourself. People have a lot more confidence in the person who is very clear and has fewer instances of jumping from one solution to a different one.<p>I would say change nothing but do learn to express your inner monologue clearly. I often do that by making notes as one would in debate (on paper or mentally).
In addition to other great (and not so great) advice here, consider testing for ADHD, if you haven’t already. I finally got tested and diagnosed pretty late in life, and started taking Adderall. It helps somewhat. In my brain, the noise made it difficult to focus on conversations, even 1x1, and part of that noise was constantly gaming out potential responses in real time. Now I am still slow, but have an easier time holding on to the conversation thread, and so pulling out an appropriate response from my memory. I still overprepare for every conversation, and try to have organized notes when I can. My patient wife got used to me saying that I need time to think through something. I then make a spreadsheet of potential conversation branches and decision options, and we end up having a much more productive conversation.
I don't do anything to compensate because I don't view it as a deficiency. If anything, I'm often asking/telling people to slow down. Spewing a bunch of half baked word vomit isn't impressive to me. I've done fine in life, I'm satisfied with the outcome of my approach.
No joke: talk to yourself in private. About everything. I routinely talk myself through technical problems, new ideas, etc. I spend most of my working time alone and doing this has not only improved my work significantly, it's made communicating face-to-face much smoother.
One of the smartest and most respected people I know is someone who hardly says anything. He can sit in a meeting with 15 people, 5 of whom are highly opinionated architects blasting out opinions, and just listening for moments where he can actually add something. If the end of the discussion is getting near and nobody has made his observations and points, he speaks up. <i>Everyone</i> stops and listens.<p>This has made me more confident in my quiet style. It’s very helpful to know in your gut that you are respected and don’t need to hurry to be the first person to say something. You have nothing to prove. When you wait and only say something that truly advances the discussion, you become mysteriously wise.
Be kind. Be humorous. Be gentle.<p>“In this world … you must be oh so smart or oh so pleasant. Well, for years I was smart. I recommend pleasant.”<p><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EzOIhLJ1C-Y" rel="nofollow">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EzOIhLJ1C-Y</a>
Given a choice to pause and ponder versus jumping in and saying something that you might regret, I would always pick the latter.<p>Most of the time, people who are 'quick-witted' have either come across the situation before and recalled a good response (think chess players memorizing good opening or endgame moves), or that they are actually really good at analyzing and solving a particular type of problem really well (think prodigies that have an abundance of natural talent).<p>This is something that you can practice by listening to what other people say and analyzing the situation rather than jumping in with a comment of your own.<p>In time, you'll be the one jumping in with the 'quick-witted' comment.
1.) Prep in advance, gather and read through materials that you could, think of possible different angles, trajectories, and questions that could come up. Preparing your stand is important (but be mindful that you have to be flexible too as new information comes to light).
2.) I'd usually ask to give more time to it - say that I have to take this away to get a better appreciation of the matter, consult with so and so (e.g. another team or your line manager or an SME), consider other factors in the organisation, etc. The important thing is commit a timeline with them on when you'd be back with a decision.
I would say two things:<p>- stop thinking of yourself as slow thinker/fast thinker<p>- decide if you want to be able to think fast or not and either avoid situations where you have to think fast or seek such situations to practice and get better
One thing I learned -- I think it was from <i>The Pragmatic Programmer</i> -- that helps me when I feel forced into making a quick decision is this three-part answer:<p>1. I don't know,
2. It depends,
3. I'll get back to you.<p>If people don't accept that, I'll follow with some variation of "Do you want me to guess or do you want me to lie? Either way, I'd be feeding you bullshit, and you deserve better than that. Give me a little bit of time to collect my thoughts."
I think you should hesitate - to think of yourself as a slow thinker, that is. What you’ve actually described is performance anxiety, and that’s really very treatable.
As a “slow thinker”, I am continually kicking myself in the arse when I come up with the perfect reply hours or even days later.<p>My compensation is to know the subject inside and out. When I am absolutely aligned with the data being discussed, I can absolutely spar with the best of them.<p>Downside is any context-based subject, such as sarcasm or politics or emotional/fact-free arguments. There is no way to master those, so my slow thinking is a permanent nerf.
As a slow thinker, I think many are missing a really important point, which I was hoping would come up. Sigh.<p>Preparedness is not the solution for many unique and many times life changing situations, where we do not have time to think, but have to make decision very quickly. And I have always failed at that, and created misunderstandings, pain.<p>And having ADHD, slow processing brain, and some hearing loss, I have not seen any solution that would help me.
