Ask HN: Depressed HN

From my experience the problem is generally short lived, and manifests around our (meaning my group of friends) mid-20s.<p>My assertion is the problem stems from hacker types being more introspective (I hesitate to use the word &quot;smarter&quot;) than your average person, which leads to the following realisation for most of us: We are not normal enough to enjoy a simple life of working 9-5 and partying on the weekends, but not brilliant or lucky enough to achieve the success we would like to attain.<p>Realising the above means deciding to &quot;settle&quot; for a life of drudgery or toiling forever with the prospect of ending up like a failed delusional &quot;wannabe&quot;. Both thoughts being rather depressing as we essentially struggle with our unfulfilled ambition.<p>The thing is though, as I&#x27;m in my early 30s, now find that my friends have generally found other interests in their life to find pleasure in; rather than just being focused on career or success as a metric.<p>We find peace in being slightly above average, reaching mid-level management or senior technical positions, and enjoying the stable financial environment we are able to provide our partners&#x2F;families.<p>Although the point is a bit after-school-special, but when you stop focusing on what you can&#x2F;cannot do for yourself but what you can do for others, there can be tremendous fulfilment in that, which alleviates our otherwise depressive tendencies.

&gt; My question is why are hackers so depressed?<p>Consider the possibility that this conclusion results from a sampling error. Hackers may not experience depression at rates different than the general population. Your observation may depend on the fact that hackers are willing to post about this issue anonymously, where if they had to identify themselves, they wouldn&#x27;t express the same ideas.<p>Also, because of their technical knowledge, hackers are more likely to access and use online discussion forums, which may make them seem to have a higher depression rate than people less able and willing to make posts in social media.<p>So maybe this is a non-issue.

A few guesses: social isolation, physical isolation (spending all your time in the same places, e.g. living alone and only leaving your house to go to work, or working at home), burnout, unemployment, unfulfilling jobs, childhood traumas (e.g. bullying, abuse), worries about the future (fear of ageism in their fields of work, fear of losing touch with technologies or current practices)...<p>HN&#x27;s getting more of those posts partly because you can create a throwaway account easily, and also because HNers have been warm and understanding of posters who may be depressed. In other communities there&#x27;s a greater chance of trolls and griefers replying with personal attacks or suggesting suicide.

Working on a startup isn&#x27;t always as easy as it seems. You have to put so much time and effort into it, which can burn out&#x2F;depress people quite a bit. Then, once &#x27;completed&#x27;, if you find your idea has failed, this can add a lot of additional depression. You can also find yourself having to do all kinds of different tasks which you don&#x27;t enjoy, which take up more time than you&#x27;d want.<p>Life can be tough, but being in a startup, which should essentially make your dreams &#x27;come true&#x27;, can be even tougher.

Startups are hard.... (Insert your Snow Clone about shopping here)<p>HN has a lot of Founders_<p>Often when you talk about founders, you&#x27;re talking about people who are putting it all on the line. These are people who quit salaried day-jobs with scheduled amounts of vacation days and health care for the unknown. If they fail, not only do they go down, but their family goes down, so the stress is very high. For that reason, I try to do a hello-world type of check with founders at least once a week. Sometimes something as simple as &quot;Hey, are you OK?&quot; can snap people out of an otherwise spiraling-down depression. Sometimes it takes more.<p>Hackers in general_<p>It is anecdotal, but smart people in general are depressed. It is also an anecdote shared by many—even the Simpsons made fun of this so there is a common thought in society that smarter people are often more depressed. Hackers typically want to solve problems. Often hackers have a better solution to a problem, but that solution will be ignored by society. That leads to frustration and multiple instances of frustration leads to depression.

Because we realize at the end of the day that we spent 8-10 hours a day to get more people to click ads, buy virtual farms, help big financial conglomerates make more money, etc.<p>And we have little to no control over your circumstances. Starting a startup and getting funding relies on getting the approval of investors. Getting a dream career depends on persuading a few gatekeepers, etc.

I&#x27;ve been here a year and a half or so. I think it is a pretty recent trend that I&#x27;ve only noticed in the past 6 months or so, but I could be wrong.<p>My hypothesis is that an isolated post or two really resonated with people and received good responses. People then hope that others will respond similarly to their situation.

From the book &quot;Learned Optimism&quot;: &quot;There is considerable evidence that depressed people, though sadder, are wiser&quot;<p>HN has a lot of smart people on it. It also highlights very different lives from the average person. Sometimes, HN is not much different from entertainment gossip magazines in that people read them and feel depressed that their lives aren&#x27;t like famous people. On HN, it&#x27;s possible that people read stories of &quot;successful&quot; entrepreneurs and get depressed because their lives aren&#x27;t like that. I say &quot;successful&quot; in quotes because it&#x27;s very easy to make anyone look successful if you just look at a tiny portion of their life.<p>Having dealt with this issue as well, I&#x27;ve developed a course that hopefully, helps hackers to deal with these issue. It&#x27;s available at <a href="https://www.programmingspiritually.com" rel="nofollow">https:&#x2F;&#x2F;www.programmingspiritually.com</a> I&#x27;m changing it to a freemium model later this week so there&#x27;s no need to purchase it. If you want to be notified when it&#x27;s available for free, just email me and I&#x27;ll let you know.

My guess that hacker depression some combination of social isolation and lack of self-esteem.<p>For an intelligent, logical person, there are few places to turn to. And they can post here anonymously.

One point not mentioned is that there are higher rates of ASD among programmers, and that ASD is a risk factor for depression.

&quot;Ignorance is bliss&quot;. Is this the opposite?

I am depressed due to social isolation, which others have mentioned, and constant career struggles. Past attempts to strike out on my own have failed, or just not succeeded enough. Software jobs pay extremely well, but at a cost of having to do someone else&#x27;s crap work, including having to follow development practices that I&#x27;d never endorse myself.<p>As for the isolation, I&#x27;m introverted, mostly involved with a lot of reading, learning, and thinking. I get outside to exercise, but don&#x27;t have much to talk to others about. I have no interest in the things that occupy the biggest part of shared reality, like sports, popular TV shows, or politics. I&#x27;ve had many girlfriends in the past, but could only get them and keep them by playing up a fake personality that was funny, tough, daring, sociable. It&#x27;s been my experience that women respond best to a combination of theatrics and measured acquiescence, and that they will give you a lot of feedback on how they want you to be. But as soon as I &quot;be myself&quot; - they&#x27;re bored or annoyed and then they&#x27;re gone.<p>So, now I spend almost all my time by myself, and that&#x27;s depressing. I wished I belonged to something. Also, I&#x27;m 35 and my life is almost identical to what it was a decade ago, except that my body is older and hurts more, so I always wonder why I don&#x27;t feel a sense of progress.