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Things I wish someone had told me about life after college

203 pointsby kineover 12 years ago

29 comments

prophetjohnover 12 years ago
I just graduated last night, but this doesn't feel terribly enlightening to me. I don't know if I didn't have the typical college experience or if people like the author just tend to be more vocal about their experience because those in my position had a less rosy view of the whole thing. But it's obvious that I'm in a different group when I read stuff like<p>&#62; <i>There’s no more Spring break or three months off for summer.</i><p>When I was in college (feels weird to say it in the past tense), summer wasn't 3 months off. If I wasn't taking any classes, I was working full-time so that during the long semesters, I could work only part-time and still be able to pay rent. Spring break meant I could get a little boost to get me through until summer.<p>I just finished yesterday and I'm intensely relieved. I will have so much more free time than I've had the last several years. Maybe I can start a side project or contribute to open source. I'm playing a video game right now. A month ago I would've felt guilty because weekends were the only time I could catch up on homework.<p>My post-graduation plans? Seize all that extra free time! Start working out more. Go to that weekly Reddit poker night. Go to more concerts. Go to programmer meetups.
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Shenglongover 12 years ago
<i>Keep those hobbies going. Keep playing soccer, or pool, or surfing. Keep doing yoga. Keep reading. Keep doing you. You’ll develop some great friends around those interests.</i><p>One of my most resounding fears is meeting people in different fields. In school, it's easy. I can go to a party, go out to a club with friends, or just sit down at a library table with a stranger and meet someone new.<p>Out of school, it seems those opportunities erode... and the majority of friends are either coworkers or friends from the past :(<p>For those of you who have graduated recently, how have you dealt with this? Not that tech friends aren't great - but diversity is wonderful.
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the_cat_kittlesover 12 years ago
Some positives I didn't realize about life after college:<p>- You have complete control over you choices. You did in college, but by choosing to go, you are forfeiting some of that I think, at least psychologically.<p>- There may be things about school in general that you hated, or thought were stupid, but never realized until you got some distance from them. I had this experience, I was filled with a warm glow for about a year when I realized this!<p>- You are in the "real" world. I hate this distinction, because it is not true, but it is still nice to know that the hopefully small part of your mind that subscribes to that distinction can now forget about it.<p>- You can use all your strengths to do what you want. Instead of trying to play the academic game, which limits the degree to which you can be resourceful, now you can use anything and everything to make things happen.<p>- You will learn a lot more about who you are, and your natural tendencies, since you have so much more freedom.<p>- I was, and still am surprised at how incredibly incomprehensibly vast and mysterious the world is. This was much more hidden to me in school.<p>This may not be true for everyone, or even for most, but I'm sure there are lots of people on HN who felt these things. To those of you on your way to graduation, I hope you aren't fearful. For me, it was probably the happiest transition of my life. That's not to say there weren't some of the most extreme difficulties, but overall, its been wonderful.
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JagMickerover 12 years ago
Here are some things I wish someone would've shared with me...<p>- If you want to thrive in the professional world, get a fucking haircut and at least look the part.<p>- If you think that you can send out a bunch of resumes and be flooded with calls about job offers, you are wrong.<p>- Most of the phrases you've heard in your youth are true. Ex. "The squeaky wheel gets the grease". See the above point. If you get a job (or a check) just by sending a resume (or invoice), consider it an anomaly, and yourself lucky.<p>- In life, everyone is only concerned about their own well-being. You've got to learn to highlight 'what's in it for them'. See the above point.<p>- You're on your own, so make your time and actions count!
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larsbergover 12 years ago
&#62; Your first job out of college won’t make you or break you<p>I disagree with this statement. Certainly, if you go to Google/Facebook/Microsoft/Apple, the choice doesn't matter and you can do whatever after you've learned how to work on real software.<p>But getting into games and many other fields can be astoundingly difficult even two years out of college, as it's difficult to overcome the "finance," "healthcare," or "consulting" tags once they're on your resume. For better or worse, employers usually only see new college grads as full of potential to do anything; after even a single stint at X, you're branded an X-person.