Worked for a CEO who prided himself in making quick decisions, almost of all them damaging to the company, and would make fun of those who took a moment to think, like me. Although he intensely disliked me, I was the longest tenured Head of Tech because I didn't make mistakes and he couldn't get rid of me.<p>Addendum: I might have taken a while to think through a problem, but I am quick-witted in arguing hahaha!
> Slow thinkers, how do you compensate for your lack of quick-wittedness?<p>1) It may be that you aren't a slow thinker but a bad translator.<p>2) I prepare 70% of a conversation in my head (I may never use it).<p>3) My first drafts are awful. Second and third can be worse. The 30% is the bit I'm less likely to ruin on delivery.<p>4) I used early social media to learn to trim multiple paragraphs down to sentence. I'm still learning it.<p>5) I'm a slow learn. This took years.
For the quick-witted, perhaps learn these skills as well? Not just to be able to coach others, but to degrade more gracefully, be it short-term not-at-your-bestness, or long-term age-related decline. I've been struck by elderly with accumulated rich tooling to fall back on (eg, written systems to supplement declining memory) and degrading gracefully, versus not, and not.
I've found that people who appear quick-witted are either external processors (they like to "talk out loud" and steer their thought process by group reaction) and/or they are deeply prepared for this exact challenge from past experiences. It's exceedingly rare to meet a true polymath who can contribute quickly and meaningfully on just any random topic.
Focus on hearing and understanding others and communicating to them that you hear and understand them. This will make you appear intelligent and it will make you intelligent, and people will listen intently to you when you finally come around with your well thought ideas and perspective. You will be highly respected.<p>Quit worrying about being quick-witted. Revenge is a dish best served cold.
Here is what I will say as a person with a similar situation. We're not dumb, there is just something in our way. Whether that be anxiety to look dumb or something else. My best advice is don't try to be quick, take your time, formulate a thought and own it. That will make you feel less bad about this perceived negative trait.
I work at both extremes. I can make decisions on the fly, or I need time to think and analyze. So I just say where I'm at for any specific question. I'll tell people that I want to take some time to think about whatever the concern is, and most people are respectful of that.<p>If you have a culture of async communication, that helps.
i'm trying to think of a single situation where quick-wittedness is ever actually important outside of cracking jokes and i'm coming up with nothing. i'm a slow thinker too but the amount it causes any issues for me is zero. if i need more time to think about something, i just say that and it's fine.
In circumstances where I’ve seemed this way it’s just that I’ve been thinking about the problem quite a bit and so know the shape of it. In some sense, the quick response is more retrieval than computation.<p>In times when I haven’t appeared like this, I haven’t thought about the problem much. L
Observing other people I interact with often and learn their motivational flows and behavioral patterns. People telegraph a lot once you take the time to study them.<p>I also cultivate a measure of unpredictability in myself to slow other people down by defying their assumptions.
I think try and come up with coping skills/phrases to say.<p>"You know what - my first answer is rarely my best one. Can I mull it over and get back to you by [end of day/tomorrow morning/next Monday]?"<p>This is for questions in meetings. Actual arguments might be harder.
I ask a lot of questions and make the other people talk while I figure out what I am saying. This has the additional benefit of giving me more input. I simply refuse to participate in rapid back and forth. (In my dreams! But it does work sometimes.)
What you may be describing is the virtue of prudence [0]. For that, you need humility, and yes, practice.<p>[0] <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prudence" rel="nofollow">https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prudence</a>
I ask people to email me about the topic, then I spend a while thinking about it before answering.<p>Also, I try to never fire off a reply to an email without 1. writing a first draft, 2. thinking about something else, then 3. revising my draft.
Stall for time: repeat what the other person said back to them, reframe the questions, state the obvious, use filler words, etc. Say stuff mindless enough that you can think about the real problem while talking.
I’m one of those people, I take detailed notes (I have a very strong note taking and annotation system) and most importantly, I just spend more time thinking on the subject or problem than others probably would.
