You could just choose optimism

I&#x27;ve discovered that the people I most enjoy being around are those that are authentically optimistic. Not those that are blind to everything negative, and not those who are faking it to ameliorate themselves, but those who are encouraged by the opportunity for a better tomorrow. Astonishingly, these are often people that have suffered overwhelming personal tragedy. I&#x27;ve also noticed that the more time I spend around these people, the more emotionally resilient I become myself to difficulties.<p>There seems to be common sentiment that being optimistic is somehow ignorant or otherwise insidious. Maybe this is true, but I am already too familiar with the acute pain that comes with a life entrenched in pessimism to allow myself to fall into that spiral.

From Carl Jung:<p>&gt; By not being aware of having a shadow, you declare a part of your personality to be non-existent. Then it enters the kingdom of the non-existent, which swells up and takes on enormous proportions…If you get rid of qualities you don’t like by denying them, you become more and more unaware of what you are, you declare yourself more and more non-existent, and your devils will grow fatter and fatter.<p>You can&#x27;t &quot;optimism away&quot; the &quot;negative&quot; emotions. You just bury them, but they continue to live in your system, and find their own ways out eventually.<p>It&#x27;s easy to fall into the trap of endless negativity. It&#x27;s also easy to fall into the trap of toxic positivity, where you refuse to process pain or the &quot;negative&quot; because you&#x27;re trying so hard to force the positive.

The way text resizes on that website is so strange. It&#x27;s actually amazing how awful it is. Like they went out of their way to ensure it resizes in the most ridiculous possible manner. And the zoom on my browser does nothing. Absolutely amazing.

This is one of those excellent articles that nicely synthesises lots of your own less articulate thoughts<p>Also, I forwarded it to my wife…

Isn’t this article complaining about complaints? Does that make it paradoxical?<p>I think complaints, even gossipy ones, hold value. I agree with the general premise that it’s easier to complain, but in the hotel towel footnote honestly I’d complain to my friends because it’s a story to tell, not because I expect them to actually avoid the hotel. Misery loves company.

I&#x27;m living (temporarily) with someone who obsessively watches the news on TV. And not the good news. The trashy, commercial-channel news.<p>&#x27;Oh who cares about this rubbish!&#x27;, they&#x27;ll say to the screen. Or &#x27;who cares about these people, why do we need to see this?&#x27;, or &#x27;why do we give these people attention?&#x27;.<p>As someone who identifies as an optimist – and who hasn&#x27;t watched any form of TV news in decades – I find it interesting.

I’d been a cynical and nervous wreck for early part of my life. And I still get episodes of paralysing gloom and doom. Something I often I tell myself is “despite” all the [negative things], I will be a positive force in the world and that is something to be proud of. It is easy to be positive during good times and it is difficult to be positive in hard times, but it’s worth it _because_ it’s hard. I’ve never been a religious person, but I’ve been thinking more and more about religious allegories and how it fits this mindset.<p>Anyhow, there is something about the word “despite”(그럼에도) that rings my soul. So I mutter it to myself all the time.

I generally understand the idea of being less complaining and more pleasant better for yourself and others; but especially from the second half of the writing I got the feeling that the writing suggests no complaining at all. I am all for in for good complaining: shouldn&#x27;t we complain about the actual bad things? If someone is evil, or complaining about dictators.. And the examples he gave particularly sounds like the author(s) is in for shittification and blackwashing.<p>&gt; There are entire YouTube channels dedicated to complaining about Disney’s Star Wars. When the video game Assassin’s Creed: Shadows was announced, thousands of people spent large chunks of their lives whining about it online.

Optimism is the only choice for many of us. Especially for those trying to find work in this slump, persistence pays off in the end.<p>The voice of Nature loudly cries, And many a message from the skies, That something in us never dies:<p>- Robert Burns

&gt; Choosing optimism may feel cheesy, even embarrassing, at first.<p>Just go on the hike. Tell others you&#x27;re going if you&#x27;d like, maybe they&#x27;ll go too, but saying &quot;it might be fun...&quot; feels something like a complaint. &quot;I pride myself on being optimistic, so of course I have to mention how everyone else is being pessimistic.&quot; That&#x27;s why it feels embarrassing.

