When I broke up with my girlfriend, I de-activated from Facebook. Honestly, the experience was incredible. I felt like I had my life back. I ended up calling my friends and talking to them instead of writing stupid wall posts. I felt so self-aware of my free time that I actually started exercising more. I didn't have to fear that I would get in trouble at work for not working, nor did I have to delete inappropriate tags/pictures/comments. AND because I wasn't stalking anyone, I actually developed a healthy relationship with my ex.<p>I came back to Facebook though...eventually. My friends cried foul. I gave in. But as my social groups dissociate and morph, I'm feeling the need to leave again. Some things in life are just better off forgetting. You keep in touch with the friends you want to see and those that make an actual effort back. Poking doesn't cut it.<p>Thats how life should be lived. I want it back.
Is it facebook that is the problem or the use of facebook?<p>I log into facebook about once a week (slightly more recently but hey I'm inbetween jobs). I check my messages respond, see if there is anything of intrest. Beyond that the only time I respond on facebook is when I get an email about it.<p>I do find facebook useful to send a message to that girl I was best friends with in Middle School, or that dude that I hung out with in High School.<p>If you limit your use of facebook then it does not control your life. This sounds more like a case of an addiction than something wrong with the platform (though there are things wrong with the platform imho).
Only interesting thing about this article is that it may be part of a larger reversal of sentiment toward Facebook by the main stream media.<p>But I have felt for a while that the way you share on Facebook is geared toward kids & college students. Once you're grown up, the distinction between colleague, friend, and boss can get much blurrier.<p>I want to be able share some things with old friends from childhood, and other things with friends from work, etc.<p>I'm more sensitive to the fact that every email I send someone is an imposition, and had better be worth their time, because every email I get is yet another thing to deal with. I want a way to share things with people in a way that isn't "push".<p>I think a "Facebook for grownups" site that took these ideas into account could get a lot of traction. (Maybe such a thing already exists, but I haven't encountered it.)
I don't know why but i laugh really hard at<p>"Instead of scouring my friends' friends' photos for other possible friends, I could have been raising money for Darfur relief"<p>One way for facebook to be a bit useful is to gain 1000s of "friends" and create a group or app to raise awareness or money for your cause.<p>I only have a handful of real friend so I don't feel ashamed of marketing to fb friends especially if it is for a good cause.
I use Facebook much like I use LinkedIn: as a way for people to find me (and sometimes to find people I have lost touch with).<p>To keep my Facebook profile somewhat "alive", I have my Twitter account set to automatically update my Facebook status and I use the Wordbook plugin for WordPress to automatically post my latest blog posts to my Facebook Wall. Email alerts on Facebook are configured to notify me of the rare events when someone requests friendship or responds to my Facebook status, so I rarely even need to login.
For me, facebook just enables a faster way to keep connections with people in the interim between actually doing things with them in person. I can see how it can be destructive to sit on FB for hours on end and not actually go spend time with people, but like anything else, it can be used for good or for ill -it's all about balance.