It's a skill you can train, people that deal with customer service or sales tend to have it more developed.<p>It is trainable because I was HORRIBLE at it, and now I can say I'm average/good, and I deliberately practiced.<p>Also, if you are in management, you must exercise this more. Sometimes, you must make decisions quickly, and postponing them has consequences. One example that comes to mind is if a report misbehaves, you can't just let it go, you need to let them know about it (in private) quickly.<p>One tip that helps is to think strategically: what are the first 3 steps? Or the most important 3 steps you could think of?<p>Of course, your answer will have plenty of holes, but a good enough answer is typically good enough for those situations.<p>You can train this daily with your other or family; talk with them, and instead of saying what is comfortable (the next token in your brain LLM), you try to say something better or more enjoyable.<p>That will prompt you to think fast about a new solution.<p>Like with blitz chess, if you want to improve at it, you need to play more using the fundamentals you know from the "slower" chess, which is what you already do now. It isn't as complex as you think, just more practice practice.
There's advantages to slow thinking. Great for strategy and problem solving because you'll have the patience for it, but lacking in the improvisation dept.<p>Then again all you can do is practice.
Try not to worry about what others think of you, and definitely don't think about IQ. Judgment is so much more important than speed. Why are you concerned with speedy thinking?
you can reduce the need to be in those situations<p>when it comes to human interactions, you don't really need to respond. most of that is pride or lack of options.<p>for example, in interpersonal relationships, its a learned trait to not respond reactively<p>in another example if you're overemployed, you don't need to quickly fight for relevance in your job from decisions that could theoretically seem like threats to your division or employment to just you, because you already secretly have another job
Tell my wife the retort I should have come up with 10 minutes earlier, and remind myself that good decisions that truly matter are still just as good the next day.
> how do you compensate for your lack of quick-wittedness?<p>Through poor work/life balance. Working overtime to solve tasks that I can't solve during the regular hours.
Memorize fundamentals and frameworks:<p>Logic, fallacies, philosophy, and science for arguments<p>Fundamental algorithms and structures for code<p>Common joke/meme formats and questions for social skills
I’d describe myself as a slow thinker. I’m hesitant to bring up politics, but I’ve been contemplating this in the context of the upcoming election.<p>I have complete faith in Joe Biden’s ability to make sound decisions through a slow and deliberate process. That’s what the presidency requires.<p>I don’t hold much faith in his ability to compete on the campaign trail, because all people care about is fast thinking in conversation and debate, and he’s quickly losing that ability.<p>I see a pretty clear parallel to myself. I’m able to perform objectively well at work, but I’m not great in fast paced conversations, and unfortunately, interviews.
preparation, rehearsal, role play,<p>delay tactics: take sip of water, ask a clarifying question<p>frame inversion: go on offense, reflect the attention to them- study the dialogue in super hero movies between the hero and villain
long pauses can be rhetorically powerful. i think showing people you’re thinking-and telling them—is also great. you can always say “i need time to process what you said” and write it down
Just a few points....<p>1. Some decisions are better made than delayed. Most choices are reversible. So get over those being be important/relevant.<p>2. Everything else _should_ be thought through. Push for it. If that's not possible then you have to live with the consequences. These are most often sales traps though, see e.g. "scarcity" in "Influence: The psychology of persuasion" which covers deadlines. If you fail for these then please read the book or listen to the audio book.<p>3. Winning an argument is not just about thinking about arguments. See "The art of being right" for a set of arguing tactics that will make you look like you are dumb.<p>4. Fast good action is often a matter of turning it into a routine. That's what you do for incidents (gamedays), fire drills etc. If it matters then better be prepared!<p>But on top of everything.... I've been doing on-call for years. I can tell you that bad decisions under time pressure and emotional stress are often bad and far from optimal. It's ok. It's human.<p>The thing that makes me a bit uneasy is that it looks like you are stressing yourself on top of everything. You can get professional help for that too.
There is nothing special or impressive about quick wittedness. I have at times had moments of whit that has led to achievements, but when reflecting on the outcomes, the whit alone was nothing compared to everything else that unfolded after. To me, people who are quick to throw out "whit", are:<p>- Not paying attention and thinking about what THEY can say next
- Are not listening/respecting the room.
- Typically not asking the "right questions" and pushing shit forward to be "cool"...<p>I would avoid over indexing here and instead aim for skills like, Active Listening, Making Space (for thinking too), Cooperative Collaboration. When I deploy these over whit, my products and teams succeed more often.<p>The last crunchy thing I'll say here- which I say here all the time. This is a symptom of our modern world/social media. Don't fall prey. We see people all around us throwing out ideas, projecting success... It's all BS. Amplified by the platforms.