Getting stuck in traffic is a terrible experience because you&#x27;re almost entirely helpless. The only choice you have is whether or not to complain. Complaining can be very cathartic, but it can also get you down. If you can&#x27;t help but complain—or won&#x27;t let yourself complain—your single degree of freedom is lost, and you become totally helpless.<p>I wouldn&#x27;t say &quot;don&#x27;t complain&quot;—just be mindful about complaining. It&#x27;s a choice worth thinking about.<p>&gt; There is, for example, a common sentiment among younger generations that their ability to purchase a home is completely out of their hands. [...] Some of those talking points might be true. But are they useful?<p>This is an unfortunate type of anti-politics. It actually does matter whether this is true—it affects how we run our society. Dwelling on unpleasant truths is not good for you, but ignoring them is bad for all of us.

This is bait for complainers.

<a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;standardebooks.org&#x2F;ebooks&#x2F;rudyard-kipling&#x2F;just-so-stories&#x2F;text&#x2F;the-butterfly-that-stamped" rel="nofollow">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;standardebooks.org&#x2F;ebooks&#x2F;rudyard-kipling&#x2F;just-so-st...</a>

There’s an article recently posted about a violin built in a concentration camp.<p>Talk about optimism…<p>The point is that someone in bad circumstances can focus on the task and the horror of what they endure can subside.<p>It’s definitely possible to choose optimism and end up improving one’s situation.

You often can&#x27;t choose what happens to you, but you can always choose how you react.

&quot;I wish there were more good role models of this behavior. Or maybe there are, and I’m too much of a grouchy complainer to see them. Who comes to mind for you?&quot;<p>Immediately thought of, and could not stop thinking of the Calvin &amp; Hobbes camping trip. <a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;static.wikia.nocookie.net&#x2F;candh&#x2F;images&#x2F;3&#x2F;30&#x2F;8-16.gif&#x2F;revision&#x2F;latest?cb=20120215033025" rel="nofollow">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;static.wikia.nocookie.net&#x2F;candh&#x2F;images&#x2F;3&#x2F;30&#x2F;8-16.gif...</a>

Article still here: <a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;web.archive.org&#x2F;web&#x2F;20250501180905&#x2F;https:&#x2F;&#x2F;quarter--mile.com&#x2F;You-Could-Just-Choose-Optimism" rel="nofollow">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;web.archive.org&#x2F;web&#x2F;20250501180905&#x2F;https:&#x2F;&#x2F;quarter--...</a>

This guy decided that people fall into two categories: those who always complain and those who never do. But in reality, people might complain about some things while being quite satisfied with others, so it’s not a binary state. And if there’s no binary state, the point of the article falls apart.

Optimism, pessimism, meh. In the tradition of tech, I choose skepticism. Two old guys ordering champagne on flights, a couple weeks apart, perfectly embodying the issue of the essay? Reads like a Just So story to me, better suited to LinkedIn.

It depends. If someone complains about something and then fixes it, I’ll take them over the toxic optimist. There is nothing inherently wrong with complaining, what matters is the intent behind it. A complaint can be constructive, mean, funny, or any other number of good or bad things.

Kind of ironic that TFA came after their previous piece.<p>&gt;I Literally Don’t Know<p>&gt;TL;DR: You don’t need to pick my brain, or probably anyone’s brain, for general life advice. It won’t help.<p>Overall the Optimism piece is just long-form LinkedIn garbage. What insights does it present? Complaining bad, optimism good, not all complaining is bad, but complaining is mostly bad? OK..<p>Improvements rarely start with &quot;I&#x27;m satisfied with this&quot;. Writing off complaining because one conflates complaining with misery is silly.

I mostly agree but sometimes you have to complain and persistently too:<p>“The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man.”<p>George Bernard Shaw

It&#x27;s probable that most complainers are optimists. Why complain unless you think it will help somehow?<p>How can you make things better if you have nothing to complain about?<p>If you don&#x27;t think things can be better, are you really an optimist?

hmmm, the example of people complaining about Disney Star Wars - they took something beloved and shat on it for cheap $ - I&#x27;d like the people watching a new Star Wars to get the wonder I got out of eps 4-5-6. The fact that the ruined that feels worth mentioning. That said, I just wrote it out of my life and moved on.<p>Is the South Park episode about Indiana Jones ep4 complaing?<p><a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.southparkstudios.com&#x2F;episodes&#x2F;zwjhca&#x2F;south-park-the-china-probrem-season-12-ep-8" rel="nofollow">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.southparkstudios.com&#x2F;episodes&#x2F;zwjhca&#x2F;south-park-...</a>

