Some people are obsessive seekers. Of riches. Of a calling. Of enlightenment. Of whatever: "If only I had ___, <i>then</i> I'd be happy."<p>My take on Zen Buddhism is that it's engineered to fix that problem. You need X to be happy? Great, let's get you X. Get up at 4 AM and sit quietly. Cook food. Clean dishes. Try to solve nonsense puzzles. Eventually you'll suffer a mild mental breakdown and achieve a realization -- the enlightenment that there is no enlightenment outside you to be found.<p>And anyway, in the meantime at least you'll be focused on quiet activities, not bothering the rest of us. ;)