I used to be similarly lost in the drama of my own life, hanging on to things that I felt made me special. It's an ego trap in my opinion, as there are millions of people around us who have extrodinary lives that we never hear about. The word "sonder" applies:<p><i>Sonder is defined as the profound feeling of realizing that everyone, including strangers passing by on the street, has a life as complex and vivid as your own. They experience hopes, dreams, friendships, routines, worries and an inner life, all of which you'll likely never know about or fully understand.</i><p><i>The term was coined by John Koenig in The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows, a compendium of newly invented words for powerful feelings that don't have a descriptive term in the English language.</i><p>I had a sponser do me a favor once and tell me "you're a special case of the same old thing." It helped me get over myself.
Most other comments so far have viewed this artist's lifestyle negatively, as he wrote that he got by via abusing various policies and tax fraud (via "[hallucinating] a DJ software skin" to claim as a business expense). But he's an interesting person for sticking to his craft for close to a decade now: he has persisted in working hard to produce artwork and submit it for exhibition.<p>However, to what extent is this lifestyle necessary as an artist? A common piece of advice for many artists is to consider developing a steady career independent of one's art, which lets them afford their lifestyle as an artist (such as by writing, creating artwork, or performing during the evenings and weekends). But the effectiveness of this advice must vary for the individual: it's also common for many people to drop their artwork or stop taking it seriously in favour of their paying career.<p>For this artist in particular, I wonder if a steady job would have been a positive or negative to his art. In this case, the income would have reduced his suffering especially as he's dealing with medical debt. It could have even granted him additional artistic freedom, as he writes about the pressures to "defect" and his acceptance of more commercial work for money. Yet at the same time, it's possible that part of the desperation is behind his drive as an artist—though it's also risky to romanticize this desperation.
It's a clever bit.<p>It is intellectually amusing to read, and I'm sure to write, a character that the reader hates. But the detachment becomes exhausting quick. It's a dead end; you spent all of this effort being clever, with what to show for it? After reading it, I find myself questioning which side of the joke is real and which is false, and whether I'm in the real part of the joke or the false part. Which is ultimately a fruitless exercise, since the whole thing is intentionally set up to be pointless. Got me, I guess?<p>I do like the visuals though.
The question I have not yet seen in the comments here is whether or not this post is real or fiction. Is it the journal of a questionable character, or a deliberate attempt to push people's buttons?<p>And honestly, that is why I like it. I really hope it cannot be taken at face value - that would be disappointment.
This was a great read and reminiscent of Kerouac (to me). It also makes me think of a life a consciously decided I didn't want after I finished art academy. I've seen others who did and got out after decades of trying and failing. I was lucky to figure out that going to art school to become an artist is a pipe dream.
The essence and moral of this quite wonderful piece:<p><i>“No one wants to listen to an artist describe their work, but everyone wants to be told my rib story.”</i>
This man has lived a life many fantasise about, although perhaps not a very comfortable one. I think sometimes I lived a colourful, varied life but what a story for this piece.<p>I can't believe I have to do the reddit edit postscriptum but really, does everyone dislike the author? I certainly could never be this sort of person, but what a story, living life on the edge and making it up as they go along. Do commenters never daydream, like just imagine how life would be if things had turned out differently?
I don’t think there’s a direct correlation between commercial and artistic value. But there has to come a point where people who create this kind of stuff realise they’re not Van Gogh. Top points for edginess though, I guess
This is one of the best, funniest pieces of writing I have read in months - The utter detachment and cynicism displayed around this borderline Hunter S Thompson acid trip is breath of fresh air.
Some highlights reading through:<p>> I fly Spirit to Chicago, where all my friends are too busy buying property or accepting professorships to try the ketamine a guy gave me for letting him suck my dick.<p>> At the end of the shoot, I’m $40k in debt and severely constipated.<p>> There’s the explanation: Blaze broke Hollywood’s dick off, and now he’s dead.<p>> My therapist suggests I take a trip to see friends because I keep calling myself an incel. I have a feeling she’s sick of watching a grown man cry about how hard it is to poop and wants new material.<p>> I tell them God will use the bone to create a third gender.<p>> Even if it doesn’t work out between this new being and me, I’m able to autofellate. I now have half an hourglass figure and, naturally, am starting an OnlyFans.<p>I feel like I know so many people with 1/10th the spunk/pizzazz/personality/attitude of this author. How did one person luck out and get such a "concentration" of unique-ness?
It's not a lifestyle I'd want to emulate. The author/character does seem to have some kind of moral code, at least. From my reading, it seems like he's OK with harming the "haves" but I didn't notice him harming any "have nots". I'd guess he's Chaotic Neutral alignment. From easydamus.com: "People who are neutral with respect to good and evil have compunctions against killing the innocent but lack the commitment to make sacrifices to protect or help others. Neutral people are committed to others by personal relationships... Chaotic characters follow their consciences, resent being told what to do, favor new ideas over tradition, and do what they promise if they feel like it."
“I ask a model what they would get paid for a shoot and propose $2,000 to Barney’s. They reject my proposal and offer a $1,000 gift card.”<p>Probably asked a woman model not a male model. Women get double what men get for modeling.
> A gallerist who wants to work with me says she can’t add a white man to her roster.<p>Pretty fucking disgusting that someone would openly say that to him.
Several commenters here hate the writer, calling him "completely insufferable", "a character that the reader hates", or "a selfish, narcissistic jerk". But I didn't find him that bad? His worst crime was stealing a $4000 suit from Barneys New York.
Aside from the essay, can somebody please explain to me the appeal of "art works" like the ones that Andrew produces? It's gotta be some kind of joke that I missed the memo on, right!?
Imagine writing something with such honesty & the people reading don't stop to reflect on how this is just one facet of how the systems they prop up push people into operating to survive. They just judge the person, as though they live in a vacuum.
The more I read this, the more I dislike the writer. Probably some mixture of disgust and jealousy, as a failed artist who can't bring myself to do/am incapable of doing the things he's done to see some measure of success. Is this what it takes (for an extroverted white dude)?