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JDSDover 12 years ago
The vast majority of kids who enter college do so right after high school. They are used to summers off, parents sending tuition checks and allowances for rent/living. There is a misunderstanding in todays youth that college is a social club with the side effect of gaining an education. Few kids choose their school on quality of education, but rather how big the parties are/what the scene is like.<p>To me this entire subject reeks of #firstworldproblems, and the fact I don't have much respect for the beaten path or the zombies they churn out(referring to a BA). Life after college isn't hard at all. This generation is simply not used to feeling ANY discomfort or pain in their sheltered little lives.<p>Not going to college and excelling to the point of someone with a degree is not that difficult, though it's more difficult than going to a structured setting to be hand-fed information. (most of college could be condensed into one year study, one year practical)<p>Working in an electronic graveyard in Ghana at age 13 with no parents seems difficult. It seems in places like this, limits of the human experience are tested everyday in terms of what people can and cannot withstand. Spend some time learning how other people live purely for our convenience, and repeat "Graduating college is a difficult transition from one easy thing to the next easy thing." You'll sound ridiculous.
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radarsat1over 12 years ago
I am currently dealing with this. I'm not sure about his specific tips, but the general feeling that this transition is not easy is something I don't feel I was adequately prepared for. I just finished my PhD and started working at a company, and I thought I would really enjoy the job since it's in a fun and exciting field, but honestly the experience has been pretty jarring. I've spent the last 7 years basically in charge of my own research projects, and all of a sudden being tasked to fix someone else's software that I'd never seen before and that was already at quite an advanced stage was just a bit difficult and a shock to my system. Not that I couldn't handle the work <i>technically</i> (I managed to commit a few pretty important bug fixes in my first week), but socially and mentally it was very difficult for me; suddenly not being around any of the people I have become good friends with, and being tied down to such a strict work schedule. 9-to-5 instead of waking up when I feel like it and taking a long coffee break with my friends in the afternoon. I am sort of starting to get used to it, but it sure hasn't been easy.
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kleinschover 12 years ago
100% agree about keeping hobbies going (or developing new ones). If your whole life is going to work and hanging out with the friends you made in college/high school, you're not going to make a lot of new friends.<p>I joined a triathlon team five years after college and have had an amazing time. I'm not an athlete at all, but nobody cares - half the team is just there to meet people and have fun. I really wish I'd gotten into it (or something similar) straight out of college. My social life would have been a lot better.
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JDuMondover 12 years ago
I graduated Dec. '11. There are three things that I wish I had been told about working after college:<p>1. Find a mentor. If you have any flexibility in the projects you work on or the people you get to work with choose to work with someone who will be a mentor to you. I think we're all familiar with the benefits of a mentor as a teacher, but there's another important function of a mentor: they can be a "cheerleader". A good mentor will talk you up around his co-workers and management, and make sure that those who don't work directly with know that you are capable of putting out quality work and that you should be considered for more interesting/challenging work in the future.<p>3. Ask questions. When you start your new job you'll feel like you need to prove yourself as just as capable as everyone who's been working on the same project/codebase/technology for years. So you'll stay late banging your head against the desk trying to solve a problem that has nagged you for days. You finally breakdown and ask an experienced engineer what he thinks, he says, "Oh yeah, I've seen this a hundred times. It tricky the first time you come across it..." and then explains how to fix it in a few minutes. If you had gone to him earlier you could have increased your productivity and saved your self a headache. The more experienced engineers are a resource. If you aren't using all the resources available to you to get work done efficiently, you're not doing your job.<p>2. If you're unhappy with your work, speak up. Your management cannot read minds. If you find your work soul crushing but you do well on it your management will keep you there until you burnout. At that point you'll rip off your clothes and streak through the halls and your management will think, "I never saw that coming." Your company(probably) wants you to be happy because if you are you'll be more productive and that adds to there bottom line. Let your management know that you would like to do other work and they'll try to move you somewhere you can be happy. It may take time but I've found that just knowing that you management cares goes a long way to easing the pain. If your management does care, start working on your resume and browse wanted ads during lunch.
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elstevoover 12 years ago
I've found that it's easy to let your life become unfocused after leaving college. Up until graduation, you always had built-in goals on which to focus: pass that test, find scholarships/jobs, graduate, etc...<p>After graduating and finding a job, I was suddenly without any pressing objectives in my life. What's next? Retirement? That's way too far off (probably). I was working and living my life day-to-day, not unhappy, but sort of drifting without direction.<p>As cliché as it sounds, trying to answer the question "where do I want to be in 1, 5, 10 years" honestly helped. I thought about it for a while and came up with some vague ideas. Every once in a while, I do a mental progress check and that helps me see past the daily routine to something greater.
