Tweet Less, Kiss More

I live on a boat, and sometimes I sail out, throw an anchor somewhere and just enjoy the silence for a few days. No phone, no television, no Internet. Nothing.<p>It's absolutely wonderful. There's time to think through problems, time to reflect on life and time to think about new ideas. I can also drink my morning coffee not caring how I look or sound.<p>When I come back I'm refreshed and have an inner peace that's somewhat hard to describe. But getting totally away from everything every once in a while is recommendable.

I like this article, and can definitely resonate with it—like just a night ago when my phone was out of battery while attending a dance night, and instead of texting on my phone when I was standing on the sidelines, I instead observed the styles and techniques of others on the floor.<p>But this isn't the entire story. We have to look at what's <i>really</i> behind our desire to become attached to technology. It's not the devices themselves that we're attached to, it seems like—more like what they do.<p>The guy that has his laptop propped up in the driver seat probably detests his boring commute and how annoying radio ads are, and is looking for more entertainment in his daily commute. The lunch party friends are texting because even though they're meeting with their friends in person—there are others that they'd like to improve their relationship with, or just generally enjoy talking with.<p>Has technology's enabling of making us more connected with each other—that everyone's but a text message or email away using a block of plastic and metal in our pocket with an improvised lightbulb on it—really improved our friendships and our connections with each other? That's the real question we have to answer before writing off technology as something that's simply disrupting our personal relations. In real life, yes, it is a disruption, but is the value of being connected worth it?

An effective, easy to implement policy that has made me happier is the no cell phone rule when eating, period. It's nice when I'm eating solo and even nicer when I'm eating with someone else.<p>Fun Fact: My mother clipped this article out and snail mailed it to me from east coast -&#62; SF. I received it 3 days ago. Maybe being connected doesn't put you ahead of the curve.

Sometimes technology can be a life saver. Let me explain; I don't have an extremely congenial home environment. It's mostly screams, accusations and put downs mixed with intermittent periods of affection (I've managed to end the violence). I've been told by my parents that I am not good enough to exist, and I am not worth the money they spend on me. My biological father once made out a huge list of my monthly expenses and gave them to me saying that I wasn't worth it and I might as well get out of the house.<p>I desperately needed an escape, a safe place to go to and the internet gave me just that. It allowed me to connect to different groups of people with different views on life and love. I met a friend of a friend online and she was there for me through a lot of bad nights. If it hadn't been for her I wouldn't be typing this right now. I learnt from people like lionhearted, or my sister and made relationships with some amazing people which I hope will last a lifetime.<p>To an outside observer I am a slave of technology, but is that so? This same medium allows me to learn and self reflect, while staying afloat in the endless sea of emotional chaos.<p>I think that technology by itself isn't the problem. I still read books like anything and I swear by The Magic Mountain by Thomas Mann. Whether you use it or abuse it depends upon the type of person you are. So maybe the answer isn't as simple as solitude, but the types of solitudes we choose.

I can easily agree that people shouldn't be talking on the phone while driving or watching a dvd while in traffic, but only because it is dangerous and reckless, but I could care less that it is dangerous and reckless to the driver; I care because I am a driver and those kind of people are endangering others on the road like ME. I personally love both technologies and only dislike the people that use them. I don't find this to be a technological problem, but a people problem; certainly not a “technology controlling society” problem neither.<p>“Twittering, tweeting — whatever it is, it sounds like a nervous disorder.” The clear fallacy, which is meant to distract, takes away from what is really going on. I hang out with people I like, and I like them because of who they are. Having a cell phone on the table and texting/tweeting does <i>not</i> change who they are as people, and if it has, I guess I like that changed person <i>more</i>.<p>This 'busy' life the author is complaining about where the tv set is cluttered by unrelated information and multitasking is now known as a wonderful skill.....is the life I wish to live, and I find it awesome. I enjoy commercials and laugh at the obvious marketing techniques ect. It even has become something to do with friends when we have a television show we both enjoy. “We need to slow down and take a deep breath.” No, we don't! You do! Time to adapt, for you can't make others adapt.<p>“spend a little time just being ourselves.” imho, I already made it clear I judge people on who they are, not if they have the newest cell phone or not. I like people who are themselves? Those people who 'are not' themselves will find themselves eventually. I don't even know if people who are not themselves exist-<p>imho, this piece was negligent/shallow rant on technology. I can't agree with it on a whole and when I do agree- I agree for different reasons.

The most important skills for children of this generation to learn will be discipline and reflection.

I've realized that I need to sit back in silence more - just with the music alone, I'm killing my ability to think hard and long in silence. And the best thoughts seem to come out of those opportunity's that I seldom take.

The article seems a bit alarmist to me. One person on the phone in traffic and someone who watches movies on their laptop while driving? These don't seem indicative of the common case to me. As far as his complaints about cell phone overuse, the fact is that most people don't have much to say. Most situations like the one he described are long and relatively boring. Is keeping your self occupied such a bad thing?

Over the last six months, I have been traveling back and forth to beijing for 2.5 months at a time. When in beijing, I don't have a phone, let-a-lone a smart phone. The one thing I have noticed is that I used to go to my phone anytime there was a millisecond of downtime, in line, waiting for a check...<p>Now, I just sit and watch the world that is around me, and I find the real-world local to me is way more interesting than what is happening on techcrunch, perezhilton...<p>There is some much information being created and consumed that whether intended to be or not it's really just become entertainment.

Twitter, texting, cell phones, etc. don't cause rudeness, they just make it more obvious.

Every day, I check my email box, i check my twitter account. But, it is really useless for me. Because no one reply to me on twitter, no one write to me by email. But, i am addict to it, how can i help myself to get out of it?

"I was about to move to the center lane to get out of her way when she suddenly swerved into that lane herself to pass me on the right — still chatting away."<p>Why were you in the left lane if you weren't passing anyone? Starting an article with misplaced righteous indignation is off-putting.

Why is he picking a fight with the Kindle? Isn't reading when we'd otherwise be completely idle a good thing?

Would he complain about a person driving up behind him that was having a conversation with her friend in the back seat? Sure, but he wouldn't be able to label it a tech problem. Were brokers on the NYSE in 1950 not multitasking?<p>I also don't understand why integrated Bluetooth in the car hasn't taken over yet. The US spent over $1B just in the first week of cash for clunkers. They could have bought a ton of aftermarket Bluetooth devices instead (or gone nanny state and made it a mandatory feature) and maybe saved some lives.

On a related topic "Your Brain on Computers Hooked on Gadgets, and Paying a Mental Price" <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2010/06/07/technology/07brain.html" rel="nofollow">http://www.nytimes.com/2010/06/07/technology/07brain.html</a> is a very interesting read.

The problem isn't multitasking, it's a biological substrate that isn't really very good at it. We have awesomely parallel brains but our narrow input bandwidth and lack of multiplexing is becoming increasingly a bottleneck.

Once or twice a month, I keep all accessories at home and just head out in jeans/t-shirt, carrying some amount of money. Not carrying your phone/watch/wallet gives a different sense of freedom and the surroundings.

This is the modern equivalent of yelling at kids to get off of your lawn.

Bob Herbert: Get off my lawn...