2nd year Comp Sci student that just now figured out I have ADD

I haven't been medicated for my pretty severe ADD in years (I was very uncomfortable with the personality changes/dampening of creativity/unknown health impact of meds, etc.), thinking I could summon the willpower and discipline to get through it.<p>I've been spiraling downward in a tailspin of <i>"unproductivity"</i> - to coin a state of being - for a while now, leaving a trail of half started startups and projects in my wake. I've got freelance deadlines that I've missed this week, but I'm sitting here with 30+ HN tabs open in my browser, and probably 10,000 more bookmarked that I'll never read.<p>I've been working on the "final 10%" of several projects at a snail's pace, for way longer than the first 90% took, and I constantly vacillate between thinking they're the next big thing or a complete waste of time, but I can't - or won't - finish them. More importantly, I'm <i>incapable</i> of doing the smart thing and just choosing one to focus on.<p>If I'm honest with myself, I haven't been nearly as aggressive as I should have been in researching cognitive behavioral therapy techniques and other non-pharmaceutical coping techniques, or even pursuing some sort of therapy.<p>Am I kidding myself thinking I can somehow get past this without medication? Is there any other <i>REAL</i> path forward?

A thing which I find works well for my ADD is to talk (out loud, yes) to myself when I'm doing something. I think people have a harder time getting distracted from conversations, and there's also a 'rubber duck debugging' effect in that your own thoughts become clearer.<p>Unfortunately this usually requires you to be in an empty room, which isn't always possible. And this is more of a micro thing, not a macro one.

I went through this myself a couple of years ago. I had managed to make it all the way through school but once I entered professional life, I realized that people actually had conversations that I couldn't keep focused for. Using urgency to complete projects no longer worked with the time frames I was looking at.<p>The best thing in the world I ever did was go see a psychiatrist to get tested to see if I was ADD. After the test came back positive, he prescribed meds, and after finding one that worked for me, I was simply blown away.<p>I never knew that you could actually think about one thing at a time before. I never really understood what it was to have a conversation and not be thinking about a billion things. I never, ever, knew what it meant to focus on something. It's entirely changed my world.<p>Wish you well my friend. At least go get tested. If you decide to take meds or follow some other avenue, it's better to know what you're working with.

First, you are not alone. Many high achieving folks have ADD, and many discover it later in life. Very bright people can get through grade school without realizing they have ADD until they eventually hit their wall. It sounds like you are running into yours.<p>Understand that this does not mean there is anything wrong with who you are. You could decide to find other strengths or focus on other studies. You could also find an expert who can diagnosis whether you have ADD and help you consider treatment options. The cool thing about ADD is that there is medication that can make a dramatic difference. It's like flipping a switch and becoming that person who suddenly can finish those projects and achieve what you know you are already capable of.<p>You should find an expert to talk to, and you should look for resources at your university. You could check whether there is a student/academic assistance center. Even though your grades are good (you're by no means failing), there should be folks there with experience diagnosing issues such as ADD.<p>You could also simply check at the student health center - they should be able to refer you to a psychiatrist. Don't be hesitant to go just because it's a psychiatrist. ADD is nothing like more serious mental issues that we associate with psych. In fact you could say that ADD is just a variation of normal - but the first variation of normal that we have discovered how to hack with meds. Nevertheless, treatment can make a real difference in the quality of your studies, your relationships, and your future success. So it's worth exploring.<p>And as for your parents, don't let them talk you out of getting the resources you feel you need. It's always possible that one/both of them have it too without realizing it. Most adults these days are diagnosed as a result of their child(ren) being diagnosed first.<p>Good luck, and hope that wasn't too long and boring to read. :)

Christ, I could have written this. Just found out last month. Not the best feeling in the world.<p>Advice: go talk to a counselor at your university. At the very least, they should be able to point you in the right direction studies-wise.

