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Ask HN: opinion on the landing page of my startup

2 pointsby needlemealmost 11 years ago
Hello,<p>it&#x27;s still in a test page<p>http:&#x2F;&#x2F;test.bluetouchdev.com&#x2F;<p>We&#x27;re about to officially launch the app at the end of June, with press release, video and everything - we&#x27;re actually already in the App Store, without any kind of promotion, pretty good results -<p>I&#x27;d love some honest opinions about the contents (correct grammar? I&#x27;m Italian!) and the general ideas and copywriting.<p>For example:<p>- the Advertising, is it good to &quot;promote&quot; it even if we still haven&#x27;t really started to work on it? Just planned how it will work.<p>- ask for a donation is a good thing? we don&#x27;t have any external funds, and for now we don&#x27;t have any revenue to pay servers and extras (we planned how to get revenue, but we need some months before launching the new features)<p>Best, Filippo<p>the contact form is not working at the moment.

4 comments

ColinWrightalmost 11 years ago
Clickety click ... <a href="http://test.bluetouchdev.com/" rel="nofollow">http:&#x2F;&#x2F;test.bluetouchdev.com&#x2F;</a><p>Personally, and I&#x27;m just speaking for myself, and I&#x27;m a curmudgeonly old man, I <i>hate</i> these swish, slick, things sliding in from here, there and everywhere, type of web pages.<p>Give me something to see, something to read, something to understand what you do, and a clear call for action in the case I&#x27;m your audience. This takes for<i>ever</i> to get to the point, and I&#x27;m still not sure I understand what you do.<p>I&#x27;m probably not in your demographic, but if I can&#x27;t see on the first page something, anything, to engage me, I&#x27;m out.<p>Pretty sure I&#x27;m not the only one. It&#x27;s an impatient audience you have, and without a clear something on the first view, you&#x27;ve lost them.<p>It&#x27;s gorgeous, though. Is that all you want?<p><i>Added in edit: In fact, pretty much everything I said in an earlier comment[0] applies to this too.</i><p>[0] <a href="https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=7839799" rel="nofollow">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;news.ycombinator.com&#x2F;item?id=7839799</a>
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daveymontoothalmost 11 years ago
There are some good points made here.<p>I would change the opening headline into a benefit to the immediate benefit for the reader. Something along the lines of:<p>&quot;Share your vinyl collection with the world and discover theirs&quot;<p>Then add a subtle pitch about Needle:<p>&quot;If you love vinyl, you&#x27;ll love Needle&quot;<p>After that, I would offer the call to action. Your current call to action needs some attention.<p>You have 2 buttons next to each other that are the same size. Both are ghost buttons. Both are asking the reader to take two different paths.<p>What do you want the user to do most?<p>I&#x27;m assuming you want them to download the app from the App Store. Make that button the biggest. Make it a solid color that pops out from the background. I would test both an Orange button and a Green button to see which gets the most clicks.<p>I would add the &quot;Available on the App Store&quot; to your Download button to add that immediate sense of security that this is a real verified app backed by Apple. Even though it isn&#x27;t, people get that impression and it helps to have it front and center with the action you want them to take.<p>I would change the &quot;Watch the Video&quot; button to a text link under the download button. That will be the indicator to let the visitor know that they can scroll down to see more. Add a downward arrow icon under it and you create a path to continue moving down for more information. Repeat that arrow throughout the page to create motion.<p>Back to the headline, I would remove the large logo and put your headline there. You have branding in the upper left corner. There&#x27;s really no need to repeat it, especially in that most important real estate.<p>Regarding the content, it could use a proof-read. I don&#x27;t mean any offense but it reads like English may not be your first language.<p>There are grammar issues here and there that could be cleaned up, for example:<p>&quot;we got lot of ideas&quot; should be &quot;we have a lot of ideas&quot; or &quot;we&#x27;ve got a lot of ideas&quot;.<p>I would move the Record Labels and Advertise to separate landing pages devoted to those features. This landing page should be about downloading the app and becoming part of a worldwide vinyl loving community.<p>If I were a vinyl enthusiast, I wouldn&#x27;t care about the record label part.<p>Though it isn&#x27;t necessary, I would add in some imagery or icons to the content. It&#x27;s pretty text heavy (even though the textual content is minimal).<p>For example, putting the &quot;Share&quot;, &quot;Dig&quot;, &quot;Stream&quot; content blocks next to each other with some nice related icons above the respective content would reader really well, catch people&#x27;s attention and visually shorten that content section.<p>I like that you used some language that is familiar to vinyl lovers. &quot;Dig through thousands of vinyl records...&quot; captures a real emotion for vinyl enthusiasts. Now if you had a nice illustration that helped bring it home, it would work well.<p>Last thing I would do is tweak the black and white background with the record. It doesn&#x27;t have enough contrast with the white text over it and you have to scroll up and down to read the content sometimes as the white text blends in with the white of the image.<p>Overall, it is a nice design. It has a hip feel to it in that it uses some current trends.<p>Good Luck with the app.
barryhandalmost 11 years ago
There are two conflicting call to actions on top of each other (app store &amp; scroll)<p>You don&#x27;t have to have lots of scroll to communicate your message.<p>See these examples for inspiration:<p>- <a href="https://www.chownow.com" rel="nofollow">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.chownow.com</a><p>- <a href="http://theweathertron.com" rel="nofollow">http:&#x2F;&#x2F;theweathertron.com</a><p>- <a href="http://human.co" rel="nofollow">http:&#x2F;&#x2F;human.co</a><p>- <a href="http://www.everest.com" rel="nofollow">http:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.everest.com</a>
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dopplesoldneralmost 11 years ago
Hi Filippo<p>Following up from from ColinWright&#x27;s comment, I&#x27;d also have liked a short &quot;About&quot; section which can describe in a couple of lines what the app does and how it helps users.<p>The design is nice but emphasize the content and you will be good.
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