Kudos to the author for being honest with their struggles being a parent and a full-time employee. I've encountered similar struggles, especially during hard times (major health issues with my wife, specifically) that ended with me being forced out of a position and company I had been with for 10+ years.<p>It was a difficult, dark time, that's still resolving itself. Having gone through that experience, you question whether you still have the ability to focus as you once did. That, plus the obvious changes that come as you get older, has been difficult to grapple with.<p>Thankfully, I am now at a company with decent work/life balance and very understanding team. I still suffer from a sort of PTSD, though, where I am always doubting whether the kind words I receive from co-workers and managers are just window dressing and wondering when the other shoe will drop.<p>If OP is here, just know that you aren't alone. I hope you find peace and enjoy this time with your kids.