What worked for me after being shouted down by a PM's line of bullshit: Gather references, incorporate quotes and links into an email addressed to all participants, with title something like "Clarification of technical issues raised in yesterday's XYZ meeting". Mention no one by name.
I don't think I'm a "slow thinker" but I definitely don't like rushing arguments or struggling with fast-talking sophists.<p>What do I do? I shut up and listen.<p>When the other person says something wrong, I shake my head. If it's obviously wrong, I say no with the tip finger. If it's insultingly wrong, I use the middle finger :)<p>Usually the other person CAN NOT STOP talking. That's good. If I'm pressed to talk I simply say "that's a whole lot of bullshit" and refuse to answer bad faith arguments.<p>Meanwhile I have enough time to think a thorough response. Questions like "are you really saying that..." are the best counters.
I would not say fast is better than slow when it comes to thinking. It's not something to compensate for.<p>It's like with breaking news. Do you want to be first, or correct? The two are usually at odds, and serve different purposes.<p>The quickest wits do improv comedy, and what makes improv funny is the mistakes that turn into happy accidents, usually precipitated by speed.<p>There is great strength, confidence, and accuracy that can come from deliberately slowing down. Your words have more meaning.
Focus on listening. Pay attention. Don’t zone out.<p>That is not about being slow. By showing interest and actively participating, your brain should already get pre-warmed with your thoughts.<p>In a group meeting, imagine that at any time, you should be ready to reply to the question: <i>“what do you think?”</i> This requires actively listening and focus.<p>If you are zoning out, ask yourself why you are really attending that meeting in the first place.
Slow is not dumb. Thinking "on your feet" is different from having a high IQ.<p>I have known people who were at best average in intelligence, but in their area of competence, worked well under time pressure. Among other things, they make great first a responders!<p>There are also high IQ types who need time to ponder. They work poorly under pressure.
I'm not sure I'm a slow thinker, but I often over think which causes me to delay output. I also struggle with word recall which compounds my issues with real-time communication. This is something I tried to seek some advice on the other day without much luck, <a href="https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=39512837">https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=39512837</a><p>Regardless of whether I'm a slow thinker or not though, we have the exact same problem in that my ability to answer questions on the spot is probably comparable to someone with an IQ in the 80-90 range, while my actual IQ is likely somewhere around 130.<p>The only thing that I can realistically do is just reject to answer certain questions on the spot. Normally I'll say something like, "I'm sorry, I'd need to think about that a bit and get back to you", but obviously whether or not this is appropriate will depend on the context – you can't say this in an interview, for example.<p>I'm also autistic and something I've learnt in life is that when you have such divergent abilities really have no option but to play to your strengths. There are always things you can do to improve where your ability is lacking, but realistically you're not going to be able to completely alter the way your mind works. The better strategy is just to appreciate the ways you excel and try your best to use your strengths to add value to the situations you find yourself in.<p>So for me I think my ability to go away and reflect on problems is excellent, so if this is an option for me that's what I'll try to do. So maybe your strength just isn't in real-time debates? Maybe you're better at making your arguments via blog posts, or if this is at work perhaps you're good at going away, thinking about something and then writing up a proposal with your reasoning.<p>The other way this effects me which I'll briefly comment on is my ability to joke and have small talk. Because I'm not very witty and I'm autistic I can naturally come off as a bit cold and detached in conversations. I deal with this by trying to overcompensate for my natural coldness by smiling and showing appreciation for people so they know I'm not cold because I don't like them, I'm just a bit socially awkward. I don't know if you have the same problem, but this helps me a ton at work. I think people who lack social wit often fall into trap of thinking that they can't be likeable people, but really the reason they're not likeable is because they make people feel uncomfortable around them. In my experience people kinda like awkward people when they're friendly and positive to be around. There's lots of examples of lovable awkward characters in popular media that might come to mind and be good models to try to replicate in your own interactions.
Thinking quickly is overrated... and besides, doing it well only comes with lots of experience. I say just keep thinking slowly and deliberately for now
At work, you can buy reasonable time: "let me get back to you"<p>Outside work, people remember/invite people who are empathetic and/or fun to be around, not those who win arguments. In fact argument winners tend to annoy people more.<p>There are very few high-stakes situations where quick thinking is crucial. What most people mistake for quick thinking (say averting a mishap during airplane landing) is trained muscle memory, which comes from long prep.