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benhebertover 12 years ago
This month marks one year out of college for me. 2012 was the most productive year of my life.<p>The best advice that I could give anyone is,<p>"Don't be afraid to be yourself"<p>While in school a lot of this is defined for you, but the real world will challenge you in ways you haven't seen. Do not roll over for your job, friends, girlfriend, whatever.<p>If you don't know who you are or what you want (none of us really do), try as many different things as you can. Explore, learn, fail, succeed, cry, laugh... just experience things and find yourself.
babyover 12 years ago
No one prepared me to college and I fucked up big times my first years. Makes me want to write a post about it too.
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JacksonGarietyover 12 years ago
Seems like these are instructions for how to live life by default. Instructions on how to fit into the cogs of the system and not fall into depression. In my opinion, life should not be like this.<p>For those who haven't already, you should read this article from HN a few weeks ago:<p><a href="http://www.raptitude.com/2012/07/most-lives-are-lived-by-default/" rel="nofollow">http://www.raptitude.com/2012/07/most-lives-are-lived-by-def...</a>
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nealabqover 12 years ago
Remember how those first few weeks of college were intensely social. You meet a lot of people you'll know the rest of your life. It's a critical time. I recommend:<p>Social &#62; academic. But they're intertwined, so work hard, and work with others in your core area. Be helpful and smart and humble. Don't worry about your non-core subjects (let others help you).<p>Don't go nuts with freedom. Go to parties, but drink very little, avoid drugs, don't get caught up in sex. It's fun, but save it for later.<p>Don't go back home. Don't have a girlfriend back home. Don't have a girlfriend at all, this is a time for lots and lots of friends.<p>Avoid toxic people.
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guitarhacksover 12 years ago
Nice tips but I already knew that in elementary school. The most important thing is not the transition after the college or university but your work and making connections WHILE you are studying. - You must build your network while you are studying and find people who you like to work with (look at Facebook?). Of course that depends on what University you are studying. Better University, better networks.<p>- Besides chasing girls and partying don't just learn to get good grades. Find something you like to do and work on it, your field of interest etc.<p>- Join all kinds of university projects WHILE you are studying that you think can help in your future job, career. Ask your teacher and tell him: I WANT MORE :) Especially if he is well known and you think he is awesome. Work more then everybody else and show him your own projects. He will introduce you to other interesting people. Latter in your life he can recommend you to someone or help you in finding a good job (maybe, you never know).<p>- Go to other lectures and find interesting people and ideas<p>- Don't enjoy your student life too much<p>If you work on all this your transition will be a lot better after you get out. I studied with one of the best teachers and performers in my field and he used to say to his students: "Look at that guy over there (me), you have to be crazy like him"
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sownover 12 years ago
One thing I noticed is that it is very, very lonely. I'm still trying to figure out ways to meet people and make friends, good friends even. No dice.<p>Maybe I'm just not very fun to be around.
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jtheoryover 12 years ago
Advice I'd add: pay careful attention to the responsibilities you take on.<p>Owning a car -- you have to maintain it, possibly repair it occasionally, insure it, etc.. A pet is quite a large one -- want to travel for a few months? And you'll probably have that dog for the next 10-15 years, and they may get sick along the way. Owning a house, of course, but also renting -- you have to deal with minor damage, rent, keeping the landlord informed ("I didn't notice water started leaking in during the winter" is very bad).<p>Debt, of course -- what if you can't quit an exhausting job you detest, because you're paying down large debts?<p>Many of these things are rewarding (I love having a dog, for example, though it does make some things hard...) -- I'm not saying don't do them, just realize what you're trading. Take on new responsibilities one at a time, and do it with your eyes open.<p>I personally wish I'd been slower to take on new responsibilities when I was first out of college -- my first salary seemed huge, and so I traded up my $900 car for a $12K one, married my long-time girlfriend in a way-too-expensive wedding, and got a puppy... not mistakes, per se, but it was all much too fast.
justhwover 12 years ago
Not a main issue but this <i>... put everyone’s phone in a bag. Great conversations ensue.</i> Seeing phones out around a table bothers me terribly.
