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No One to Rescue Me from My Drinking

78 点作者 kareemm超过 9 年前

11 条评论

mdip超过 9 年前
I don&#x27;t know how effective Alcoholics Anonymous really is (not saying one way or the other), but having the accountability placed on you by friends is a helpful thing in many other tough situations in life. You can see it underlying many useful bits of advice (&quot;Have a cofounder&quot; always comes to mind -- someone to motivate you when you&#x27;re unable to do so yourself, perhaps?)<p>Addiction is no joke and anything that can provide relief or help to those who have found themselves caught up in it would be a huge thing. I always think back to a former friend of mine who battled with opiates. She lost her family and children -- well after she had completed a recovery program and been sober for a year. When she started with pills there was a very good reason -- several surgeries and a lot of pain management. When the pain was well and gone, she was left with a strong addiction. The woman she was before she started popping pills regularly and the woman she is now (completely sober) are different people. She told me that long term opiate addiction changes your brain chemistry in such a way that depression becomes a way of life -- I&#x27;m not sure if that&#x27;s true, but it looks like it is with her. The worst part is that her marriage problems started well after she had cleaned up. Her husband, still a friend, said he couldn&#x27;t stand the woman she&#x27;d become and confessed to me that he sometimes wished she&#x27;d never stopped. Before the judgement starts, he&#x27;s a solid guy and I stand by his decision to fight for full custody of his children (you&#x27;d have to understand the whole story which I can&#x27;t do justice to here).<p>Her description of addiction still haunts me, though. She said &quot;you need it like you need food after having not eaten for a week&quot;. She&#x27;s done a week long fast (as have I). She&#x27;d know. That description is the only thing I&#x27;ve heard that adequately explains why addicts will put their children in harms way if it means getting their next fix (ever wonder why cigarette prices can go up 600% in two years and people still smoke?). I watched her become completely broke buying pills from scary people in scary places. I&#x27;ve heard from others some of the things she was willing to do to get enough pills to get her through a day; it&#x27;s way beyond what you already couldn&#x27;t imagine a suburban mother of 4 doing.
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madaxe_again超过 9 年前
Ah, this rang so many bells. My ex of ten years ago drank huge amounts and was in utter denial about there even being a possibility of a problem. I used to have to go out and find her, usually asleep in an alley, or passed out in a bar&#x27;s toilets - the worst occasion was when she threw a brick at me, as I had come to pry her away from a bar, and the recoil sent her tumbling into the Thames, in December - fished her out - and the next morning she was convinced I had pushed her in. Stabbed me with a stiletto heel a few months later, because I was trying to stop her hurling our furniture from a fifth story window.<p>Ultimately we broke up as it&#x27;s remarkably easy to bamboozle a drunk into admitting that yes, they have cheated on you dozens of times with dozens of men.<p>This woman is a high court judge now. As far as I can tell, most barristers and judges are full blown alcoholics. For some reason I loved her - probably in the same way as I love my three legged cat - broken, piteous things, both.<p>I suppose the point of where I&#x27;m going is that the only person who can rescue you is yourself. I tried for far too long for both of our sakes.
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meesles超过 9 年前
This is a very beautiful story, but not very thought-provoking and it doesn&#x27;t really offer anything new. (To me, at least)
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siliconc0w超过 9 年前
On a similar topic - AA actually isn&#x27;t that effective: <a href="http:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.salon.com&#x2F;2014&#x2F;03&#x2F;23&#x2F;the_pseudo_science_of_alcoholics_anonymous_theres_a_better_way_to_treat_addiction&#x2F;" rel="nofollow">http:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.salon.com&#x2F;2014&#x2F;03&#x2F;23&#x2F;the_pseudo_science_of_alcoho...</a><p>I haven&#x27;t read the book the above article is covering but it seems Dodes argues psychotherapy is a better alternative as &#x27;addiction&#x27; is usually just a manifestation of self-destructive&#x2F;self medication behavior ultimately due to untreated psychological issues. In this OP&#x27;s case this is looks like it was depression - though it&#x27;s unclear if she is seeking treatment outside of AA.
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billjings超过 9 年前
I have a short list of books that I recommend that have changed my worldview. First and foremost on that list is Bruce Alexander&#x27;s _The Globalization Of Addiction_: <a href="http:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.amazon.com&#x2F;The-Globalization-Addiction-Poverty-Spirit&#x2F;dp&#x2F;0199588716" rel="nofollow">http:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.amazon.com&#x2F;The-Globalization-Addiction-Poverty-Sp...</a><p>If you&#x27;ve got the bug, that book is not going to help you. It&#x27;ll just tell you how screwed you are. If you don&#x27;t have the bug, I think that book might help you understand the problem.
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siliconc0w超过 9 年前
On a similar topic - AA actually isn&#x27;t that effective: <a href="http:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.salon.com&#x2F;2014&#x2F;03&#x2F;23&#x2F;the_pseudo_science_of_alcoholics_anonymous_theres_a_better_way_to_treat_addiction&#x2F;" rel="nofollow">http:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.salon.com&#x2F;2014&#x2F;03&#x2F;23&#x2F;the_pseudo_science_of_alcoho...</a><p>I haven&#x27;t read the book the above article is covering but it seems Dodes argues psychotherapy is a better alternative as &#x27;addiction&#x27; is usually just a manifestation of self-destructive&#x2F;self medication behavior ultimately due to untreated psychological issues. In this OP&#x27;s case this is looks like depression.
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tossit123超过 9 年前
weird that she just flat breaks AA tradition 11 &quot;we need always maintain personal anonymity at the level of press, radio, and films.”<p>The reason this is so important is that should this woman have a &quot;slip&quot; - which LOTS of alcoholics do - now the world, and needy alcoholics, have one more reason to dismiss AA.<p>Try it before you judge it.<p>AA finds u when u need it, not to be traded for a drunkalog to generate page views.
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jheriko超过 9 年前
i wonder if this was a man how the story would go.<p>much worse i&#x27;d imagine :&#x2F;
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Nadya超过 9 年前
TL;DR being &quot;You can lead a horse to fresh water but you can&#x27;t make it drink.&quot;<p>Or in this case; not drink.<p>I agree with meesles sentiment.
aaron695超过 9 年前
This article to me is about depression not alcohol addiction as the author points out -<p>&gt; The absence of alcohol revealed that my “dark soul” was the manifestation of a decades-long depression. Booze had masked its diagnosis while also egging it on.<p>They to me are more talking about binge drinking.<p>I&#x27;m not sure an addict can just go to one AA meeting and stop. Sure it&#x27;s possible, but to me they didn&#x27;t sound like an addict, more self destructive.
Animats超过 9 年前
Note the total lack of self-blame, or taking responsibility for one&#x27;s own problems. Even the title, &quot;No One to Rescue Me from My Drinking&quot;, puts the blame on someone, anyone, else.
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