Congratulations. Now you <i>know</i> your brain just doesn't work like the typical brain. And that's a good thing. You can see things differently even if there are times when you can't see things the same way the typical person sees them (social cues, body language, but you can still learn to pick those up). Use ADD to your advantage. I'm at least twice your age, but had a similar experience at your age. I'm still trying to finish school but it didn't stop me from developing a career as a software engineer. I can personally attest that exercise and the "no sugar/low carb/paleo diet" mentioned by Dylan. Ambient and trance can also help at times. Lists, small goal, small breaks, help you practice focus. Medicine can help, but only in combination with behavioral therapy. Medicine has side effects, too. Many things will be harder for you to accomplish in a given amount of time while other times you'll be amazed that others are so slow. If your ADD is documented and you are being treated by a medical professional, you can get extra time for assignments, lecture notes in advance, and other accommodations like a private room for exams where you can read out loud along with extended time limits. ADD isn't a limiter to your personal success and happiness. It's a challenge to which you adjust.

It could be food-related. Look into an elimination diet ... Also, look into innerchild / regression therapy. There's usually an underlying reason why our behaviours lead to procrastination. Good luck.<p>Edit: Oh, and yoga's good too. You can train the mind to be more focused. Everything takes practice to get good at it ... focus isn't any different - though with computers and multi-tasking, we sometimes think we're "focused" because we're working, but really we're not focused on any one thing.

Not too familiar with ADD/ADHD but from some reading I've done it seems that this is prone to misdiagnosis VERY often so you should be cautious with just jumping on prescriptions...<p>Whether you actually have it or not, I think it's great that you are noticing these traits of yours. Now you can start looking for solutions! Find ways to motivate yourself (HN community is great), get organized, and if still needed then find the right medicine that fits with the rest of your life.

Bottom Line: You have identified your problem. Your previous attempts at a solution have failed. Keep looking for solutions until you find something that works.<p>In my experience, adderall is extremely helpful. And in fact, I feel more like my normal self when I take it (after the first few days of feeling like I was on speed). A healthy diet and exercise is critical too, as is a balanced life in general.<p>Your brain is biological, just like the rest of your body. It can have various types and degrees of deviations from "normal", and I'm not sure there even is a "normal". So, definitely listen to people you love and respect, but always keep in mind that only you know what it's like to be you (to the extent you understand yourself). It's equally important to take responsibility for what you can, and to avoid blaming yourself for things incorrectly. You will be able to tell the difference more and more as you spend time observing and trying to truly understand yourself, without judgement or pretense.<p>There are challenges that cannot be overcome with sheer power of will, especially if the will is the very thing that is compromised. Sometimes brute force works, but sometimes a little creative hacking is necessary. ;)<p>Also, random things in my case which probably don't apply to you, but just in case, some factors to consider: allergies, proper glasses prescription, nasal obstruction (deviated septum). All those were things which I think exacerbated the condition, so it's helpful to rule those out. Or in the case of allergies, minimize the damage and identify the effects of various allergen seasons.<p>Good luck! You obviously have initiative, so I'm sure you will do just fine.

I recommend that you avoid thinking of yourself as having some kind of disease. The term "mental illness" is a sneaky and ill-defined term meant to put mental behaviors on a par with physical ailments. But in fact, all mental behaviors are adaptations to specific environments, and some are more effective than others (some aren't effective at all).<p>To refute this, one would have to start by identifying someone who died of a mental illness. Such things don't happen.<p>Also, the causative agents for real illnesses can be viewed in a microscope, which means they are present or absent as a matter of empirical fact. Mental illness diagnoses are dispensed through the opinions of psychologists, and psychologists are famous for not agreeing about anything.<p>The only people who benefit from the stigma of a "mental illness" are psychologists, who pretend to be doctors (which they aren't) able to offer meaningful treatments (which they can't) for the mental illnesses they have created by voting rather than research. All the new mental illnesses going into the new DSM (about to be published) were included there by secret votes, not evidence.<p>Imagine if real scientists behaved like psychologists: "Is there life on Mars? Rockets are expensive — let's vote!"

As someone who also was recently diagnosed I highly recommend seeking out a counselor and speaking with your doctor. After getting treatment for ADD I am much happier and productive at school and work. In general, I'm less stressed as well.<p>A therapist almost diagnosed me a couple years ago but I was biased against the idea of accepting that I had ADD. Of course, now I realize how much wasted time, money, and effort I might have saved if I had been willing to seek treatment the first time a psychologist suggested it to me. Counseling and medication have all been very helpful.<p>It's tough because it isn't well understood and the public has many wrong and negative impressions of ADD/ADHD. One of the toughest is of course that many people don't think it is real. However, personally, after a year of treatment looking at my life before and after being treated for ADD, it is clear that treatment worked for me. That really dispels that notion for me. If it walks like a duck and quacks like duck... My university also had a lot of great resources to help learn about ADD so check in with them as well.

