I ask friends with special skills to help me from time to time. In return I help them with things I know how to do. If they ask for too much I simply explain that what they want will be too time consuming, is out of my area of expertise, or that I don’t have enough free time at the moment.<p>It’s usually not difficult to tell someone no.
>One of the challenges working as a software developer is that friends and family tend to view 'tech' as an amorphous blob.<p>Forget friends and family, most Project/Product Managers think the same way, and they are often way harder to say no to.
When asked for a favour, I often ask that a task be done first.<p>That step often culls out the takers, because they can't even be bothered to do something cheap or basic. Or maybe it is just the introduced delay?
This helps explain the origin of the phrase "pay the piper".<p>If one has a skill, e.g. squeezing the four-reeded monster, the "good idea faeries" will be after one constantly. While out of practice, I do play, and speak from experience here.<p>The brisk "bucks up front" attitude is about keeping the riff-raff at bay.<p>Thus, I am fastidious about not mooching. If I'm requesting help, I start with "What is your consulting rate?" If people demure, fall back to "Can I donate a suitable amount to your charity of choice?"
> I even once had a friend ask me for help with his electric toothbrush.<p>Are we sure they’re asking him for help because he’s a developer, or just because they need help with something? This sounds like they just genetically need help with something
>I've often wondered why people don't expect free labour from other trades.<p>lol, what? Spend any amount of time with a tradesperson (or go on a trade-specific subreddit) and you’ll hear plenty of stories about people asking for free labor or a quick favor.<p>For what it’s worth, “I’m sorry, I don’t know how to fix that. I’d try (basic troubleshooting step) and then talk to (person who actually knows how to fix it) if that doesn’t work” usually works fine for me. Most people aren’t trying to milk you for endless free work.
Be benevolent, but ration out your help to those you want to give it to. Also, use it as a network builder and give help to multimillionaires; never worry about a job or resume again.<p>Less chance of ending up bitter about it.