Being optimistic is normally a good strategy for success, but it doesn&#x27;t feel appropriate in dire circumstances, such as at the onset of World War 2. 70+ million people died, not to mention all the injuries, crimes, and environmental destruction. Saying &quot;Think positive, the Allies will win!&quot; in 1939 would have rung hollow. Instead of optimism, there needs to be a grim determination.<p>I put that statement to ChatGPT, and it reminded me of Churchill&#x27;s &quot;We Shall Fight on the Beaches&quot;[0] speech, which is defiant, rather than optimistic.<p>Once again we seem to be in dire circumstances, on the brink of colossal ruin, owing the the whims of a handful toxic people, and the ignorance of so many who put them into power. I&#x27;m not at all optimistic, but I can try for grim determination.<p>[0] <a href="https:&#x2F;&#x2F;winstonchurchill.org&#x2F;resources&#x2F;speeches&#x2F;1940-the-finest-hour&#x2F;we-shall-fight-on-the-beaches&#x2F;" rel="nofollow">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;winstonchurchill.org&#x2F;resources&#x2F;speeches&#x2F;1940-the-fin...</a>

Optimism vs pessimism is a false dichotomy. Anyone can phrase any question in the format of a yes&#x2F;no or as for&#x2F;against, and this is very frequently just a way of controlling the entire direction of the conversation.<p>A realist would talk about pros&#x2F;cons together, possibly in equal measure, and possibly not, and will actively resist absolute categorization of the remarks. A skeptic would ask, is your specific degree of optimism&#x2F;pessimism on this thing warranted, and is this even the thing we want to be talking about? By comparison.. Why would you ever want to talk to an optimist <i>or</i> a pessimist, much less aspire to be either one?

Frankly, I just don&#x27;t see how any sort of optimism can survive the moment you step out of the house.<p>It goes beyond the internet. The real world is an excruciating parade of torture, and no amount of self-platitudes or of positive thoughts will change the reality of the situation.<p>Sure, you can try and not have anxiety. Live in the moment. But someone is eventually going to take advantage of that and you&#x27;ll be worse off. That can only happen so many times before you start reevaluating your thoughts, intentions aside.<p>Personally, the only times I&#x27;ve ever felt good about the world and how everything was going to be okay have been when I&#x27;m using opioids, hidden away in a corner of my room.

When, in the history of everything, has anyone <i>ever</i> &#x27;just&#x27;

I will happily read concrete advice on how to be optimistic and less negative. It’s amazing how much of your day—could be your whole day—can be preoccupied with negative thoughts. That just go nowhere; worry is negativity without action or planning. So let’s hear that. Journaling? Practicing the m-word?<p>But this article provides nothing. I was thinking that the article might have a clickbait “just do it” because they have some neat hack to switch your perspective. They don’t. Just be the opposite of a complainer.<p>Not to mention that complaining has a social and psychological function. Do you have any idea how terrible it is to live in an environment where you think certain things are awful but airing it seems impossible because, you know, it might just be <i>you</i>? Then someone else complains to you and you realize that you’re not alone? Well of course you have. That’s the human experience unless you are a complete optimistic outlier.<p>Complaining in moderation serves a function. Yes and I do mean complaining. Not just matter of factly bringing up issues in an objective manner and then perishing the negative thoughts to the void.[1] There are socially appropriate ways to complain (like to your friends about the hotel, not venting to random hotel staff).<p>And if you complain too much you need to cut down on that. But this article won’t help with that.<p>&gt; There is, for example, a common sentiment among younger generations that their ability to purchase a home is completely out of their hands. The boomer generation fucked them, the government isn’t helping, and that’s that. No home, no retirement. People complain as if it’s already been decided.<p>Who’s really the 60-year-old champagne drinker here?<p>[1] Do they really perish though? Or do they stew subconsciously?

After 40+ years of life experience I understand why some people fall to their knees daily and <i>beg</i> for mercy. If getting champagne or a latte or whatever is enough to scratch your itch I applaud you. I envy you.

Too much optimism isn&#x27;t good either. Some things are just shit, and you should avoid them.

Thanks, a helpful reminder.

I did. It&#x27;s great.

“Has it occurred to Thomas that he might be the problem?”<p>Biggest laugh I’ve had all week!

I, for one, find joy and humor in my complaining.

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