braveheart1723over 12 years ago
- Don't sell out. Find out what you love whether it's design, programming, assembly, hacking stuff, building stuff, whatever... and do that.<p>If you sell out, at the beginning you might make loads of $$$, it'll be amazing, maybe you'll make more than your dad ever made, maybe you'll buy yourself a 70" TV but trust me... 3 to 5 years in. You'll be that annoying guy that tells all his friends he sold out and really wished to have been an actor, a sportsman, an artist, a musician, an animator.<p>- Save enough $$$ for 6months of living without work, all of a sudden you'll be a lot pickier on what you work on.<p>- watch <a href="http://www.beautyisembarrassing.com/" rel="nofollow">http://www.beautyisembarrassing.com/</a>
mhewettover 12 years ago
As a 55 year old I would say that this is exactly right, especially the part about keeping yourself healthy, both physically and mentally. I have, and it has paid off.<p>I would add one item to the list: Set a 5-year goal and update it every year.
hamzillaover 12 years ago
The comfort zone one is important. I know a lot of people that stop growing their skills because the money is flowing and it's easy. When you stop growing, it's probably time to move on.
lalmalangover 12 years ago
I dont usually bring it up, but curious - am I the only one who finds a blurb like this a bit unseemly:<p><pre><code> If you enjoyed this post, I’d be humbled if you’d follow me on Twitter.</code></pre>
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iammcover 12 years ago
From personal experience: don't do anything for the money, ever.
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brackinover 12 years ago
I haven't gone to College, I've gone out from High School and started building a startup. Doesn't apply so much to me because when I wasn't working in school I was up all night getting a few hours of sleep after working on projects.
sayemmover 12 years ago
Recent college grads should read Charlie Hoehn's ebook, <i>Recession-Proof Graduate</i> - <a href="http://charliehoehn.com/rpgrad/" rel="nofollow">http://charliehoehn.com/rpgrad/</a>
j45over 12 years ago
The one fun one: If you think you're done learning, you're done.
WalterBrightover 12 years ago
Probably what I miss most about college is living off the same hall as most of your friends, who you're around 24 hours a day. There was always something fun going on.
michaelochurchover 12 years ago
What got me in the adult world was "4.0 syndrome". (Well, my actual GPA wasn't 4.0, but close.) Not that I was used to getting great grades and had a rude awakening, because school was a lot more intellectually challenging than 95+ percent of what I encountered in the real world, but that school led me to believe the world was more meritocratic, fair, and straight-forward than it actually is.<p>For example, some teachers were better than others-- I actually lucked out and had mostly good ones-- but I never had a teacher who went out of his way to be unfair. But I've had more than one manager who was outright scummy. School doesn't prepare you for this, because while there are demanding teachers, unfair or corrupt ones (while they exist) are extraordinarily rare.<p>Also, in college, you have career coherence. The work that is put in front of you is designed to teach you the basic concepts, so you'll usually learn something from it. The rare cases where this isn't the case are when you have outright incompetent professors. Either way, though, if you do the work you will usually get the knowledge and credibility that you need for your career. Useless, unappreciated busy-work is quite rare in college, but it's common in the work world.<p>To get anything close to 100% career coherence at work, you have to actively manage your career. If you just do what your manager tells you to do, you're probably looking at 25%, which means you get 1 year of real progress per 4 of work.<p>In the real world, the deadlines aren't well-tested. They might be unrealistic or make no sense. The work isn't designed to teach you things, and if you graduate past the work you're being assigned and are ready to move on, that comes down more to social skills than anything else. In school, you can skip grades. In work, you actually need social engineering (or frequent job changes) to progress faster than the slow players for whom the typical track is designed.<p>"4.0 Syndrome" is seen heavily in startups and investment banking analyst programs, because there's a crop of 22-year-olds every year who will meet every "deadline" no matter how ridiculous. They haven't learned that many real-world "deadlines" are just made up times that are often impossible to meet. (In school, they're also "made up times", but there are a large number of people facing the same deadlines, and they'll generally moved if they're really unreasonable.)<p>It's also a dangerous trait to have, because it can lead you to over-perform at work, which in most office cultures is more dangerous than underperforming because (a) you become a target for adversity, and (b) you lose social polish if you overwork yourself, and social success is more important than raw "performance".
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frozenportover 12 years ago
&#62;&#62;Play with your schedule. Wake up earlier, go to bed later. Time-shifting is your friend.<p>This is bad advice, in college you can skip classes and choose where to fail, you can't skip meetings and your mistakes live can't be dismissed. Having an inconsistent sleep schedule is a great way to mess up your life.