I usually don't have a concentration problem. I plan things early and get things done before the deadline. I am also generally very persistent. These traits have brought me a long way. But I have my own problems. And my own problems have to do with anxiety and depression.. And things have gone really bad before.. And even now, it is still not that easy. The point I want to make is that everyone has weaknesses. In recognizing our own weaknesses, we could sympathize with others' weaknesses even though they are different from yours. Also most importantly we should not let our own weaknesses stop us from achieving our dreams..Weaknesses are just something we have to overcome in life. Seeking help, from professionals or from friends, is a way of finding out how we could overcome weaknesses. In short I think the most important thing is to recognize one's weaknesses and be motivated in trying to find ways to overcome them.

Just like some others here, I feel like I could have written this post myself. I was diagnosed w/ ADD at five and have only recently sought treatment (at age 34). I resisted the idea of taking meds for years but now I'm kicking myself for waiting so long to address the issue. My entire life, I've been limited to intellectual disciplines that I could assimilate w/in 48 hours or just BS my way through (liberal arts). If I had been able to read more than two pages w/o losing focus, things may have been different. Now I'm receiving treatment and for the first time in my life, I think that I might be able correct the problem (or at least mitigate it). For me, that means accepting that I can't do it without help.<p>My advice is to talk to more than one mental health professional. Try to keep an open mind about the different methods and combinations of methods used to treat ADD. Whatever you decide, do not wait to address the issue.

Exact same situation. I'm switching majors.<p>Edit: Another thought: Computer Science is boring as <i>hell</i>. Even the tiniest bit of ADD makes it impossible. Even a person without ADD will probably show some symptoms of it. Rather than figuring out ways to just "get through it", I think avoiding this situation altogether is a better solution.

I'm in an extremely similar situation to you. Here's my advice: if you're looking to get put on a medication (don't feel bad about feeling like you need it), start getting help now. I'm saying this because getting treatment for ADD is a LONG process. Once you're locked into the medical system, you're good, but it can be a hell of a time getting there.<p>1) If you're away from home and don't have a primary care doctor, get one. Like, right now. Depending on where you live, wait times for accepting new patients can vary between 1-3 months. They'll typically set up an introductory physical. Once you're there, explain to them that you think you have ADHD and want to discuss treatment options.<p>From there, the meeting can go one of two ways. The way you want it to go is for the doc/NP to start you on a trial medication.<p>On the other hand (and this happened to me), you may find that your primary care physician is either 1) entirely against ADHD medications and/or 2) won't prescribe them, instead requiring you to go to a psychiatrist. If this is the case, then you must start the 1-3 month waiting period all over again trying to get in with a psychiatrist. A shortcut here might just be to go directly to the psychiatrist, but depending on your insurance, that may not be possible.<p>Tips:<p>Don't bother getting help through your university. They get too many kids coming through there looking for easy Adderall and Vicodin, to the point where they treat everyone like drug addicts. Getting that kind of treatment from others can be really off-putting and make you feel bad about having ADHD. That's the last thing you need.<p>If you can't get meds through your primary care, make sure you see a <i>psychiatrist</i>, not a psychologist. If you call a mental health center that has a mix of psychiatrists, psychologists, and counsellors, make sure you <i>know</i> you're getting set up with a psychiatrist. You can still get diagnosed with ADHD by a psychologist, but they don't prescribe medication, so you'll have to wait another 1-3 months to meet with someone who can <i>after</i> you get diagnosed.

With one month to go in the last year of my computer science degree I was diagnosed with ADD.<p>The psychiatrist gave me some stunning advice: Ritalin or medication will not do your work for you. In my last month of university I was enabled with the ability to start working on projects well before the 48-hour cram period that I had come to know.<p>I had spent most of my schooling as a child to be made out as an idiot. As I result I'm now awfully quick to recognise when someone is not giving me their respect.<p>ADD is supposed to be picked up through your younger years. However when I grew up, it was the naughty children that had ADD/ADHD... they were the ones that caught their teachers attention.<p>Someone like me would never be correctly diagnosed, I has happy internalizing whatever it was that I was thinking about.

