Boy oh boy. Children are free to express their preferences. Parents can't reasonably say that their child isn't allowed to share a preference, or at least that a school or its employees prevent them from sharing a preference. And parents can of course request that the school employees not honor their preference, but why isn't that preference a matter between the student and employee? It's pretty disturbing to think that parents think they own their children, especially an 11-year-old. Schools hiding things from parents as policy is another matter. If a parent wants to own their child, they can home-school to ensure that no real-world interactions or growth take place.