Facebook’s friendship trap

I don't think that Facebook necessarily encourages people to have a second-rate experience. Rather, it acts as a sink for people who would have had a second-rate experience anyway, and still manages to be a tool that serves people who are more ambitious with their lives.<p>The author compares a very idealistic picture of friendship sans Facebook, with a realistic look at friendship with Facebook, and the former is certain to win, but long before Facebook very many people were busy with keeping appearances and combating loneliness with meaningless drivel.<p>A better approach would be to research the positive ways in which Facebook can be used to foster real friendship and add meaning and purpose to one's life and publish recommendations to people so that they can fine-tune their use of such tools.

"The psychologist Dr Aric Sigman says that social networking sites undermine social skills and the ability to read body language. Actual physical contact benefits our wellbeing by boosting levels of the hormone oxytocin. In fact, being lonely is as bad for your health as smoking."<p>Aric Sigman has a previously spoken on the matter and has had most of his points debunked already, see Ben Goldacre's post here:<p><a href="http://www.badscience.net/2009/02/the-evidence-aric-sigman-ignored/" rel="nofollow">http://www.badscience.net/2009/02/the-evidence-aric-sigman-i...</a>

I don't think this article gives nearly enough credence to the amazing pool of information that Facebook is. It's brilliant for organising social events and keeping track of people, it doesn't have to be a great evil. Used responsibly it is on of the best things about the internet.<p>"Moderation in all things"

<i>The very language of sites such as Facebook, with its “Would you like to add me as a friend?” lexicon, undermines what real friendship is. I’m not surprised kids are lonely if a whole generation thinks friends can be made by clicking on an icon, and that it’s normal to have hundreds of pals. We all know that many of our “friends” are nothing of the sort; the bulk of them are acquaintances or people we hung out with years ago or former colleagues or contacts.</i><p>Agreed - and hence why I can see my LinkedIn account staying around (and used) for a good while, whereas my FB account should be (finally) deleted any...day...now.

This is more an attack on the nature of social networks than an attack on Facebook. Friendster had the same problems (particularly the loneliness bit - because you visit friend profiles filled with happysmiley party pictures and so feel rather left out) and on that I have to agree.<p>I must note, however, that much of what the writer talks about really only applies to teenagers. Metrics like popularity (measured by friendcounts) are meaningless when you're older.

Disagree. This is exactly why terms like "We're friends on Facebook" exist, which effectively means "I can remember seeing their face online".

Agreed. Facebook promotes a fake friendship that isn't substantiated by any real human interaction; it's cerebral at best.

I have to say, anyone who thinks that Facebook has passed its usefulness is not a college student--and if they are they don't have a lot of friends in varied disciplines. Facebook is the social staple of college social life in general and Greek life in particular.

Another article which confuses the media attention a story receives with the actual feelings of most people.

The author states that she adds anyone she has met, then seems off-put that her Facebook feed is full of people and information she doesn't care about. Perhaps she needs to learn to group people. Or just not accept all friendship requests.<p>What I find strangely absent in public discourse on the subject is that it's still unusual to actually <i>meet</i> people via social technology. I'm not talking about adding people to your Mafia Wars crew, but actually using Facebook as a tool to meet people more compatible than you are ever likely to stumble across in real life.<p>We nervously broach the subject of online dating, but across-the-board real-world socializing via technology seems to be virtually nonexistent.

This article is so sickeningly off-base that I don't even want to talk about how wrong it is.