They can pry my iPhone Mini from my cold, dead hands.<p>I mean, what reason do I have to upgrade, even if I wanted a phone the size of a skateboard? Better camera? Eh...I'm trying really hard make that a reason to layout $800, but I'm failing. Faster chip? My phone isn't slow the way it is now. I don't do iOS work anymore, so there goes that excuse for an upgrade. And let's face it: the novelty of smartphones has worn off. The iPhone was released seventeen years ago. It's not awesome new tech, it's the appliance that I carry around so that $PEOPLE_IMPORTANT_TO_ME can get hold of me, and I can check the weather. I'm otherwise about as excited about a new one as I am about a new washer. (Well, probably <i>less</i> excited, because our new washer/dryer all-in-one is awesome.)<p>A top-level comment says battery. When Apple will no longer plop a new battery in my Mini for $80, I guess <i>that's</i> when I'll upgrade. Or Apple could, you know, make another Mini.