I prefer the alternate article title,<p><i>Charlie Warzel fancies himself Elon's better</i><p>Best paired with the following tabloid byline:<p><i>(in desperate bid to ingratiate himself into Musk's favor, insiders say Warzel's sad plan is to lure the sugar daddy on the promise of his tumescent intellect, as he secretly seeks respite from debt woes and perceived irrelevance)</i>