In addition to all the other advice you get, consider this:<p>It's a not a minor thing by any means, but it is at least a relatively common thing. You're not the first person to encounter this.<p>Unless you're a literature scholar, no one will look down on you for not having read War and Peace cover-to-cover.<p>You don't have to figure it all out right away. You have the rest of your life to figure out how to operate your head. Thinking about thinking is fun, but too much at once can be like eating too much candy.<p>Keep up your expectations for self-discipline, it's valuable and has gotten you this far. That's enough for most people, but you're different. So let yourself off the hook a bit judgmentally.<p>A lot of folks end up having fun with it.

Seriously, there's nothing wrong with seeing a psychologist and/or psychiatrist. There are many possible scenarios, including that something other than ADD is causing your symptoms, or even that there's nothing "wrong" with you. I think there are many good mental health professionals who focus on providing a minimal viable treatment for patients. Simply getting diagnosed with something doesn't mean you need to be medicated, and being diagnosed with something isn't even a necessary condition for a professional to help you find a way to help yourself succeed.

Thank you for sharing this, I am in a similar situation and often think this, however always fall back to the "I'm just being lazy train of thought".<p>I didn't actually make it through the exams that would allow me to study Computer Science, after studying hard I just couldn't concentrate when it came to the exam, I had plenty of time and knew it was important however couldn't focus. (I was like this throughout most of my education, good in class - failed the exams)<p>Perhaps this is just more excuses in a modern world full of distractions, either way I think I'll seek some professional advice.

Just as a heads up more serious mental illnesses have symptoms similar to ADD in there very early stages. Instead of self diagnosing with ADD do 2 things 1. get a real psychiatrist ( sorry to say but this person will probably not give you adderall, dex or Ritalin on your first visit). Get a nuero psychological exam done by a nuero scientist ( a real psychiatrist will be-able to connect you with one assuming you need one) Lots of people who think they had ADD in college go on to find out they have more serious conditions.

Things that may or may not help:<p>- exercise<p>- no sugar/low carb/paleo diet<p>- meditation<p>- ambient music / white noise<p>- small goals<p>- adderall<p>- modafinal<p>- cannabis<p>- seinfeld's "don't break the chain" method<p>- dont fight it, monetize it<p>good luck bro

Thank you so much for the overwelming response from the HN community. I will now spend the night going over all your responses. I'm going to book a counselling session through my university and hopefully they can give me some advice as to where to go from here.<p>Thanks so much

Wow - the hold it till the last minute thing rings incredibly true (to the point it has lost me jobs).<p>What is diagnosis like - is it rather hit and miss or are there clear physical signs? Off to read I guess.

wow! For once I thought "did I just write this?". This is just so me, I'm in my 2nd year, CS and 20. Guess what, I have the same problem. I got to thank you for posting this.

I found out that my case is more severe than you... But the comments here don't seem to come to any conclusion... Maybe I will find treatment as well..

