I'd strongly encourage anyone who is upset or intrigued by this post to attend an open Al-Anon meeting[1]. (AA is for alcoholics, Al-Anon is for friends and family members of alcoholics. "Open" meetings mean that anyone curious is welcome to attend; otherwise you're expected to be affected by a friend or family member's drinking.)<p>TBH, the author seems remarkably nonjudgemental, given that her husband undeniably drank himself to death a few years ago. Alcoholism's pretty shitty all around.<p>[1]: <a href="http://www.al-anon.org/how-to-find-a-meeting" rel="nofollow">http://www.al-anon.org/how-to-find-a-meeting</a><p>edit: "drinking" originally was "alcoholism" but I edited it after posting. It's a small but important difference --- you don't have to believe that your family member is an alcoholic to attend an Al-Anon meeting; you just have to feel that their drinking is affecting you.<p>And, to be clear, this comment only reflects my opinion.
This guy had a meltdown, full stop. If alcohol hadn't been there for him, something else would have.<p>Don't get me wrong, alcohol is a nemesis of my own and I'm happy to point my finger at it when it's warranted but this guy wasn't looking for existential comfort from alcohol, he was shutting himself off (arguably with the intent of doing so permanently). This was suicide-by-booze, the "suicide" being the more relevant part here. The "booze" part could have been anything.
I found the piece very frustrating, because there's nothing about what drove him to alcoholism. I can't imagine that he was intentionally combining acetaminophen and alcohol to kill his liver. That's such a slow and painful way to die!<p>As I read, I kept expecting to see something about physical pain that he was suffering. But on the other hand, I recall a recent article about acetaminophen effectively numbing affect. So maybe it does a better job of that, when combined with alcohol.
Wow. Some people can write!<p>Edit: surprised by the downvote; for what it's worth, there is zero irony in this comment: I did find this piece very well written.
While I'm glad this is helping her to heal, I'm more interested in what could have been done.<p>Why in the world would someone suddenly start drinking at a level where it kills them? At age 45? This seems more like a mental health/depression spiral and the alcoholism was self-medication.<p>Especially since the word "professor" is being thrown around. If I remember correctly, there was some research that showed that men's hormones start going haywire when their partner goes into menopause. Combine this with the fact that a professor is always surrounded by young girls (professors have a higher divorce rate than average), and I have to wonder about a lot of things.<p>Ultimately, it's his own damn fault. But, mental illness has its own stigma.
What a bitter, twisted thing to write about a dead person.<p>It seems her husbands problems have become a large part of her identity, and what greater way to feel better than write an opinion piece about how shitty he was in the NYT?