Why Startup Founders are Always Unhappy

If there is one thing I dislike more than self-help, it's self-help based on anecdotal evidence from one person with no background in psychology. Even more so when the title of a post states an extreme personal hypothesis as if it were a fact obvious to everyone.<p>If you want to know more about happiness from a scientific point of view, read or listen to experts like Daniel Kahneman. For example:<p><a href="http://www.ted.com/talks/daniel_kahneman_the_riddle_of_experience_vs_memory.html" rel="nofollow">http://www.ted.com/talks/daniel_kahneman_the_riddle_of_exper...</a>

I never understand this. Where are all these unhappy founders?<p>I'm a startup founder myself and I naturally know many others. This is the best thing that could have ever happened to me. Yes, it's stressful. No, I don't know what will happen tomorrow. Yes, it's a lot of work.<p>But I can tell you one thing. I wake up every day wanting to do one thing: go to the office and work until midnight. Again, this is the best thing that has ever happened to me.<p>And every other startup founder that I know is the same way.

In addition to "Remember where you came from," I'd also add: track regular, incremental progress. Entrepreneurs have a tendency to move from big win to big win, while forgetting all of the little steps that got them to that point.<p>Keeping track of daily or weekly progress (even as simple as iDoneThis), can help minimize the amplitude of the downswing. It will still be there. It's inevitable. But this can help take some of the sting out of the low points.

I've been a startup founder of one form or another for pretty much my whole adult life.<p>I have stress or anxiety when things are up in the air (positive or negative), but happiness or unhappiness has a lot more to do with factors other than the startup. Mostly because I believe in expected value and statistics -- there's a lot of randomness in everything, and you can do things which influence probabilities substantially, but if you've done that and there's an 80% chance of a good outcome, the actual result doesn't mean you're doing well or poorly as much as whether the odds were 80% or 30%.<p>My goal is to try to use skill, connections, effort, etc. to raise the expected returns as much as possible, then just take a lot of shots to get the right returns. Worry before things are resolved, not after.

I always thought it was tied to the creative's dilemma: what we can imagine is amazing, yet always just beyond what we actually produce. So by the time you produce something amazing it's "old news"... and your imagination has grown 10 steps ahead.

"I'm generalizing from one example, here, but everyone generalizes from one example. At least, I do."<p>- Vladimir Taltos (<a href="http://dragaera.wikia.com/wiki/Vlad_Taltos" rel="nofollow">http://dragaera.wikia.com/wiki/Vlad_Taltos</a>, see also <a href="http://lesswrong.com/lw/dr/generalizing_from_one_example/" rel="nofollow">http://lesswrong.com/lw/dr/generalizing_from_one_example/</a>)

I enjoyed this little post as I really related to what he wrote, and the graphs were funny and accurate, but I think he put a bit too much emphasis on "unhappy", which I believe is not accurate. I, and other entrepreneurs I know, are not Always Unhappy. It's more like Never Happy For Long. During the upswing on the graph, I am extremely happy! Ecstatic! But then even though business (let's say) has doubled almost overnight, a month or so will go by with no new growth, and I'm just miserable, wondering how I can make something happen.<p>I would chalk this up to the human tendency to always want the next thing, or always want what one doesn't have. And that personality type I think is a perfect fit for a self driven risk taker entrepreneur types.

First article I've seen approaching emotional state in this manner, so kudos to that. Back at MIT, I also came to this realization and my friends and I used to say "it's all about the ddt" whenever life got us down (or even up, as a cautionary tale to not get too excited and watch out). We were of course referring to d/dt of life, and how that had more influence on our states than the absolute position of our lives. Nothing proven, but an observation that held up very well in all our lives. We still have this saying amongst ourselves - glad to see others thinking along this path now.

This can be applied to all life. Sorry but founders are now sounding like doctors, thinking they have a monopoly on stress and ups and downs.

I don't think unhappy is the right word (and even the post doesn't claim the always part) but the first line of Derman's book springs to mind as a partial explanation.<p>"Ambition is a state of permanent dissatisfaction with the present - Emanuel Derman"

As someone who was early stage at a startup, I appreciate the reminder to stop and smell the roses. As someone who's been grinding for four years now, it's easy to forget how far you've come.

I always never use the words 'always' and 'never'. They are always never true.

Interesting observations about founder happiness (or lack thereof)

pretty sure it's because they're all mentally ill, delusional, narcissistic egomaniacs with technology addictions and nothing meaningful to live for besides Y Combinator