I can definitely relate to what you said, and I think sharing my journey through academia may at the very least give you some ideas in how to approach yours.<p><i>TL;DR at bottom</i><p>Lots of the usual helpful advice has been given to you already (meditation, medication, exercise, diet, lifestyle), and I don't want to discount it by any means as it's all extremely helpful to try to achieve some kind of life balance through pursuit of better habits which can definitely help you become more focused. Instead I'm going to tell you what I've learned, as I was in a similar situation 9 years ago, though whether my lot has been improved much through experience is probably open to debate.<p>I was diagnosed with ADD when I was 8, though I've come to feel that the broad range of symptoms that the label is applied is less of a binary trait and more of a spectrum of behavioral characteristics that everyone can relate to, some more than others. If you feel like you have it, you probably do, though getting the official seal of "ADD" is probably only useful in that it gives you a venue to legally obtain medication to help mitigate it, as I did; working my way through the pharmacopoeia until I eventually settled into a grudging partnership with Adderall, which I took throughout high school. And it WAS very useful for extended periods of focus and crunching before tests and exams.<p>The one catch: I absolutely hated it. It made me feel disconnected, gave me a serious case of cottonmouth, gave me some serious bad breath, and made it nearly impossible to maintain a healthy sleep habit and diet. It's not something I would recommend except as an absolute last resort.<p>College can be a cruel first test of one's ability to balance their commitments. Personally I found the barrage of new things I had to deal with on my own for the first time overwhelming, and didn't last long at my first institution (UIUC). At the same time, I can say that many of my obstacles were things I chose. Making friends, going to parties, getting involved with student groups, and social activities were all things that I chose over applying myself towards my coursework. And here's the thing: <i>I learned a lot!</i> But not about the things I was being tested on.<p>I don't want to ramble on with obsessive detail, but I will say that I finally graduated 9 1/2 years after enrolling in 2003, though much of that time was spent not in school. Here's what would have saved my parents and I a lot of money: As soon as my interest waned, I should have taken time off. I didn't because of family pressure. There's a poignant quote somewhere about not playing if your head's not in the game, I'm sure, and I wish I had taken heed.<p>The thing is, all the time spent partying, travelling, working crappy minimum wage jobs, and living outside of the the very small world that concerns itself with minute improvements to the travelling salesman problem, and whether P = NP, gave me a perspective that has finally motivated me to pursue a self-driven education on computer-science-related topics that I never had until <i>my very last semester</i> of college (which was Fall 2012). Do I regret it? Sure, there are loads of things I'd do differently, but through the whole process I've developed extracurricular skills I value and am generally much happier and fulfilled person than I would have been if I had graduated in 2008.<p>So what I'm getting at in what I've realized is an extremely roundabout way, is that if you don't feel like you're really ready to dive into what you're learning headfirst, if you don't feel COMPELLED to... then don't. Take some time off and do something else that you want. Consider another major or career path. Learn to play an instrument. Heck, join a circus troupe. If you think your CS curriculum is tough now, just wait until your junior and senior years. That's when the difficulty really starts to adopt a tune that has the palatability of nails-on-a-chalkboard.<p>Because of pressure from my parents mainly, I kept going back when I <i>knew with all the fabric of my essence that I wasn't ready</i> and trying to half-ass my way through my classes. And I kept getting chewed up and spat out so to speak by the difficulty of the material. Seriously, I ended up failing core computer science classes repeatedly because my head wasn't in the game, because I didn't understand why the concepts I was learning were important, or applicable to anything I was interested in doing at the time, and because I truly just wasn't ready. It's like trying to bike up a steep hill without enough forward momentum. You need to be in high gear and ready to bring it.<p>So what finally got me interested in learning the material? I've always been fairly certain that I want to build things with code. I considered everything from music to writing to psychology in throes of self-doubt, but what it came down to in the end was that nothing excites me the way computer technology does, which fortuitously enough happened to be my intended major from the get-go. But I had to learn a lot about everything else the other academic disciplines, and life in general, had to offer before I was comfortable making that decision.<p>TL;DR, as promised:<p>-Unless you want to medicate yourself (which may be unhealthy in the long run), you may have to put higher ed on hold until you're feeling it (I should have).<p>-The degree isn't as important as the knowledge. Motivate yourself to learn things that you're interested in for now. As your base of knowledge grows, you may find that more and more of your interests overlap with a computer science curriculum. In that case, go for the degree again. If not, consider majoring in or studying something else.<p>-Consider taking some time off from any kind of classical academic learning and instead use this time for other personal and emotional growth and self-discovery. Work and support yourself, if you're not already. Go on an enormous road trip. Spend some time volunteering for a cause that resonates with you.<p>-If you do decide to continue with school full-time, then do whatever you can to make it your only commitment. Tell the band they have to find a new drummer. Tell your best friend to find a new wingman. <i>Move in with your parents if possible or get whatever financial aid you can so that you don't have to work while you're in school</i>. Seriously, with this last one. It sounds lame, but if it may be the only thing that can get you through your junior and senior years of CS.

You are looking for an excuse. Whether you have ADD or not, you are wuss-ing out.

Young people nowadays have so many things to cause distraction. When I was younger, we didn't have cellphones and the numerous electronic related items that cause you to lose focus. Try eliminating everything but the necessities, and then focusing on one thing at a time. Even if you get distracted, set a goal of going back to it even if it is for a very short amount of time. Just like a tree, keep chipping away at it, and eventually you will make it fall. You can go for medication, however, they can cause dependency, and can cause more issues in the long run.